tag:katrinaburgoyne.com,2005:/blogs/welcome?p=3Blog2022-05-31T17:55:53-05:00Katrina Burgoynefalsetag:katrinaburgoyne.com,2005:Post/69838222022-05-31T17:55:53-05:002023-10-16T09:52:38-05:00The Making Of "Before Summer Starts To Fall"<p><iframe class="justify_inline" data-video-type="youtube" data-video-id="ictvPtnbPGM" data-video-thumb-url="https://img.youtube.com/vi/ictvPtnbPGM/mqdefault.jpg" type="text/html" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/ictvPtnbPGM?rel=0&wmode=transparent&enablejsapi=1" frameborder="0" height="540" width="960" allowfullscreen="true"></iframe></p>Katrina Burgoynetag:katrinaburgoyne.com,2005:Post/64389762020-09-21T10:00:00-05:002020-09-21T10:00:05-05:00We Made A Music Video<p style="text-align: center;"> </p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><iframe class="justify_inline" data-video-type="youtube" data-video-id="_abMT6DKjXw" data-video-thumb-url="https://img.youtube.com/vi/_abMT6DKjXw/mqdefault.jpg" type="text/html" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/_abMT6DKjXw?rel=0&wmode=transparent&enablejsapi=1" frameborder="0" height="360" width="640" allowfullscreen="true"></iframe></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"> </p>
<p style="text-align: center;">Because Steve and I are super geeky! We have a list of all our gear we used! </p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><iframe frameborder="0" marginheight="0" marginwidth="0" scrolling="no" src="//ws-na.amazon-adsystem.com/widgets/q?ServiceVersion=20070822&OneJS=1&Operation=GetAdHtml&MarketPlace=US&source=ac&ref=qf_sp_asin_til&ad_type=product_link&tracking_id=katrinaburgoy-20&marketplace=amazon&region=US&placement=B07X71JK4L&asins=B07X71JK4L&linkId=eeb8a582116e124a85b35b6b9d93ca8a&show_border=false&link_opens_in_new_window=false&price_color=333333&title_color=0066c0&bg_color=ffffff" style="width:120px;height:240px;">&nbsp;<br /> </iframe> <iframe frameborder="0" marginheight="0" marginwidth="0" scrolling="no" src="//ws-na.amazon-adsystem.com/widgets/q?ServiceVersion=20070822&OneJS=1&Operation=GetAdHtml&MarketPlace=US&source=ac&ref=qf_sp_asin_til&ad_type=product_link&tracking_id=katrinaburgoy-20&marketplace=amazon&region=US&placement=B07B43WPVK&asins=B07B43WPVK&linkId=b2c77ef59d75321eee436b36fab68db1&show_border=false&link_opens_in_new_window=false&price_color=333333&title_color=0066c0&bg_color=ffffff" style="width:120px;height:240px;">&nbsp;<br /> </iframe></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><iframe frameborder="0" marginheight="0" marginwidth="0" scrolling="no" src="//ws-na.amazon-adsystem.com/widgets/q?ServiceVersion=20070822&OneJS=1&Operation=GetAdHtml&MarketPlace=US&source=ac&ref=qf_sp_asin_til&ad_type=product_link&tracking_id=katrinaburgoy-20&marketplace=amazon&region=US&placement=B07YDTRDYJ&asins=B07YDTRDYJ&linkId=7a517fa1c0010fa045d61409a764a42d&show_border=false&link_opens_in_new_window=false&price_color=333333&title_color=0066c0&bg_color=ffffff" style="width:120px;height:240px;">&nbsp;<br /> </iframe><iframe frameborder="0" marginheight="0" marginwidth="0" scrolling="no" src="//ws-na.amazon-adsystem.com/widgets/q?ServiceVersion=20070822&OneJS=1&Operation=GetAdHtml&MarketPlace=US&source=ac&ref=qf_sp_asin_til&ad_type=product_link&tracking_id=katrinaburgoy-20&marketplace=amazon&region=US&placement=B076NKGRNS&asins=B076NKGRNS&linkId=a56a0927555f11d05675d858cbcbbafc&show_border=false&link_opens_in_new_window=false&price_color=333333&title_color=0066c0&bg_color=ffffff" style="width:120px;height:240px;">&nbsp;<br /> </iframe></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><iframe frameborder="0" marginheight="0" marginwidth="0" scrolling="no" src="//ws-na.amazon-adsystem.com/widgets/q?ServiceVersion=20070822&OneJS=1&Operation=GetAdHtml&MarketPlace=US&source=ac&ref=qf_sp_asin_til&ad_type=product_link&tracking_id=katrinaburgoy-20&marketplace=amazon&region=US&placement=B077BWD2BB&asins=B077BWD2BB&linkId=009f03ae726b776b1696664e0dd26083&show_border=false&link_opens_in_new_window=false&price_color=333333&title_color=0066c0&bg_color=ffffff" style="width:120px;height:240px;">&nbsp;<br /> </iframe><iframe frameborder="0" marginheight="0" marginwidth="0" scrolling="no" src="//ws-na.amazon-adsystem.com/widgets/q?ServiceVersion=20070822&OneJS=1&Operation=GetAdHtml&MarketPlace=US&source=ac&ref=qf_sp_asin_til&ad_type=product_link&tracking_id=katrinaburgoy-20&marketplace=amazon&region=US&placement=B077BWD2BB&asins=B077BWD2BB&linkId=f4b90b0ff8579208d66273656e7d4b8b&show_border=false&link_opens_in_new_window=false&price_color=333333&title_color=0066c0&bg_color=ffffff" style="width:120px;height:240px;">&nbsp;<br /> </iframe><iframe frameborder="0" marginheight="0" marginwidth="0" scrolling="no" src="//ws-na.amazon-adsystem.com/widgets/q?ServiceVersion=20070822&OneJS=1&Operation=GetAdHtml&MarketPlace=US&source=ac&ref=qf_sp_asin_til&ad_type=product_link&tracking_id=katrinaburgoy-20&marketplace=amazon&region=US&placement=B07XBX32GR&asins=B07XBX32GR&linkId=7a99c24c9360ffa5ea7fe670936ca9af&show_border=false&link_opens_in_new_window=false&price_color=333333&title_color=0066c0&bg_color=ffffff" style="width:120px;height:240px;">&nbsp;<br /> </iframe><iframe frameborder="0" marginheight="0" marginwidth="0" scrolling="no" src="//ws-na.amazon-adsystem.com/widgets/q?ServiceVersion=20070822&OneJS=1&Operation=GetAdHtml&MarketPlace=US&source=ac&ref=qf_sp_asin_til&ad_type=product_link&tracking_id=katrinaburgoy-20&marketplace=amazon&region=US&placement=B07G5TWZXK&asins=B07G5TWZXK&linkId=f09e64743901d196ca37b801bf682d46&show_border=false&link_opens_in_new_window=false&price_color=333333&title_color=0066c0&bg_color=ffffff" style="width:120px;height:240px;">&nbsp;<br /> </iframe></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><iframe frameborder="0" marginheight="0" marginwidth="0" scrolling="no" src="//ws-na.amazon-adsystem.com/widgets/q?ServiceVersion=20070822&OneJS=1&Operation=GetAdHtml&MarketPlace=US&source=ac&ref=qf_sp_asin_til&ad_type=product_link&tracking_id=katrinaburgoy-20&marketplace=amazon&region=US&placement=B015R0IQGW&asins=B015R0IQGW&linkId=a8aafcf3d339c02f539315b1cd572b8d&show_border=false&link_opens_in_new_window=false&price_color=333333&title_color=0066c0&bg_color=ffffff" style="width:120px;height:240px;">&nbsp;<br /> </iframe></p>Katrina Burgoynetag:katrinaburgoyne.com,2005:Post/64390322020-09-20T22:55:44-05:002020-09-20T22:56:27-05:0025 Cents In The Ashtray Music Video<p style="text-align: center;"><iframe allow="accelerometer; autoplay; clipboard-write; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture" allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="315" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/mQmILASTGfI" width="560"></iframe></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><a contents="WATCH THE VIDEO" data-link-label="" data-link-type="url" href="https://youtu.be/mQmILASTGfI" target="_blank">WATCH THE VIDEO</a></p>
<p> </p>
<p>Katrina Burgoyne moved from Australia to Nashville with $15,000 and a dream. Restricted by her visa to making an income solely from playing music, she hit the ground running in the most competitive music city in the world. ‘I would take a gig anywhere,’ she says. ‘I drove three hours to make $150; I was scared, broke and alone. But I promised myself that someday I would look back and think how amazing the time really was.’ </p>
<p>Burgoyne’s newest single, ’25 Cents in the Ashtray’, sees her keep that promise to herself. It perfectly captures her memories of loading her beat-up car with fuel and praying that it would get her to Memphis for the next show, while also showcasing the storytelling and vocals that have seen her perform alongside acts like Kasey Chambers, Shane Nicholson, Catherine Britt and Troy Cassar-Daley. </p>
<p>The single was produced by Burgoyne’s boyfriend Stephen Kinney, who studied under multi Grammy Award winning engineer Steve Bishir, the mixer behind over 100 #1 Billboard-charting singles. Kinney was offered an internship at Ben Folds Studio on Nashville’s Music Row, but instead chose to get a ‘real job’ and produce songs on the weekend as well as creating occasional demos with Burgoyne. <br><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/da4d581bf5533d92a282dc98337e779dfefd585b/original/january-03-2018-1.jpg/!!/undefined/b:W1sic2l6ZSIsIm1lZGl1bSJdXQ==.jpg" class="size_m justify_left border_" /></p>
<p>‘After losing his job during the Covid pandemic, Steve and I started tracking my songs during lockdown,’ says Burgoyne. ‘We ended up making a record in our studio apartment in downtown Nashville, sending tracks to Australian players for banjo and mandolin. We sound-proofed the closet with whatever clothes we could find and tracked vocals in the dead of night when the apartment building was quiet. It was when “my music” really became “our music”.’ </p>
<p>The music video for ’25 Cents in the Ashtray’ is also the result of the couple’s collaboration. ‘Creating this project has been a really wonderful journey for us to combine our passion for music, film and photography,’ says Burgoyne. The video was filmed an hour south of Nashville on a quiet country road. They enlisted the help of Alex Jeffrey and Nathan Rogers for the project, with Rogers providing the beautiful Chevy pickup truck for the shoot. </p>
<p>‘Filming the video actually felt like another day on the road heading to a show,’ says Burgoyne, ‘except for having Steve squished under the dash trying to film.’ Given Burgoyne normally drives to shows with no music playing, singing song ideas as she goes, the video was a fun, natural process, similar to the recording of the single itself. </p>
<p>It’s certainly a far cry from some of Burgoyne’s previous experiences on camera, with the talented singer appearing on the 2014 series of The Bachelor with Blake Garvey and Sam Frost, the latter of which she still keeps in touch with. She’s come a long way since her brief reality stint, having toured across Texas, Louisiana, Alabama and Tennessee, and up through Virginia, West Virginia, New York and more. It’s no wonder Catherine Britt called Burgoyne ‘one of the hardest-working and best songwriters that Australia has seen or produced in a long time. It makes perfect sense that she continues her journey and growth in Nashville amongst the best in the world.’ </p>
<p>Burgoyne has previously tasted success with the two Top 10 CMC singles ‘Ghost’ and ‘I Wasn’t Gonna Cry’. Her song ‘White Flag’ also peaked at #7 on CMR, while the album of the same name went Top 10 on the ARIA Country Albums chart in 2011. She’s also written for many artists, including a track for Lisa McHugh that was the most Shazammed song in all of Ireland. McHugh is a frequent writing partner and their songs have had over 800,000 streams on Spotify alone. </p>
<p>The release of ’25 Cents in the Ashtray’ is an exciting moment in Burgoyne’s already impressive career and sees her open her Nashville chapter – on record, at least – in an unforgettable way. With plenty more music to come, Burgoyne has positioned herself as one of Australia’s most exciting talents in Nashville.</p>Katrina Burgoynetag:katrinaburgoyne.com,2005:Post/64331622020-09-14T10:22:29-05:002021-02-22T13:54:28-06:00Wisconsin Woods<p>Hey Friends, </p>
<p>Steve, Eli and I went on an adventure. We wanted to share it with you. </p>
<p>Kat</p>
<p><iframe class="justify_inline" data-video-type="youtube" data-video-id="Fnm267HJS6k" data-video-thumb-url="https://img.youtube.com/vi/Fnm267HJS6k/mqdefault.jpg" type="text/html" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/Fnm267HJS6k?rel=0&wmode=transparent&enablejsapi=1" frameborder="0" height="360" width="640" allowfullscreen="true"></iframe></p>Katrina Burgoynetag:katrinaburgoyne.com,2005:Post/63870162020-07-18T16:02:58-05:002020-09-20T22:58:50-05:00It All Falls Down<p style="text-align: center;">I'm so excited to share with you all that new music is here! </p>
<p style="text-align: center;">Please head on over to you favorite streaming platform and press follow. </p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><a contents="CLICK HERE" data-link-label="" data-link-type="url" href="https://geni.us/ItAllFallsDown" target="_blank">CLICK HERE</a></p>
<p> </p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/4a1b71b5a4fe5dc7edcd6c68fd056a047c7a90d1/original/it-all-falls-down-art.jpg/!!/b:W10=.jpg" class="size_l justify_center border_" /></p>Katrina Burgoynetag:katrinaburgoyne.com,2005:Post/63793602020-07-07T22:30:32-05:002020-07-07T22:31:17-05:00New Music Is Coming July 17<p style="text-align: center;"><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/4a1b71b5a4fe5dc7edcd6c68fd056a047c7a90d1/original/it-all-falls-down-art.jpg/!!/b:W10=.jpg" class="size_l justify_center border_" /></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><strong><span style="color:#e67e22;"><span class="font_xl">NEW MUSIC IS COMING JULY 17 </span></span></strong></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><span class="font_large">I am bursting with excitement for the new release! </span></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><span class="font_large">As a valued member of the KB family I'll be sending you early access to the lyric video and other exclusive content so keep your eyes pealed in your inbox. </span></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><span class="font_large">Pre-Order the new single now on iTunes by following the link below!</span></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><span class="font_large"><strong><a contents="CLICK HERE TO PRE-ORDER NOW!" data-link-label="" data-link-type="url" href="https://geni.us/NewSongPreOrder" target="_blank"><span style="color:#e67e22;">C</span></a><a contents="CLICK HERE TO PRE-ORDER NOW" data-link-label="" data-link-type="url" href="https://geni.us/NewSongPreOrder" target="_blank"><span style="color:#e67e22;">LICK HERE TO PRE-ORDER NOW</span></a></strong></span></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"> </p>Katrina Burgoynetag:katrinaburgoyne.com,2005:Post/63631242020-06-23T01:54:47-05:002020-06-23T01:54:47-05:00The Girl In Boots<p><strong><span class="font_large"><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/d770666c967ab5103754b91dd0b456e42314aa58/original/alec-jeffery-shoot-15.jpg/!!/b:W10=.jpg" class="size_l justify_center border_" />Story time </span></strong><br> <br>I remember the first time I got a pair of cowboy boots. <br> <br>My mother got them from Target in my hometown (Gunnedah) they looked like Woody's Boots (from Toy Story) but I wore them so proudly. I felt like I was.. me! <br> <br>From the age of 17, I was obsessed with cute Boho western touches in my outfits. At the time my best friend Jessica and I would dress western, and if I’m honest I was copying her. That year, I made my singing debut on Australian National Television on a TV show Morning With Kerri-Anne in a brown skirt and cowboy boots. My 18th birthday I had a "wild west" theme party with a bucking bull (everyone dressed up, I wore my everyday clothes). <br> <br>I was 22 when an agent asked me to dress more "modern" for a inner city Brisbane show. I went and spent more than my paycheck on black pants and a few cute tops. From then on I shifted into wearing more mainstream clothes. <br> <br>I thought I was "fitting in" little did I know I was "blending in". <br> <br>The moment I wore my first fringe jacket in 2018, I felt the confidence that I hadn't felt since I was 17 naive, fearless and full of ego. <br> <br>Maybe it's Nashville. But not only have I found a place where music is normal. I've found a place where I don't get weird looks from dressing like a badass in fringe. <br></p>Katrina Burgoynetag:katrinaburgoyne.com,2005:Post/62385552020-03-05T14:12:36-06:002021-02-22T13:57:48-06:00Nashville Tornado<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/a8bdf2074c067bdf6c2a299b6ea13f712383c2b8/original/nashville-tornado2.jpg/!!/undefined/b:W1sic2l6ZSIsImxhcmdlIl1d.jpg" class="size_xl justify_center border_" /></p>
<p>Just two nights ago I drove through the scariest storm as I traveled home from my regular Monday evening show in Louisville Kentucky. The rain was so heavy. I was going 40-50 miles an hour with my hazard lights on as I headed down the i65 as lightning crashed beside the interstate and winds were pushing me off onto the outer lines of the road (the ones that make the brrr sound). </p>
<p>As I venture closer to Nashville the storm settled and the heavy rain turned into speckles on my wind shield. I arrived home to an eery feeling in the air. The rumble of the storm in the distance and the black clouds ascending on my favourite city in the world. </p>
<p>Within 15 minutes my phone received a notification of a Tornado Warning. Just like every other Tornado warning, the high winds usually knock over lawn chairs and that’s the extent of the damage. After 3 years in the USA and multiple tornado warnings it’s became a way of life to shrug it off, go back to sleep or go about your day. </p>
<p>As my boyfriend and I watched outside our window from downtown Nashville (that faces north) we both knew this time was different. We frantically put on our shoes, saddled up our German Shepard and collected our id’s and important documents and prepared to take cover in a safe place. </p>
<p>With every crash of lightning that lit up the sky ww watched the black cloud close in on Nashville looking for any formation of a funnel. The winds howled, the rain obnoxiously pelting down and the city siren finally started to ring dully, hardly audible through the rumble of the storm. I’ve never seen anything like this in my life. I’ve never felt so terrified. </p>
<p>“Get to cover, get to cover” my boyfriend yells as the wind rattled the windows fearfully. Eli (our dog), Steve and I took shelter in our bathroom foolishly un-aware of what was outside (We should have taken it more seriously, we should have been in the basement of our apartment). This is a similar view of what we could see from our apartment. </p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/bc827402fc252632048396ef3b52240dc0d2e39e/original/thumbnail.jpg/!!/undefined/b:W1sic2l6ZSIsImxhcmdlIl1d.jpg" class="size_l justify_center border_" /></p>
<p>The tornado touched down 1.4 miles north of us and devastating our friends homes and apartments. This kind of devastation was caused by only a category 3 Tornado producing winds up to 175 mph. I couldn’t imagine facing a category 4 or 5. Twenty-four people have been killed and hundreds of buildings and businesses destroyed. This is Tennessee’s deadliest Tornado in 7 years and I foolishly posted on instagram my Tornado Warning notification like it wasn’t anything to be worried about. I feel like an idiot! If the storm changed its corse and we were hit I’m not sure what consequences we would have faced. </p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/c5b7e55d470f6b9fb7b5c51c572a17eb86adb7e7/original/wireap-a7e787f6def34b838b779ecbb73ab5f3-16x9-992.jpg/!!/undefined/b:W1sic2l6ZSIsImxhcmdlIl1d.jpg" class="size_l justify_center border_" /><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/74fa88f42f46b74ebb6330da2336efc25ac6f11c/original/138269-w-450-300.jpeg/!!/undefined/b:W1sic2l6ZSIsImxhcmdlIl1d.jpeg" class="size_l justify_center border_" /><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/0c9091fd47099665266faadb4cdb577d44b4abe7/original/98f8ee0c-f155-4ead-8e0d-e64690610d4b-tornado-27.jpg/!!/undefined/b:W1sic2l6ZSIsImxhcmdlIl1d.jpg" class="size_l justify_center border_" /></p>
<p>My Nashville family and friends are safe, thank God! But the devastation could take a year to rebuild. My heart aches for my city. </p>
<p>If you would like to donate to the Tennessee Emergence Response fund or contribute in any way you can here: <a contents="DONATIONS & SUPPORT" data-link-label="" data-link-type="url" href="https://www.cfmt.org/story/middle-tennessee-emergency-response-fund/?fbclid=IwAR0hclYnI7SCyfMQ2pk8Afy0spfa7cslgOChU3ZVgGx3bTPF7NdGsAt_LnY" target="_blank">https://www.cfmt.org/story/middle-tennessee-emergency-response-fund/?fbclid=IwAR0hclYnI7SCyfMQ2pk8Afy0spfa7cslgOChU3ZVgGx3bTPF7NdGsAt_LnY</a></p>Katrina Burgoynetag:katrinaburgoyne.com,2005:Post/57163432019-04-11T16:22:38-05:002019-12-07T18:51:31-06:00G'day USA<p>I write to you from my cute apartment in the Gulch in Nashville with my boyfriend's beautiful german shepard named Eli at my heals. </p>
<p>A lot has happened over the last month. I landed back in the USA with Laryngitis, tired and sick (the same over played annoying record). I played a few shows before heading out of town to tour the USA with one of Australia's finest songwriters Catherine Britt. </p>
<p>After spending some time together in Tamworth, Australia she kindly asked me if I would be interested in going on the road with her in the USA. I didn't even think twice... YES! </p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/ce02f65a4db4e372aae0953e99acaa136d073859/original/img-8158.jpg/!!/undefined/b:W1sic2l6ZSIsIm1lZGl1bSJdXQ==.jpg" class="size_m justify_left border_" /><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/0883f2968de2d14223496f08f8962568f9ad3583/original/img-8157.jpg/!!/undefined/b:W1sic2l6ZSIsIm1lZGl1bSJdXQ==.jpg" class="size_m justify_left border_" /></p>
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<p>In March we set off for 3 weeks. Bitty TV in Memphis and Nashville Tennesse, Atlanta Georgia, Lexington Kentucky, South by South West Conference in Austin TX, Baton Rouge LA, the Muddy Creek Music Hall in Winston-Salem NC, all the way to the City Winery in NYC. We performed on radios and the Morning TV show in Virginia. </p>
<p>3.5 gipsies, myself, Catherine, her husband James and their beautiful baby Hank. We tasted some of Americas greatest food from Gumbo to Barbeque to Queso and made some memories that will keep with me for the rest of my life. </p>
<p>I learnt so much on this tour. About taking a bet on myself. I often sit back and am scared to truly take a bet on myself. I go 80% then get scared. Things like being brave enough to take a risk on ticket sales, play a show that barely breaks even if it means to get to the next show that you can make money on. It was a great experience and I was so blown away every time a person showed up to actually came out to see ME. I made some real life friends from my online friends, I felt so blessed. I loved Catherine's story and was captivated even while standing on stage and hearing her story night after night. She is pretty special. Check her out if you havn't come across her music. ROLL TO THE BOTTOM FOR A FEW SNAPS I TOOK FROM OUR ADVENTURE. </p>
<p>I am back in Nashville now. I have been on a loose diet of soups and anti-inflammatory foods (the last two days were hard on meal prep so I ate out) and today my sinuses have flared up. So looks like I go to go back to the soups. It seems like I'm noticing it has to do with food and what I eat. So still figuring out if its an autoimmune thing or basically I'm stuck to eating soups for the rest of my life. I still struggle with fatigue on days like today, all I want to do is sleep so I'm taking it pretty easy at the moment only doing what makes me money rather than takes my energy. </p>
<p>On a personal front, my boyfriend moved into my apartment this week as he sold his house. It's exciting to have someone stand beside me. He flew up to NYC to spend a week there, after our tour and celebrate my birthday. We made so many adventures, we both fell sick with a band cold thing so we were pretty exhausted the whole trip but managed to get out and do things. My favourite was seeing Whicked. My heart is happy and it's nice to feel balanced to have a best friend that I 100% know has my back. </p>
<p>I am working on plans to record as soon as I'm better again. I'm really excited to release. </p>
<p>I wanted to send a big thank you to all my supporters who have helped me through the last year, I feel so blessed for all the friend's music has made me. I after get texts, calls and emails asking how you can help me in any way so I wanted to write a list some fun ways that you could help. </p>
<p>- Sign up to my mailing list (on my homepage- You get a never before released free song download) <br>- Follow me on Spotify <br>- Follow my playlists <br>- Buy some merch <br>- Add my songs to your personal playlists <br>- Host a house concert <br>- Share my posts <br>- Invite your friends to like my page <br>- Invite your friends to my shows </p>
<p>There is sooo much I could write but ultimately I would love to personally connect with you. So feel free to comment on my posts or send me a message. </p>
<p>Thank you so much for all the support. I feel so lucky to be living my dream. </p>
<p>Love you guys. </p>
<p>Katrina </p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/bd131ba999a9630e02eef150d1232cdc44cd11a0/original/img-8243.jpg/!!/b:W10=.jpg" class="size_l justify_center border_" /></p>
<p style="text-align: center;">Baby Hank's Favourite thing about hotels</p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/f11fe71e88be84289745cff4b5573c23b9df689c/original/lrg-dsc02347.jpg/!!/undefined/b:W1sic2l6ZSIsImxhcmdlIl1d.jpg" class="size_l justify_center border_none" alt="Central Station" /></p>
<p style="text-align: center;">Central Station</p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/c6085f62aea82e63c47c4af352224b1686669a46/original/lrg-dsc02410.jpg/!!/b:W10=.jpg" class="size_l justify_center border_" /></p>
<p style="text-align: center;">911 Twin Towers Memorial</p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/d5418b69c9119d2304109e4f6f4c2009c7140e19/original/lrg-dsc02570.jpg/!!/b:W10=.jpg" class="size_l justify_center border_" /></p>
<p style="text-align: center;">Empire State Building</p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/4dc187fb04b84dcc8957ecb2b2d2a2099d5e7de8/original/lrg-dsc02585.jpg/!!/b:W10=.jpg" class="size_l justify_center border_" />Empire State Building</p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/106a94f0c909b7801db8d6a4aa4eebbcd10b796e/original/lrg-dsc02297.jpg/!!/b:W10=.jpg" class="size_l justify_center border_" />James, Catherine & Hank in NYC</p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/66f45e82fc9ce012d2a86d8ac1503cbf6a20322c/original/lrg-dsc01413.jpg/!!/b:W10=.jpg" class="size_l justify_center border_" />James, Hank and Catherine in Louisiana<img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/bda011b86d0cf7d3dd18b1eaffcc393d849fbb2d/original/lrg-dsc02466.jpg/!!/b:W10=.jpg" class="size_l justify_center border_" /> Steve and I in NYC</p>Katrina Burgoynetag:katrinaburgoyne.com,2005:Post/56484232019-02-18T09:07:28-06:002021-02-01T17:57:51-06:00I Still Call Australia Home!<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/3d8ed299cdf5a323fe02b3d2de44665a163c7e2f/original/58760dab-8945-4093-9166-ed870ed21fbe.jpeg/!!/undefined/b:W1sic2l6ZSIsImxhcmdlIl1d.jpeg" class="size_l justify_center border_" />I’m laying out on the patio of my mother’s house at midnight looking at the stars, listening to the crickets and the cows at the Gunnedah sale yard in the distance. </p>
<p>My heart is full. </p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/a73709f3f3582da0cec513a1e422044159986f37/original/5fb8c5e2-0f96-401f-b5b4-e773b3bc8e0b.jpeg/!!/undefined/b:W1sic2l6ZSIsIm1lZGl1bSJdXQ==.jpeg" class="size_m justify_right border_none" alt="" />I pined for home. Nashville was so hard. I questioned my strength more times then ever before. To be here now has sent so many emotions flooding through me over the past two months. </p>
<p>This week I pack up and head back to the USA, although I hope this will be a different journey. </p>
<p>My health is still on the mend. I am working through vocal rest, after a savage sinus infection leaving me with laryngitis for most of my stay I think my mother is feeling a little blessed that I’m not being to loud around the house. </p>
<p>I love Australia, I’ve been in a head space of not wanting to leave. I feel safe here. Nashville is so so hard and I still feel burnt out from not being 100% healthy. I have a sore throat and feel tired all the time. My vacation visiting my family left me sleeping non stop for 2-3 days between hitting the road on my next appointment. The only thing I regret is not being able to give my friends and family my all. </p>
<p>Since being home I have traveled so much. I got a chance to be a songwriting mentor at the CMAA Academy of Country Music. </p>
<p>I walked the red carpet at the CMAA Golden Guitar Awards and cheered on my friends who won big awards. </p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/554c096bada02cf243fb20606cacc62f4747466c/original/7337785e-7eb2-4e7e-8f83-08ee3d4f1059.jpeg/!!/undefined/b:W1sic2l6ZSIsInNtYWxsIl1d.jpeg" class="size_s justify_left border_" />I attended the Tamworth Country Music Festival with Laryngitis and vocal loss I had to cancel half of my shows.... so I slept a lot at home in sick days. </p>
<p>I visited an ear, nose, throat doctor who had me leaving his room in tears... overwhelmed that I didn’t have any vocal damage on my inflamed local chords after months and months of singing through laryngitis to pay the bills. </p>
<p>With help from medication... I performed at my one and only Offical Australia Show on the first stage I ever stood on. It was an incredible event where I worked with the local kids and scouted talent to be apart of the show. </p>
<p>Brisbane, Sydney, Sunshine Coast, Gunnedah, Tamworth, Newcastle I visited you all. </p>
<p>I honestly was beginning to think I didn’t want to go back to Nashville. I was scared and felt full and happy here. I’ve never wanted to be right where I am in my life. I’ve always been aiming for my next goal. </p>
<p> </p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/e20d642d04e76d013cccff1d326289955cef8e74/original/a53447b9-5b65-4533-b8f8-3df7900e3c98.jpeg/!!/undefined/b:W1sic2l6ZSIsIm1lZGl1bSJdXQ==.jpeg" class="size_m justify_left border_" /><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/d6756dbe7e8b44ca7fe4927958e6705c08a251b6/original/7394a223-f022-4f6a-9cf1-8629feab568d.jpeg/!!/undefined/b:W1sic2l6ZSIsIm1lZGl1bSJdXQ==.jpeg" class="size_m justify_center border_" /><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/c72c54e6fb13a9b5b4ebba1d7946c6feaaad0277/original/812039cf-3fd7-4beb-9462-8c2517926025.jpeg/!!/undefined/b:W1sic2l6ZSIsIm1lZGl1bSJdXQ==.jpeg" class="size_m justify_left border_" /><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/ed4e8969198f74952b35c83ab5981c6b93908d38/original/508b77e7-4fd3-4603-a757-5a212fcf7fe6.jpeg/!!/undefined/b:W1sic2l6ZSIsIm1lZGl1bSJdXQ==.jpeg" class="size_m justify_center border_" /><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/5bb77808d10651a0cbf9084cc02d1b325676febf/original/57dd62da-314b-43dd-a59a-096a8ecd3453.jpeg/!!/undefined/b:W1sic2l6ZSIsIm1lZGl1bSJdXQ==.jpeg" class="size_m justify_center border_" /><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/bab4593ea206e4fded9fe3e201afb56b6c8f109f/original/39e817d4-0bd4-4c61-9ce3-e4b86fabbbc1.jpeg/!!/b:W10=.jpg" class="size_l justify_center border_" /><br><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/9281895d202a7d75f911f8758026172b17af921d/original/3dd67eab-d3de-4265-8266-6a18a11b52cb.jpeg/!!/undefined/b:W1sic2l6ZSIsImxhcmdlIl1d.jpeg" class="size_l justify_center border_" /></p>
<p>I think the world works in such a crazy way and as a really strong Indipendent women I got to a point last year where I no longer want to do this on my own and after two months of being here I didn’t want to turn around and live my unhealthy, struggling existence in Nashville again so far from emotional support.</p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/f6a6444e41a80c847e40ab286363b52b1b55adb1/original/90d53ce8-b42d-4676-a0b7-8ed986fb4bd3.jpeg/!!/undefined/b:W1sic2l6ZSIsIm1lZGl1bSJdXQ==.jpeg" class="size_m justify_left border_" />I met Steve November 13 in a bar Downtown Nashville when I went for 1 drink with my band after a show. I was going home to Australia and doubted I could keep a guys attention for two months half a world away... (been there, done that). </p>
<p>I was so out of the head space of romance. We ended up dating for 4 weeks, super casually. I left thinking I would never talk to him again. Emotionally I was cut off. </p>
<p>For two months we spoke over FaceTime. I was busy and distracted playing shows, seeing family, sleeping and trying to heal. Typical me. I’m described as peanut brittle. Hard to get your teeth into but if you work on my long enough I become the sweetest, softest little treat you’ve ever had. </p>
<p>In early January and he asks me to be his valentine. I made a joke and said “If you want to come to Australia”. </p>
<p>Sure enough he brought a ticket. </p>
<p>Steve landed in Gunnedah the day of my one official Australian show and filmed me playing to a full house at the Gunnedah town hall! </p>
<p>He wisked me away to the Gold Coast for a much needed vacation away from sleeping off a stuffy head or focusing on my sore throat. Somehow he calved his name on my heart, I’ve never felt so sure about someone. </p>
<p>As I pack my bags and get ready to take on this adventure all over again. I do it with refreshed eyes, I feel so brave having someone stand beside me holding my hand through this now. Although my body still needs healing, I’m excited to see what I can build from a place of feeling safe and cared for. </p>
<p>Bring on 2019! </p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/d59f197bc5581714b8f820280d83cb56bd33da56/original/a941a021-fd59-4b95-bb11-58dd8b5a12a1.jpeg/!!/undefined/b:W1sic2l6ZSIsImxhcmdlIl1d.jpeg" class="size_l justify_center border_" /></p>
<p> </p>Katrina Burgoynetag:katrinaburgoyne.com,2005:Post/55356492018-12-09T23:00:00-06:002021-02-22T13:53:34-06:00Tennessee<p>This year has been one hell of a challenge from two sinus operations to being down to my last dollar wondering how I'm going to pay rent, almost coming to terms with the thought that I have to give up this dream and move back to Australia, to dancing on the cusp of depression. I've never felt more alone and helpless in my life. </p>
<p>However, this year has been one heavenly year full of magic. From finding a doctor that offered me $15k worth of surgery to landing a show that took me across the country, topping up my spirit with adventure as I explored San Fransico, California and my skimpy bank account, securing me with enough money to pay for my VISA renewal next year. </p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/1be44b75d5141ec3fdf2a770cb901a65c242e2d7/original/img-6099.jpg/!!/b:W1sic2l6ZSIsIm1lZGl1bSJdXQ==.jpg" class="size_m justify_left border_" /></p>
<p> I began the year in a spin. Lost, I felt my body resonating at a nervous energy. I'd go out and drink until I would black out. If I'm honest, I wasn't happy. I was waiting for that publishing deal. Doing all the things I thought I should be doing, running endlessly on the hampster wheel of Nashville. You wanna see a burnout? Mine was in heartbreakingly slow motion with every facet of my life exhausted, head, heart, body and soul. </p>
<p>It sucks out here, by myself without a place to escape and feel at home for a day or two and just reconnect, recharge and heal. Despite the distance, my Mother has been my backbone, gosh I thought I was big enough to pick myself up but Mum you gave me the only ounce of strength I had. I am so grateful. </p>
<p>October rolled around and I told myself I was "going on vacation". Vacation really just meant do all the things that don't pay my rent when I feel like it, rather than put pressure on myself. I realized that I had been running on this hamster wheel and getting nowhere. </p>
<p>After almost 2 months of rest and reflection, I feel like I have reconnected with my truest self again. I'm a loner. A solitary person that has a passion for getting lost in creating in the middle of the earliest hours of the morning. I'm the girl that can entertain a room full of people and be the life of the party, but the girl with social anxiety in large crowds, unless I have my closest friends with me. I'm the girl that forms very few bonds but when I do they are deep. The small town country kid with a gipsy soul, a thrill of adventure and connecting with people. </p>
<p>It's funny that since finding myself again, I relearnt the lesson that home isn't where we grow up, it's in our heart and if we are whole and happy we can be whole and happy anywhere. </p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/496144d360003d8613e2fd4084d863eb372f6215/original/img-6100.jpg/!!/b:W1sic2l6ZSIsIm1lZGl1bSJdXQ==.jpg" class="size_m justify_right border_" /> Tennessee is my home now and although I will always have an ache in my heart for my homeland, I feel blessed for the discomfort and potential to grow. </p>
<p>Today I am Australia bound, my very first time in two years. I am so excited, I'm so ready. Brisbane, Sydney, Byron Bay, Newcastle, Coffs Harbour, Gunnedah, Tamworth you are all on my list to adventure. I am so blessed to have family scattered across the country so my need to travel will be topped up. </p>
<p>I have decided to put on one official show while I'm in Australia. I wanted to pick a special location and couldn't think of a better place than the first stage I stood on at the Town Hall in Gunnedah. </p>
<p>Going back to my roots performing in the school choir. I will be inviting and featuring local talent and incorporating the creative community from my hometown. Connecting with my first ever band Steve McCauley and Trevor Stacey this night is going to be so special. </p>
<p>There is only a limited amount of tickets so grab your tickets if you don't want to miss out. </p>
<p>This month I release my last Demo Session for 2018 onto spotify and apple music. Thank you so much for those of you who have spun my songs, it means more than you know. </p>
<p> </p>
<p><span class="font_large"><span style="color:null;"><em><span style="color:null;"><strong>Story</strong></span><strong> behind Tennessee</strong></em></span></span></p>
<p><em>One evening I was playing my regular Tuesday night show Downtown, Nashville and a tall handsome man stood at the bar smiling at me, he felt like an old friend, someone I had met before. </em></p>
<p><em>That night we ended up country dancing, laughing and talking till 4 am and fighting </em><em>falling</em><em> asleep in a booth at the downtown dinner, it's not really all that romantic. </em></p>
<p><em>I meet, dance, talk and laugh with guys all the time but this guy felt like a lifelong friend. I felt really safe like he caught me from spinning and just held my hand for a second and pushed me forward to keep going on my truest path. </em></p>
<p><em>As quickly he appeared he was gone. The next day, off to the big city of New York to chase his dreams. </em></p>
<p><em>Maybe it was my strange addiction of wanting things I don't have or my romanticism. Who knows, but long story short, we kept in touch for a few weeks until he faded away just like the Nashville's iconic batman building did in his revision mirror. </em></p>
<p><em>Reflecting on this meeting, sometimes the smallest moments can impact peoples lives. Despite it never </em><em>amounting</em><em> to anything, I really needed to feel protected and safe for a second on this side of the world and for someone to just catch me and offer me their genuine kindness, I couldn't help but catch a case of the feels. </em></p>
<p><em>This was my way of keeping that memory in song, blowing out the flame and watching the smoke dance-off in the wind. </em></p>
<p><em>"Out there in the unknown, I hope the light in you is shining bright". </em></p>Katrina Burgoynetag:katrinaburgoyne.com,2005:Post/53553332018-07-20T13:22:05-05:002020-09-07T06:11:53-05:00I've Been So Angry At God!<p>In 2014 determined in my recovery to be medication free from depression. I experienced a challenging chapter in my life; withdrawing from my "happy pills". These made me numb for 18 months where I felt so lost and hollow. I struggled to hear music in my ears and inspiration was nowhere to be found. </p>
<p>Coming off the medication I remember bundling myself up into a ball in my damp "dungeon” like basement bedroom in Newcastle, Australia as I felt every emotion that I had suppressed come weighing down on me like a tone of bricks. I had spent 6 months preparing myself as I gained knowledge of personal development and spiritual growth. I remember praying in the dark as I looked up at the moon out my window. "God, make it hurt. Make it hurt so bad that I never have to experience anything like this again". Releasing what no longer served me I started realizing that I was becoming aligned with the universe. I started to see little signs. </p>
<p>An email to tell me I got my first Nashville cut appeared out of nowhere from the ONE and only song that was demoed in Nashville from FIVE years before. I started to feel this calling within me, I knew I needed to go to Nashville. </p>
<p>In 2015 I boarded a plane knowing less than a handful of people stateside. I had absolutely no expectations, but somehow the universe was sending me messaged and guiding me. By the end of my trip, I wrapped up my last week playing a headline show at the Bluebird Cafe. </p>
<p>My journey to get here wasn't hard. I just knew the work I had to put in to make it happen and rolled up my sleeves for 14 months. </p>
<p>There wasn't a lot I "knew in my heart" after the fact of me landing. It was like walking one step at a time into the darkness only being able to see where my next step will land. </p>
<p>2017, was full of adventure and a hell of a lot of hard work. I FREAKING DID IT, I got off a plane and stepped into a country and built my business from nothing in two months. I never needed to call home for help, everything just fell into place. I moved into my dream apartment. I actually would dream about living here and little victories would happen. But I guess I didn't stop to see them as a gift or a sign from above that everything is in divine order. </p>
<p>In November 2017 I fell sick like I do every winter with a sinus infection. Then December came around and I fell sick with a sinus infection. Then January came around, I fell sick with a sinus infection and completely lost my voice for a whole week. Then February came around I was sick with another sinus infection. Every time they would hit it would be worse than the last. </p>
<p>I started to find myself on Broadway having the time of my life drinking until I would black out, waking up to messages from guys that I don't remember kissing. For those that know me, know I only drink when I'm broken. The only way I could feel "ok" is by drowning my anxiety, fear and stress with whatever drink the handsome gent at the bar will buy me. I would wake up even more sick with no voice at all, my body would resonate with this horrible vibration of fear. Then all the guilt would set in, feeding my body with so much negative self-talk. </p>
<p>March came another week off work, April came another week off work. My vocal loss never really went away I always had a lump in my throat. When Nashville started to heat up I felt amazing and almost like my old self until the end of May hit me the hardest of all I faced two full weeks with no voice, since then I struggle to get through a 3-hour gig. </p>
<p>Doctors were prescribing me chronic allergy medication. With doctors visits and medication, I was spending over $200 a month just for my health that didn't seem to be helping. </p>
<p>I remember late one night calling my Dad, I just cried and felt so helpless he cried too "Just keep swinging flossy" (My Dad calls me Flossy) "when you feel like you have nothing left in you, get up again and just keep swinging. My little girl is the strongest person I know, I need you to keep swinging". (I'm crying right now as I write this). My credit card became maxed out from trying to keep afloat until I looked at my last $100. </p>
<p>I'VE BEEN SO ANGRY AT GOD. I did what I was asked, I sacrificed so much to follow where I was being guided, I have broken my own heart so many FUCKING times to follow every FUCKING sign. I've completely given myself to the universe, I surrendered and challenge myself to become everything I have been asked too. </p>
<p>I called my Mum and just burst into tears. "I can't do this anymore" as my Mum always does, she somehow always knows exactly what to say to give me that little bit of strength. </p>
<p>She suggested maybe going back to Australia until I figure out why I'm so sick, suggested that maybe it's stress and gave me money to enjoy a stress-free week off to nurture myself, with one rule. No late nights, no alcohol and lots of rest. This week was one of my best friends weddings and my best friends 21st birthday. But I respected her rules and was grateful to have some time to clear my head. </p>
<p>I started teaching singing and songwriting lessons online, singing demos and generating a new income stream from the limitations I had. </p>
<p>I opened up a daily devotional booked called "100 Days To Brave" by Annie F.Downs after a night of sobbing and feeling "stuck". </p>
<p>The title of the daily devotion I opened up to was "You Are Braver Than You Know". I want to share a little bit of this reading with you: </p>
<p>"I never felt brave. But day after day, I just did the next thing, took the next step, said the next yes. And God built a life for me in Nashville that I could not have dreamed up for myself." (I'm crying right now as I write). </p>
<p>Unknowing I brought a book by an author that had lived in Nashville. I wept harder then I think I've ever wept. THERE WAS MY SIGN. I knew I had stopped trusting in the universe and nourishing my spirituality. I knew that my compass had been warped and I wasn't aligned with my true north. </p>
<p>So, I got back to work. Journaling, reading, nurturing and topping myself up with all the love I had neglected to give myself. </p>
<p>The doctor called me and told me that I will have to find an Ear, Nose Throat doctor by calling myself as the one they refer me to only take patients with Medical insurance, otherwise, it will be $1,000. I felt defeated but I knew I would be ok. I knew I just needed to connect to above and the path will become clear. </p>
<p>I found a doctor on google that was only going to charge $150 for a consultation. Dr Marvel used a scope down my nose and suggested that I go for more tests. I needed to go to a nearby clinic and get my vocal chords checked and a deeper look into my sinuses. I'm not sure if I gave a stray dog energy that day, maybe it was the tears in my eyes. Maybe he knew how defeated I was. </p>
<p>He suggested that if I was willing to drive an hour and a half to his clinic in another town he would be able to do all the tests there and he will do it for a standard consultation fee. </p>
<p>That week I journaled how I've searched for romantic pursuits out of fear. I've been so scared. I longed to have someone protect me to feel safe or a sense of belonging here half a world away from home or just someone to care if I was ok and wrap me up when I'm not (which felt like most of first half of 2018). </p>
<p>That day I surrendered, concluding that I was silly to have such limiting beliefs as I need to trust that the universe has my back. That God is the one protecting me and keeping me safe. </p>
<p>I went through the most glorious drive through the country to see Dr Marvel. As we worked through examination my eyes welled up with tears to hear the news that I have no vocal damage. The doctor tested me for allergies, I'm allergy free. The answer came with the results of chronic sinusitis. </p>
<p>Dr Marvel looked at my welled up eyes and said that he is going to make me better and do all he can to make it possible for me to have the much-needed operation to fix my sinusitis. </p>
<p>I held myself together enough to make it to my car. It was 6 am Australian time and I woke my Mother up with a phone call and I just cried. </p>
<p>After being so angry at God, I feel like I was just being tested and pushed to my limits. After losing faith in him, he waited until I was ready to receive his help before he sent it. </p>
<p>Thank you universe, thank you God! x</p>Katrina Burgoynetag:katrinaburgoyne.com,2005:Post/52643062018-06-04T17:24:20-05:002018-06-19T01:44:10-05:00Smoke<p style="text-align: center;"><em><span class="font_regular">"It'd be so damn easy if I had found you in a glass, I'd be cursing your hangover instead of craving one more drag". </span></em></p>
<p><em><span class="font_regular">I sit at my desk makeup-less, with my ugly google glasses on (the ones I bought online for cheap to replace the second set of glasses I stepped on this year). I'm looking out my window at a skyscraper waiting for the sun to descend and reflect into my eyes from the multiple stories of glass windows. I consciously exhale and let my shoulders drop repeating to myself "surrender". </span></em></p>
<p><em><span class="font_regular">I giggled as I wrote this months title, as I slept for 3 hours waking up constantly with respiratory issues, coughing up mucus, barking like a dog and howling at the moon for my 6th dose of sinus and loss of voice problems since early December. I'm worn out from fighting this thing, I'm worn out from being held back from this thing. But yet again, I remind myself "You can panic and splash about in the depths gasping for air, or you can relax and ride the tide till it brings you to the shore". Once again I exhale "surender". </span></em></p>
<p><em><span class="font_regular">Smoke! The stuff that clouds your vision, the stuff that disappears, the stuff that takes your breath away, the stuff that can’t be held, the stuff that isn't really there. My drive and ambition to achieve is my motivator to wake up in the morning. I love to reach for that cloud of smoke in hopes it will manifest into something I can grasp. I'm a dreamer, I want to create something from nothing and on days like this when I wake up and am forced to rest, like smoke I realise what I'm reaching for doesn't actually exist, but I'm addicted to it so tomorrow I'll wake up and run towards the illusion once again.</span></em></p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/d0f3424a3bfe2e36d1775a4a98e5fcc78e481d7a/original/katrina-bj-1170-of-332-edit.jpg/!!/b:W1sic2l6ZSIsIm1lZGl1bSJdXQ==.jpg" class="size_m justify_left border_" />Apart from waking up sick with no voice, this month has been an incredible month. Making time for a life of my own has been a really important factor. I'm back exercising and feel more energized and motivated than ever. I've created some really incredible songs that I'm so proud of. I've been working on my recording skills and am feeling so much gratitude for the sunshine and warmer weather to bless the colourful streets of Nashville. I'm working on some really cool products and trying to bring more of myself to the people who I get to be so fortunate enough to share this journey with. </p>
<p>Last month I released a song called "Come Back" as a part of the demo sessions. Here is a little blurb I wrote about it: </p>
<p>I feel like for the last few years I’ve been pretty in tune with my own true north. The spiritual compass that guides me to fill my heart with what it needs. I knew I needed Nashville. </p>
<p>I wrote this song about meeting someone just before moving to the USA! </p>
<p>He said to me “All you have to do is come back”. At the time it felt like a double-edged sword and like God was being so unkind to fulfilling a lifelong dream and making it so bittersweet. </p>
<p>I knew if I went back I would give an incomplete version of myself to someone. Thankfully, I had already lived that lesson and already knew that outcome. </p>
<p>So instead my process of letting go and wishing him well began in the writing room. “Come Back” came to life with the help of Mary Kutter. </p>
<p>Smoke is the next part of that story. I remember every element of my life had changed. I was so scared beginning this new journey over the other side of the world. I found myself not ready to let go of the emotional security my ex-gave me, he became my lifeline. We would walk our days while the other one was sleeping to exchange words of encouragement and hope over the phone half a world away. </p>
<p>I've always surrounded myself with "brother" figures. I have a lot of men in my life that look out for me and keep me safe and give me that emotional support, not that I need it often. I think knowing that someone is there is all I need to fulfil that need in me. </p>
<p>In the past, I've been so blessed to transition from dating someone to a sibling friendship when the relationship dissolved, I do sibling relationships better than the romantic ones. I believe that if someone leaves a mark on my heart, they are engrained in it forever. I want to push hurt aside and be each other's cheer squad (but I'm weird like that). </p>
<p>This relationship was different, we both knew we needed to cut that rope. We no longer were allowing each other to grow, instead, we were stagnant. Reflecting on what our relationship had become since moving to the USA the song "Smoke" was created with the help of Jake Anderson. </p>
<p>Through resentment we both had challenging times to sustain a friendship or a kind hand of support. It was a hard relationship to keep. Now everything is water under the bridge, I have so much respect for my ex, we both went through a heartbreaking time together and he helped me as best he could through one of the hardest transitions of my life. </p>
<p>Smoke is now available on<a contents=" iTunes, Apple Music and Spotify" data-link-label="Demo Sessions Link Page" data-link-type="page" href="/demo-sessions-link-page" target="_blank"> iTunes, Apple Music </a><a contents=" iTunes, Apple Music and Spotify" data-link-label="Demo Sessions Link Page" data-link-type="page" href="/demo-sessions-link-page" target="_blank">and</a><a contents=" iTunes, Apple Music and Spotify" data-link-label="Demo Sessions Link Page" data-link-type="page" href="/demo-sessions-link-page" target="_blank"> Spotify</a> or you can purchase a direct download from my<a contents=" store page" data-link-label="Store" data-link-type="page" href="/store" target="_blank"> store page</a>. Please remember it means the world to me for you to spin my song on <a contents="Spotify" data-link-label="" data-link-type="url" href="https://open.spotify.com/track/2t5UIjyxKzKOK7gvgMIZtJ?si=RcG_Ip4IR1W2aeEjarrCCQ" target="_blank">Spotify</a>, add me to playlists, share and with friends.</p>
<p>Having a moment when my hands are tied with no voice I realized I have so, so many people who are out there watching me, believing in me and cheering me on, on those hard days. Gosh I have some of the best friends, you really mean the world. </p>
<p>Please don't forget to sign up to my mailing list on my <a contents="home page" data-link-label="Home" data-link-type="page" href="/home" target="_blank">home page</a> to receive a free song.... it's one of my favorite songs too. </p>
<p>From the bottom of my heart, I love you. </p>Katrina Burgoynetag:katrinaburgoyne.com,2005:Post/52640812018-05-29T16:55:30-05:002021-02-17T19:27:32-06:00If I Meant Anything<p>Well, I turned 30 in March... I celebrated it with the deepest love in my life "My Mum". She visited the U.S.A for the first time. We explored Memphis, New Orleans and of course Nashville. For her to come over and just come to my apartment and tell me "You're doing ok, you got this", was everything I needed. She brought me a nice fancy vacuum and took me on a road trip of a lifetime. I have to say it was one of the most special memories I've made with my Mum in years. Gosh, I'm so grateful to have someone so incredible in my life like her... I LOVE YOU MUM.... here are some memories from our trip. </p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/516a62fe1c481938bde9a7fc0c4274f7b164fe47/original/screen-shot-2018-05-29-at-4-53-57-pm.png/!!/b:W1sic2l6ZSIsIm1lZGl1bSJdXQ==.jpg" class="size_m justify_left border_" />It was a Tuesday afternoon, my best Nashville buddy Kaylor and I decided to go to a bar called Kung Fu to drink soda, sit in the sun, play some arcade games and talk. Kaylor is fresh to Nashville all the way from Arizona. We met last summer, and somehow we became everything we both needed here in Nashville. I put $1 in a vending machine that prints out a fortune card for her and out spat strangely enough everything she needed to hear that day. </p>
<p>I giggled and said Kaylor, this year I'm going to start dating the man I'll marry, but I'm going to have one hell of a summer if this is my last "single" status summer. I put another dollar in the machine and out spits a ticket that says "Your wish has been granted". We will wait and see what the future holds. </p>
<p>Love has always been a double-edged sword for me. Its always ended bittersweet. Something in my heart telling me it's never been right, or when I've thought it was right timing was always wrong, still unlucky in love. </p>
<p>Kaylor came at a time when I was in a dark place this winter. Her 20-year-old sas, mixed with an old soul was the first confronting loving, honest hard talk I've had since moving to Nashville. She said to me "I wish you could see yourself how I see you" as she felt my confidence had disappeared, I was hurt by some of my closest friends, I was stressed trying to make ends meet and my health was being sacrificed. </p>
<p>I had recently distanced myself from two people who seemed to be notably careless with my trust and my heart, and I felt like I was evaluating myself, analyzing how I became that worthless to someone. </p>
<p>Last year I thought I might have found someone special. I called Mum "I think I've found the one." It turned out, I wasn't "the only one" and when he explained to me that I was his favorite and the other girls don't mean anything... I was left question myself thinking "If I meant anything, he wouldn't behave like that". So I closed the door on that relationship. </p>
<p>I think every hurt inspires something within us. It's that motivation to dust yourself off, the be challenged yet again to prove to ourselves that we can keep going with this crazy strong resilience we all seem to have, and yes, for me, it also inspires me to create. "If I Meant Anything" was written last November and has finally been released as this months demo sessions project on iTunes, Apple Music and Spotify. I love being this honest in a song; it's like ripping my heart out and letting people examine it. </p>
<p>Please add it to your playlists, follow me or purchase, share with your friends. Every little bit helps. THANK YOU. xxx</p>
<p> </p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/62790890aa2fbcacb4a6660bc48d4dbd74d8d007/original/screen-shot-2018-05-29-at-4-54-08-pm.png/!!/b:W1sic2l6ZSIsIm1lZGl1bSJdXQ==.jpg" class="size_m justify_center border_" /></p>Katrina Burgoynetag:katrinaburgoyne.com,2005:Post/52640802018-05-29T16:53:13-05:002018-11-13T01:55:12-06:00Bridges<p>Well, I reached the 13-month mark of living in Nashville, USA. Every day I wake up and draw the blinds in my studio apartment. I get a flutter in my heart as I feel in awe of Union Station out my window, the same as I did the first time I saw it when I was 21 years old on my first visit here. </p>
<p>In 2011, a psychic told me that I would be moving to the USA (This was before I even thought that was possible). In 2015 she told me it would be like walking over a bridge that will burn down as I cross it. Once I move to the USA I will never be able to move back home. I will change too much, experience to much that moving home my spirit couldn’t be fulfilled. </p>
<p>The growth I’ve found in myself on this adventure has been one that makes me so proud. From loosing 22 pounds from stress, waking up having anxiety attacks. To get back on that plane has been something I’ve wanted to do so many times. I just needed a moment to not feel challenged and to exhale. December and January were really hard to get through. I’ve been sick with sinus since late November. In January I canceled a whole week of shows. </p>
<p>Seasonal depression hits me hard, I stay in and hide away and just feel sorry for myself. Bringing in over 50% of my income from peoples tips and generosity I felt like I was working harder and making less, when this tourist town became a ghost town. I’ve felt disappointed by friends and felt extremely alone. I ended up shutting myself off from people, I didn’t really have anyone I could talk to about how I was feeling here in the USA. My Dad was there a lot, my brother Bradley still gives me pep talks and my Mum as always is a rock. I felt pretty heartbroken and I just needed home, I needed people that know me deeply and could feel safe for a second and no so alone. </p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/29fa2e3aef0267e45aa91ba3bfbf7344055ac249/original/screen-shot-2018-05-29-at-4-52-39-pm.png/!!/b:W1sic2l6ZSIsIm1lZGl1bSJdXQ==.jpg" class="size_m justify_left border_" />Spring is here in Nashville and there is an incredible buzz to the city again and I feel the change of season. I needed a fresh start and a “spring” in my step... (see what I did there?). I feel topped up right now. I’m working more than ever, I get little time with friends but when I do it’s a Saturday night after 6.5 hours of singing and I am letting my hair down and most likely dancing somewhere down on Broadway. </p>
<p>My mother is visiting in 5 short weeks, I’ve spent the last month getting teary about how much I’ve missed her. Also sharing this new life with her, my dream and the love of my life “Nashville”. I really hope she loves Nashville as much as I do, gosh I'm sobbing with a tear running down my face. I kind of feel like a little kid again with a painting and running to Mum hoping she is proud and likes it as much as me. I think having all this distance to the one person that knows me the closest, I hope she can get excited and see why I left Australia. The thing is with my Mum is she's only ever cheered for me, but I just really want her to love it. </p>
<p>On Friday the second installment of the demo sessions was released with a song called “Bridges”. This song snuck into being released earlier than anticipated. It's still a baby, I wrote this less than a month ago with two killer writers from Band Wagon Red Publishing, Sydney Maxine and Reed Waddle. </p>
<p>I was at an event on a Monday night and an older gentleman said to me that he only ever thinks about the women that he hurt so bad that he could never get them back. A part of me thought about some of the people in my life that really meant a lot to me and have hurt me so deeply that I could never give them my trust again. I guess it's a bittersweet karma. </p>
<p>I sat down on the piano, this is where Melodies flow to me. Soon enough this Chorus idea came at me so fast it almost wind me as I felt it hit me. I picked up the guitar and recorded this noodling that I took into the writing session with a few lines like "I can't get over all broken hearts I screwed over". </p>
<p>Within 5 minutes of walking into the writing room my co-writers were excited to work on the idea, by lunchtime we wrapped the song and I came straight home to demo it. </p>
<p>I hope you are enjoying the demo sessions. Please add them to your playlists, share me on facebook and social media. Purchase or stream by clicking the links. </p>
<p>Thank you once again for all the love and support, honestly your friendship means so much to me. </p>
<p>I love you and am so grateful to have you come on this journey with me. </p>
<p>Katrina x</p>Katrina Burgoynetag:katrinaburgoyne.com,2005:Post/52640792018-05-29T16:51:16-05:002020-10-30T21:29:04-05:00Trying To Get To Georgia<p>"You don't come to Nashville to fall in love”, my gorgeous friend Gina Venier shouts out as she takes another sip of her tall glass of Sangria. "But if you do, it's the icing on top," she says as she looks at her partner. </p>
<p>It's the first of the year, as my friends and I have a rare and spontaneous hangout day. I'm having flashbacks of topping off a bottle of red wine, layering up for the -11 degree Celsius chill outside and climbing up the illuminated stairs to Demonbreun street to view the midnight new years fireworks trapped behind Union Station.... it was a massive fail. </p>
<p>I didn't attend the free concert of Keith Urban playing in the park (my body was too cold for that). I didn't get a new years eve kiss, I just wanted to stay at home. </p>
<p>Our new years day conversation continued over many hours at our local bar on the deceivingly sunny yet cold day. "We all move to Nashville to chase our dreams; we have all left people behind, we have given up love many times just to have a chance at tasting this. We are all selfish, we have found comfort in the unknown and unstable, we are either use to the idea of being alone or don't ever feel lonely it from the attention our craft brings us. </p>
<p>I wrote a song in 2016 called "Trying To Get To Georgia" about how men usually have to get where they are going or achieve certain things before they are ready to settle down. "Someday I'll be at your door when I become the man you're looking for; I'm still trying to get to you Georgia". I've often felt the same way. I'll be ready for love when I finally get to where I'm meant to be, if that's Nashville or if that's my music. </p>
<p>Marking 12 months of living in this beautiful country in one of the most exciting cities in the world. I thought I was meant to find love here; I always thought that was why I had such a strange pull to move to Nashville. "That somehow my person was here waiting for me". Last year I kissed less than a handful of men, with fingers to spare (lame right), 1 became an ex, 1 became a friend, and 1 became a heartache and the muse for a few songs. </p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/f1ffd95fea3a31168c5b9c1c9553185e4542765f/original/screen-shot-2018-05-29-at-4-50-40-pm.png/!!/b:W1sic2l6ZSIsIm1lZGl1bSJdXQ==.jpg" class="size_m justify_right border_" />Something came to my attention this month. I went on a tinder date, yep the first tinder date I have been on in maybe three years. He was handsome, flirtatious, hilariously funny and the date lasted 5 hours (until we finally got kicked out of the bar). We both mirrored each other's drive from knowledge and business. Throughout the night, he paused and said, "I don't think you want a relationship". I asked, "why do you say that". He suggested that I'm so driven to keep experiencing new things, adventure and pave my career that if I got into a relationship, I would probably have a part of me questioning if that's what I truly wanted. </p>
<p>The thought of his observation has resonated endlessly. I've never felt like my ex's were "the one." Throughout relationships, I have always questioned if that was what I wanted, but having a love for someone so deeply I could never imagine them not being apart of my life. Thankfully the important ones have never left and have become my dearest friends. </p>
<p>Leaving a man in Australia with an argument of "I've woken up every single day thinking about Nashville and walking towards it for the past few years, I have to leave you and chase this dream" his response was "I've woken up every day thinking of you". I felt like such a selfish person like I've never been able to match the love someone gives me because the fire in my heart to explore and create is such a big part of who I am. </p>
<p>I do desire that kind of love. I would love to feel it. Coming up on my 30th birthday this year, I'm an old maid, I will have my 5th year in a row of a single valentines day. I found I'm so good at being single, that it would take a man a lot of effort to firstly get my attention. I write 4 days a week and play at least 7 shows, between I am managing my bookings, emails and book keeping, if a guy doesn't stand out enough to grab my attention to pull me away from my work, I honestly will forget to respond to his text messages. No one has ever made me love them more then I love music, I'm such a jerk for admitting this. </p>
<p>You're probably wondering why I'm being so translucent about my loveless love life, but since it's Valentines day this month, I thought what better time to reach out to the dreamers and the single folk out there and hopefully get some reassurance that I'm not the only one who is walking this journey alone. </p>
<p>I guess until I get where I'm meant to be, until I feel a need to stop searching and I'm ready to settle or when or if someone ever makes my heart flutter the way music makes it flutter. Music will always be the love of my life, it's a bittersweet curse. </p>
<p>This month saw the launch of the "Demo Sessions" on all streaming services. A new acoustic song will be available the first Friday of every month. This month with valentines day coming, I have decided to release "Trying To Get To Georgia" written from a males perspective, inspired by my realization that someday I hope I'll be ready to give my heart to someone when I become the person my someone is looking for. </p>
<p>Please check it out on Spotify, apple music or you prefer streaming platforms. Share and add it to your personal playlists and please don't forget to follow my artist page.</p>Katrina Burgoynetag:katrinaburgoyne.com,2005:Post/52640782018-05-29T16:49:43-05:002018-05-29T16:49:43-05:00Miles<p>The past month I have traveled many miles. A quick trip to Indiana for a show with my sweet Jessie Brown. Virgina for a house concert. West Virgina, Kentucky, and Alabama for a radio tour. Wisconsin, experiencing my first tailgate and recharging my little spirit in a cabin in the woods. I shot my first gun, saw my first bobcat, heard coyotes in the night. I spent a lot of time removing myself to sit in the quiet, journal and just have a little cry. </p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/9d3df922519bedfb9072a566b248b97bc7120c7f/original/screen-shot-2018-05-29-at-4-49-09-pm.png/!!/b:W1sic2l6ZSIsIm1lZGl1bSJdXQ==.jpg" class="size_m justify_left border_" /> I reflect back through my life so far and feel so blessed for this year. Moving to another country, another culture, away from every comfort I have apart from my guitar has been exciting and hard all in one. However, I feel like life had prepared me for this, nothing will ever challenge me as 2012-2013 did. Being grateful for that chapter in my life as I watched everything come crashing down like dominoes, I faced a lot of my fears; now nothing scares me. Even this month when anxiety reached a crescendo waking up 3-4 nights a week gasping for air fighting off panic attacks, I knew I was safe, and everything was going to be ok. </p>
<p>Moving into my apartment right in the heart of the city has been a game changer for me. Can you imagine running continuously for three years without having a space of your own to just rest, like properly rest and be "yin." I'm such a crybaby; I find myself at night time enjoying my solitude with little tears rolling down my face, after so long, I did it. Having a lot more space in my life has brought me back to the feeling I had when I was starting this journey. Living in Newcastle, I would play gigs on the weekend and sit in my bedroom drawing and creating in attempts to not spend money and grow my skills. I feel like I'm me again, and not a guinea pig on a treadmill. Anxiety doesn't even linger, I'm happy, I'm positive, and I'm whole. It's almost like my Nashville journey has finally just begun. An entirely new chapter, where I feel like I'm finally home. </p>
<p>Next week I'm out to Arkansas and Oklahoma. Checking two more states off my list. I am looking forward to November where I will spend a few months in Nashville. Nestling down for winter, I won't be going home for Christmas. I think I might enjoy it alone in my new apartment this year, trying to see that as a positive rather than feeling sorry for myself. Christmas in the city of my dreams sounds quite magical to me. </p>
<p>I am so blessed for this crazy adventure.</p>Katrina Burgoynetag:katrinaburgoyne.com,2005:Post/52640772018-05-29T16:48:33-05:002018-12-12T04:07:08-06:00Finding My Feet<p>Since my last blog, I have play 68 shows, sat in 20 co-writes, traveled 5 states, played the Bluebird Cafe, supported Lonestar, attended my first county fair, explored Oshkosh, Chicago, Memphis, played a show at the Bluebird Cafe and saw a once in a lifetime solar eclipse. </p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/27f763a2ca8f571232a1a95922d9122a4cfbe103/original/screen-shot-2018-05-29-at-4-47-54-pm.png/!!/b:W1sic2l6ZSIsIm1lZGl1bSJdXQ==.jpg" class="size_m justify_left border_" />I feel a strange sense of inner frustration and anxiety like I'm being pushed and pulled from one place to the next. All of which is my own doing, as I book my calendar full. I'm craving a greater sense of self right now, but for the past three years, music and Nashville are all I've set my focus on. Taking a day off for me means facing the echoes of feeling lost. I don't even know who I am with out working on music every waking hour. I don't know what I do for "fun." I find myself clinging onto people to entertain me, keeping me busy. Thankfully deepening friendships but knowing deep down that I've lost my comfort in solitude. </p>
<p>In moments of solitary I've discovered my passion for photography, I become self-aware; I connected with the spirit and established my sense of faith. To slow down and reconnect with that part of me scares me a little. </p>
<p>This month I'll be coming up on living in the USA for eight months. I've finally found my feet financially. My focus on security has been my primary motivator waking up in the morning. Building a business from scratch with two months grace was incredibly challenging. However, I feel proud to have achieved that. </p>
<p>Anthony, Deric and I in Chacargo at "The Bean" </p>
<p>Exactly eight months after moving here I will get the keys to my very own studio apartment. This month I'll be moving into "The Gulch" which is located right in the city between Downtown and Music Row. It's been four years since I've had my own place without renting a single room out. However, I've always lived with boyfriends. This time I get to do it on my own. I have no furniture, and my belief of not getting credit means I'll buy a nice fluffy rug a table and chairs off Craig's list and slowly wait for bargains to come up on a sofa. </p>
<p>Living 20 mins out of Nashville I sometimes drive the distance two times a day. The potential to save a whole hour a day means I'm going to enjoy an afternoon nap more regularly. </p>
<p>I have met two incredible people in my life. Jessie Brown has become my Nashville bestie and her husband Deric who has taken the roll as my Nashville brother. Since finding these guys Nashville definitely feels like home. Knowing that my family in Australia have all moved on to their own lives and finding family here that are walking the same path as me has been such a comfort. </p>
<p>Emotionally I feel like I'm on top of everything. I miss home like crazy at times. I constantly feel "out of my comfort zone" however I've lived through this feeling before. I love being challenged, I love being given a chance to evolve. I love this city and I love being able to express myself every day in the writing room and not feel like a weirdo for needing to do so. </p>
<p>Life is sweet, I count my blessings and hold my breath as this crazy adventurous ride keeps rocking my world. </p>
<p>Thanks for hanging out. x</p>Katrina Burgoynetag:katrinaburgoyne.com,2005:Post/52640762018-05-29T16:47:14-05:002021-01-29T04:39:19-06:00Stars & Stripes<p>To move oceans away from home and plant my roots in the soil of our big brother's homeland (The USA) I didn't think I would experience that much of a culture shock. </p>
<p>Australia has become a little USA itself in regards to our fascination with celebrities and consumerism in film, tv and music. The USA influences our lack of identity in the arts (in my opinion), and I say this guilty as charged, as my own influence has come from the USA. But living and breathing the stars and stripes and the southern way of life this month I realised how different our cultures are. <br>This week marks my very first 4th of July. I hope to have a weekend planned on the lake with some friends and relaxing from going my regular 100 miles an hour. I've been burnt out and run down. Turns out going 12 hours a day with little sleep and food means that you will pay for that extra time by needing days in bed. So with the help of friends, I'm trying to take that extra moment to breathe a little and chill. </p>
<p>Since its America's day of independence, I wanted to share with you a few things I've experienced and found to be a "culture shock". </p>
<p>Today I held my first gun... Yes, I freaked out like a little girl as I held it with two fingers as far away from my body like it was a mouldy sandwich I use to pick out of my school bag. I'm sure my sheltered upbringing was amusing to watch, mainly coming from a country where guns aren't kept in the bedside drawer or stashed in a closet. My friend then got out his machine gun, and I was lost somewhere in awe and shock. I still can't believe that's "normal". </p>
<p>I had my first "Cracker Barrell" experience, where my friends described it to be just like "grandma's cooking". As we walked up to the restaurant, I noticed banners of red, white and blue hanging down from off the awning of a porch that was filled with rocking chairs and occupied by hungry guests waiting to be seated. </p>
<p>"Grandma's cooking" consisted of meat loaf, chicken dumplings, corn, biskets and gravy, country ham, mac & cheese, chicken fried chicken and grits.... Yes, I hope my Aussie readers are just as confused as I was. It turns out it's confirmed, American taste buds are in a league of their own. </p>
<p>I keep a pocket knife in my car and mace in my hand and I walk streets alone at night and ask my friends to watch me as I walk a couple of houses down to visit another friend. It's a strange consciousness and something very different from traveling Australia alone playing shows and feeling very safe. </p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/eb6a7b95e405c0bcfd6dec2d6f4d02a529219aa3/original/screen-shot-2018-05-29-at-11-43-12-am.png/!!/b:W10=.png" class="size_l justify_center border_" />On an endearing note, I've never been so respected or treated so sweetly by a gentleman. In the last few months, I have had doors opened for me, I've been walked to my car, I've felt genuinely cared for without a man trying to skip to 3rd base and must commend American Mommas for raising their sons right... I've also learnt how to two-step. <br>This month I attended my first CMA festival, saw Blake Shelton play a song at a local bar in <br>Midtown, played my first show down on Broadway, watched my first Stanley Cup, did a full band studio demo with 2 songs, saw the release of a first major label single for my Nashville Dad Marty Morgan with Aaron Lewis Folded Flag with Big Machine Records, reached 10k followers on facebook and "totally pulled off" wearing red cowboy boots (Ted Mosby- How I Met Your Mother). </p>
<p>They say that home is where the heart is, and Nashville has branded its mark on mine. I can dance to my own music. I feel alive and lit up every day. I have found so many incredible friends and family here. I spoke to my mum on the phone last week and said, "you know I'm never coming home, I'm going to grow old here". </p>
<p>The Stars And Stripes have changed my life forever. I left Nashville with nothing but a fire in my belly in 2015. </p>
<p>I've never been so broke in my life. I spent $10k on a 3 months trip. Sold all my guitars and my banjo, a computer... everything I could spare. Packed up everything into a storage unit. Walk 6 miles to a co-write while the glue in my shoes melted at the 100-degree heat and ate toast and $2 tacos for 3 weeks.... </p>
<p>I landed on Australian shores on October 20, 2015 with less than $100 to my name and a little wish.. To call NASHVILLE my home... </p>
<p>I still pinch myself that this came true.</p>Katrina Burgoynetag:katrinaburgoyne.com,2005:Post/52640752018-05-29T16:46:19-05:002018-05-29T16:46:19-05:00Whole<p>It's a Saturday, I'm curled up on my comforter with throw rug over me, my MacBook on my lap and today's co-write stuck in rotation in my head. </p>
<p>This week I've been hit hard with allergies, but it hasn't slowed me down. My days have been consisting of arriving at my first co-write at 10am and walking through the door to get home at midnight. </p>
<p>I attended my first no.1 party since moving here, celebrating Dustin Lynch's "Seeing Red". I will have played 7 shows by the time I wrap up my last gig tonight and traveled 2 states, and will have sat through 6 co-writes after tomorrow. </p>
<p>Well... am I allowed to say it...? </p>
<p>After months of sad posts about missing home and feeling sorry for myself.... </p>
<p>I FREAKING LOVE YOU NASHVILLE... I FEEL MORE AT HOME THEN I'VE EVER FELT... EVER!! </p>
<p>For the first time I feel like I have found "my tribe", a community of people I love and adore right in my neighborhood. Touching souls with precious people in Australia has seen my beloved ones scattered like lost jewels across our landscape, but in Nashville we are all the same. The slightly fragile, deep thinkers, courageously putting our hearts on our sleeves to be hated, liked or loved as we share pieces of ourself to the world as we boldly dare to dream. </p>
<p>Over the past few weeks I've spend a few days in Florida at the Key West Songwriters Festival. On a budget we stayed in possibly the most dirtiest backpackers hostel I've ever stayed in, although if you ask my Irish friend Warren it wasn't too bad. Although he was found most mornings sleeping on the deck chair with his hat still on his head as he never made it to bed. </p>
<p>Life moves on, and it's funny I not only have closed a chapter on my Australian life. I have completely started a new book. The only thing I miss is my Mum but like everything else, we both have our own paths now and home doesn't feel that far away. </p>
<p>I'm so proud of the work I've been producing. I really am starting to see some major growth and getting the wheels in motion here in the USA. </p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/f541fd8b7c173a46e8ce8e636e05a689fcdc7c74/original/screen-shot-2018-05-29-at-4-45-37-pm.png/!!/b:W1sic2l6ZSIsIm1lZGl1bSJdXQ==.jpg" class="size_m justify_left border_" />Reflecting on life until this moment I feel like it's all tested me for this point. I don't think I would have been ready to move to the other side of the world without finding my own strength. The last four and a half months were incredibly hard. Grasping onto things that didn't serve me when everything felt so new and scary. I made a little wish before I left Australia. I wished that if it was going to hurt, make it hurt hard. Make me feel pain, I wanted to be tested to see how resilient I have become. I have lost 17 pounds since crossing the sea from stress and heartache. However, my resilience didn't let me down. I am past the blue, past the hurt, past the lost, past the fear and I feel amazing, I have got a fire on my tail, a song in my head and so much gratitude in my heart. </p>
<p>One of my co-writers said after feeling frustrated one day "I think it's all just an illusion, its all a dream, that big hit song, it's not real". I stopped and thought about it. I remember the people that rolled their eyes at me when I said I was moving to Nashville. I had no money, I had no idea how I was going to make it happen. All I had was a "knowing", I knew deeper than I've ever known anything that I would be moving to Nashville. So I commited to it. For 3 years I woke up, every step I took was to lead me to Nashville. I thought about it every second and worked towards it every day. As my friend continued on about never reaching "the dream" I pulled him up and said... "This is the dream isnt it?". </p>
<p>I've spent a lot of my life thinking "I'll be happy when....". I'm such a driven person that my "when" is like a goal post that moves every time my goal gets bigger. My goal is to own my first house in 3 years time and have a 6 figure profit. As I sit here and write with a flutter in my heart I reflect on telling my co-writer... "This is the dream isn't it? We get to do what we love every day, we have opportunity in our arms reach, there are no more obstacles, there is no reason why we don't have a good chance of achieving what we desire. This is magic, this is the dream". </p>
<p>Every day my spirit gets to dance in its own made up melody. My soul feels like it's being topped up. It's a strange feeling when you have everything you need and crave. After so many years of feeling broken, lost and misunderstood, I finally feel full, like nothing is missing anymore. I feel like I am a better version of me because I am truly more whole than I've ever felt before.</p>Katrina Burgoynetag:katrinaburgoyne.com,2005:Post/52640502018-05-29T16:44:52-05:002021-02-17T19:28:17-06:00With Brave Wings She Flies<p>I'm currently sitting in a car traveling through Kentucky, absent-minded and lost in thoughts and heartache. My travel companion Candy jumps into the car and gives me a braclet she just bought me saying "With brave wings she flies". </p>
<p>As I sit down to write this blog, I must warn that my energy is rather negative at the moment. I've had a marathon week navigating my way through deceit, bullies and cheats coming to a conclusion that when other core values don't align with mine, I need to remove them from my life and friends list. Ultimately taking a big exhale as I release dead weight and as enticing as it is to write a blog consumed by these unworthy people I stop myself right here... because these people don't deserve any more of my time. </p>
<p>Today to reward myself for getting out of this situation half sane I bought a ticket to Florida, yes I'm taking a holiday to Key West for the Songwriters Festival in two weeks. The sun, the sand, incredibly talented songwriters, cocktails and connecting with equally driven, successful and inspiring go-getters as I soak up creativity with some of my best new buddies. </p>
<p>The last month has been great; my little business is blooming. From writing 3-5 days a week, meetings, shows and playing for tips. I have spent two weeks of the month on a radio tour with Nebraska born and raised Candy Fernaux. We traveled through Alabama, Tennessee, Georgia, Kentucky, Indiana and Virgina. Our adventures range from chasing an Amish man, visiting Loretta Lyn's childhood home, FAME studios, hiding from Tornados to long drives across this beautiful country I've never seen before. </p>
<p>Loretta Lynn and Crystal Gayle's childhood home </p>
<p>Candy's savvy business mind with over 12 years of business owner experience in credit card processing with "Card Diva". Her drive completely fascinated me insisting that my time with her would be equivalent to a $1000 weekend business retreat. I've walked away setting a little goal for myself to purchase my first house in 3 years here in Nashville and crack a 6 figure profit. </p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/7248a8b6eb4e03c4b66bcce00b868fc551a7ac61/original/screen-shot-2018-05-29-at-4-43-58-pm.png/!!/b:W1sic2l6ZSIsIm1lZGl1bSJdXQ==.jpg" class="size_m justify_left border_" /> My spiritual life and personal life have kind of taken a back seat. I've spent the last few months trying to survive and pay rent and adjusting to this new world, grounding me from feeling connected to above. I've always been aware of the presence of my grandmother who I talk to every day, although this last week I've felt so hurt and alone from a heartbreak that for the first time in the longest time I got on my knees and prayed to God. Feeling so far from home and helpless I really believe faith is the only way I can pave a path forward. </p>
<p>My personal life consisted of a phone call home every evening, I would feel guilty to spend my money on anything other than my business, besides a one-time movie ticket or a $5 bottle of wine on my birthday. My friends are so forgiving when I trade in an evening hanging with them in exchange to go home and call Australia. </p>
<p>I've had some incredible publishing meetings and I've sat behind doors that alot of writers strive for years to walk through. I've decided to dedicate this next month to me. Greiving ghosts and my life in Australia one last time and surendering myself to the universe trusting that there is a reason for everything. </p>
<p>Music is all I have, I feel like everything I touch that isnt music turns to ash in my hands. I feel the greatest sense of defeat in my personal life, I'm still speachless, still shoked, still numb. However the constent reminder that there is only one way forward and thats just to do me and follow my music path. </p>
<p>"With brave wings she flies".</p>Katrina Burgoynetag:katrinaburgoyne.com,2005:Post/52640492018-05-29T16:43:32-05:002018-05-29T16:43:32-05:00Snow In The Spring Time<p>It's 12:13 am, the only time of the day where I can feel the magic in my fingers, songs in my head or a tangle of words, scrambled like a "barrel of monkeys" crying out to be free. </p>
<p>Kris Bradley debuting at the Blue Bird Cafe </p>
<p>I slide into my generously comfortable bed overflowing with inspiration, after capping off a long week of five days of songwriting and six shows by supporting my housemate making her debut at the "Blue Bird Cafe". </p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/5f75e70e2b7d058e7eaf2475d1d4243cc0c254c8/original/screen-shot-2018-05-29-at-4-42-49-pm.png/!!/b:W10=.png" class="size_l justify_center border_" />Every day something incredible happens in this town, I still pinch myself. At the Blue Bird, tonight humbly sat Nashville Songwriters Hall of Fame member, Tony Arata who is best known for writing the Garth Brookes hit "The Dance" as he watched the talented writers. Wednesday, I played my regular spot at "The Row", and I was followed by Grammy nominee "John Berry" who performed his 1994 no.1 hit "Your Love Amazes Me." One of my dear friend's daughter is personal assistance for Vince Gill and Brad Pasley. Nichole Kidman is regularly spotted at Green Hills Mall, where I frequently window shop. And the list goes on and on, I sit here and think how cool it is to be on my path following so many people I admire and aspire to achieve similar goals. </p>
<p>The last month has been a constant burn. Lots of writing, lots of gigging. I flew to Texas last week for an audition as I sat on the runway in Nashville at 7 am praying we would be safe as the rest of the town bunkered down in their basements from a tornado touching down. </p>
<p>Gina Venier and I in Kentucky </p>
<p>Last weekend I road tripped to Kentucky to watch my Aussie sisters Dozzi and audition for the venue they were playing with one of my favorite people Gina Venier. </p>
<p>OK, I fell asleep... here is my second attempt at writing this blog. </p>
<p>Emotionally I feel like I am back to being "me". It was a hard few weeks, but finally, I have worked through the withdrawals of missing home. </p>
<p>I woke up this morning to the first time I've ever seen snow fall from the sky today. I had to go straight to Facebook live and share it with Australia, so jump on my facebook to see me light up and buzzing like a child with a mouth full of cotton candy. </p>
<p>I have sold out of all the CD I brought with me to the USA over 150 CD's sold in just seven weeks. I want to thank everyone who has come to my shows and have been supporting me. </p>
<p>This month on the 10th of March I celebrated 6 years since the release of my debut album. White Flag released 3 top ten charting singles, hit no.11 on the ARIA chart and was nominated for 2 Golden Guitar Awards. </p>
<p>Although it's been a long time between drinks, I am so grateful to invest this time into writing and de <br>veloping. Living in an instant market where so much music comes out every day and musicians now having the ability to record in their bedroom it's so hard to not get lost in the noise of "another artists". I am still unsure what my future is as an artist. However, I know the next time I release I hope it's at a whole new level and a cut above the noise and can really resonate with people. </p>
<p>Yesterday I did the maths and have been writing songs for 18 years and coming up to 10 years being a full-time musician in May. I am so blessed to do what I do, even when I feel like it's been a burden at times. Moving over the other side of the world I purely make my income from tips and CD sales. It's pushed me to be a better performer, I am loving this whole new challenge of survival as I connect with people from across the USA. </p>
<p>Also to wrap up my blog I want to take a moment to thank my Facebook supporters this week we cracked 9 thousand followers. I believe creating music and building a fan base is like a pyramid scheme, one person tells another person and so on. So thank you for sharing, liking, commenting and being so supportive. </p>
<p>I love you guys so much, I feel so lucky to not be walking this path alone. Today I will be editing another video blog so please keep an eye out for the new blog coming soon. xx</p>Katrina Burgoynetag:katrinaburgoyne.com,2005:Post/52640472018-05-29T16:42:09-05:002018-05-29T16:42:09-05:00Open Heart<p>It's currently 11:53 pm on a cold and rainy Valentines day. I tucked myself under my white comforter topped with a faux fur electric throw blanket, and finally, I sigh with a mix of emotions, "I'm ready to write now". </p>
<p>I usually publish my blog on the first Monday of the month. However, this month has seen so many changes. I didn't know where to start, and if I'm honest, I've been too scared to write. </p>
<p>In my personal life, I only let a handful of people get close to me. I'm somewhat guarded; it takes a long time and a lot of work for me to be vulnerable to friends and loved ones. My greatest form of vulnerability is writing; it's the only way I can let someone see inside my heart and stay at a safe distance, so they don't destroy me. I was once described as peanut brittle, hard on the outside but once softened I am warm and gooey. Writing has always been a direct path to the warm and gooey. </p>
<p>I titled this blog "Open Heart." I'm not sure where this will take me today, my emotions are raw and probably more vulnerable than I've ever felt when writing, this could be like placing my heart out on the operating table to be cut open and completely exposed. </p>
<p>One month ago exactly today I landed in Nashville Tenessee to begin the adventure of a lifetime. The one I dreamed of since I was a little girl. It was the beginning of a brand new day, seeing the sunshine for the first time in a new and different light. </p>
<p>My Aussie friends have warned me about "the six-week meltdown". It's a total grieving of missing home and everything you've left behind. It's almost like shedding another layer of yourself, from my experience last time I had a meltdown and wrote a song in tears called "I don't believe in love" after thinking I was being guided to Nashville to fall in love. Instead, I realised I wasn't meant to find love here but instead fall in love with Nashville. Although this time is different, it's for good. I'm here, and I don't have a ticket home. </p>
<p>I feel like the past four weeks has been one big emotional cocktail. The first week I was here I thought seriously about buying a ticket and going straight back home. I landed in the USA with the worst jet lag I've ever experienced. I also fell sick with a sinus infection and asthma and was stuck in bed for four days, alone and feeling sorry for myself. Leaving behind potentially the love of my life, after only seeing a vision of forever and how real our relationship was when he effortlessly become a part of my family over Christmas, in our final hours. </p>
<p>Walking around with the heaviest of hearts, anxiety, anger at why after all these years the universe placed someone in front of me now. It makes the sweet taste of being here in Nashville so bitter. </p>
<p>When I turn the light switch up to turn on a light, my consciousness reminds me I'm far away from home. When I go to get in the car door on the wrong side, I am reminded I'm far away from home. When I struggle to find food my taste buds can enjoy, I am reminded I'm far away from home. When I hold a handful of coins I don't understand their value to a cashier and ask "is this enough?", I am reminded I'm far away from home. When I sit in silence feeling overwhelmed by so much change and just need someone to talk to, and the other side of the world is sleeping I am reminded I am far away from home... and I'm all alone. </p>
<p>I think if I'm honest, my spirit has always asked for this kind of opportunity to grow. In the moments when I feel challenged emotionally that I look back with pride and think, gosh I'm such a stronger person because of that. I know my spirit is a fighter and its resilience to keep moving forward has been my greatest badge of honour. Trusting in fate brings me so much peace in knowing that everything happens the way it is meant to, no matter how broken I feel. </p>
<p>On the flip side, my soul feels like it's home. I've felt full of life and topped up with inspiration, creativity and the prospect of opportunity. I have a direction and a goal that I'm getting closer to the touch. </p>
<p>I've been so blessed to have been introduced to the kindest man called "Mike" who runs entertainment every night at "The Row" in midtown. He puts me on almost every night I'm free, and I play for tips. </p>
<p>After ten years of playing 3-5 shows a week in Australia, I think I have grown so much in the last four weeks. Playing for tips, working for my money and making genuine connections with people. I've never felt so fulfilled playing shows. The first time I played my song "Trying To Get To Georgia" you could hear a pin drop in a usually rowdy room, with 8-9 people videoing on their phone. "The Row" is a tourist destination and generally selling anywhere from 2-8 cd's a night, sometimes more. I'm collecting supporters from all over the USA. I am so blessed they have now become a part of my journey. </p>
<p>I got myself a little Nison Versa; I call her my "Little Wed Waggon". I'm making budget most weeks. I've become the best batch cooker of soups and stews that ever was, and I'm feeling optimistic about the future. </p>
<p>There is the hardest working homeless guy that sells papers on Eastland Ave. I've seen him standing in the rain, standing on days when it's 30•F and his always so positive with a big smile. I don't have much money, but I slip him a few dollars whenever I see him. He's been such an inspiration to me whenever I feel far from home or a little down his there smiling and proving that no matter what challenges we have, we always have the ability to smile through it. </p>
<p>So despite this broken heart, anxiety from all this change and the fear of the unknown... here I am smiling through it. Because I feel so incredibly lucky to firstly have felt that kind of love despite the hurt and secondly to be living out this dream and I know I have so much support and people who believe in me, even when I don't feel strong enough to do so myself. </p>
<p>So here I am, throw it at me universe. Here I go, stepping up to your challenge.<img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/20def175b1fd808cddc1377897c0d55c03f811ac/original/screen-shot-2018-05-29-at-4-41-31-pm.png/!!/b:W10=.png" class="size_l justify_center border_" /></p>Katrina Burgoynetag:katrinaburgoyne.com,2005:Post/52634452018-05-29T12:05:44-05:002021-04-21T12:13:55-05:00Reflections<p>The new year always seems to bring out the best in us. New start, new beginnings and a clean slate. This year I would like to get back on board with fitness and healthy eating, but I say that as I sit in a cafe eating a pastry while I wait for my mother's car to finish its service. I could have easily walked the 3km home. However, I'm here finding a refuge from the smouldering bitterly dry heat and just like that I create an excuse not to follow through on my better intention. </p>
<p>As I walked past our local park, I looked back at the community gatherings of Christmas carolers, concerts and cricket games I enjoyed as a little girl. I was thinking about some of the joys my hometown; Gunnedah has given me and made a little moment to breathe it in consciously. </p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/f394b0d1acad6e169a9a4a1cf1ec14aa7fa9ccb9/original/screen-shot-2018-05-29-at-11-55-43-am.png/!!/b:W10=.png" class="size_l justify_center border_" /> 2016 was one of the easiest years for me to get through. It was bland and work based as I focused on saving hard and preparing to move to the USA. It was like a slow incline up a steep slope, with no sign of an avalanche (Thank God). In contrast to other years, it was effortless. </p>
<p>2016 I started with very little money to my name, a car loan and two maxed out credit cards. Knuckling down, consolidating my debt and putting myself in the position to start seeing the results of savings was the first big victory for me. </p>
<p>My mum took me in giving me a place to live in Gunnedah. I've spent the last 14 months driving backwards and forwards to Newcastle on weekends to play gigs. Sleeping in a spare room at my Brothers house until he moved and then staying on friends couches and any bed I could find. </p>
<p>When I left Nashville in Oct 2015, my friend (and soon to be housemate) Kris Bradley suggested that I make an album to raise money for me to collect funds for my USA VISA. So in March 2016, I launched the campaign and WOW... what a response. Not only did the campaign raise $6,500 but I feel like now this Nashville journey isn't just mine anymore, it's yours too. <br>I hit the studio and recorded eight tracks I wrote in my three months in Nashville in 2015. Michael Muchow producing our 3rd project together and gosh I'm proud of it. On the smallest budget known to man, I swapped my time and skills (Graphic Design, Film, Photography, etc.) in exchange for production. We traded cows for chickens and together created something pretty special. This is when I reaffirm, nothing is impossible no matter how little money you have. Nashville Mini Album will only be available for purchase until January 9. </p>
<p>July, reality TV called once again when I was on X-factor. Three "yes's" from the judges but was dropped after boot camp when they turned 100 people into 20 people. I didn't make the editors cut, but it was eye-opening to know that I need to work on my flirting skills. </p>
<p>Being prone to what I thought was the fortnightly flu. I came to learn that I have bad sinus issues. Performing just over 50 shows and recording an album over four months worth of sinus infections. I was burnt out and run down. </p>
<p>In August I sold my baby, my Rav 4. So for the last four months, I've been driving my mothers run around Toyota Camry that she brought so I could sell my car and have a car to drive. Mum has only ever driven the car for 1-2 weeks on her one hour commute to work. I am currently getting all the broken bits fixed so she can enjoy her new car, finally. Yes, I am so lucky to have a mum like mine. </p>
<p>September couldn't have come any quicker; I held my breath for my USA VISA to be approved and arrive safely for me to fly out September 7th. As the 7th come and gone, my heart broke a little. I missed my climax; I fell into a slump of unknowing and felt lost. </p>
<p>If you can't laugh at yourself, your taking life to seriously. </p>
<p>By this stage, I was so worn out and exhausted from a jam-packed year that I found myself crying over bacon and eggs. My Mum didn't know what to do or how to react, as it was a lot like the youtube video of a brother asking his younger sister "have you had your nap today?". So she burst out laughing and took a photo. </p>
<p>By the end of September, I realised that I had fallen in love with a Tamworth local musician. Kyle and I had started dating in April; I had hardly any time for him, catching up once a week if that. His attempts at my affection would leave him days waiting for a text message reply. Me telling him to leave me alone (multiple times) until finally I stopped in September to just be still for a moment, and I realised he somehow crept into my subconsciousness and engraved his claim on a piece of my heart. I've never met a man so patient and determined to give his heart to me. </p>
<p>Deciding to change my move date to January 14, was one of the best decisions I made. Giving myself time to breathe, refresh and build a little more financial security in savings. Spending time with family has reminded me of how focused I've been on work, neglecting relationships. But just like the best friendships, connecting is simple when there is genuine love. </p>
<p>I've gone back to studying, social media marketing just to fill my mind with more incredible ways to connect with people. </p>
<p>Christmas was magic with over 25 of us gathering to celebrate. I've never drunkenly giggled so hard over eating cookies and carrots in the name of Santa, failing at flying a kite, my grandfather who finds it hard to speak loud enough to be heard was singing for the first time in the longest time. Kyle fit in effortlessly with my family. Our bellies were big, and the children were jolly. Despite accommodation mix-ups and a breakdown on the Dorrigo range, it was an incredible adventure in Coffs Harbour. </p>
<p>I love this crazy bunch of misfits. </p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/dfe4d011b406d6c89cd9825c1517a87b3f24da24/original/screen-shot-2018-05-29-at-12-04-14-pm.png/!!/b:W1sic2l6ZSIsIm1lZGl1bSJdXQ==.jpg" class="size_m justify_left border_" />New years was spent with my Step Dad in Darling Harbour watching the most spectacular display of fireworks I have ever seen. It's a MUST SEE bucket list kind of thing. </p>
<p>As I wrap up my Aussie life here and fly out in just a few short days, I'm so excited to share this adventure with everyone. This year I'll be starting a new youtube series v-logging my experiences in Nashville, with tonnes of fresh new content coming. <br>Over the last few years, my supporters have always been a united front helping me through things, encouraging me and been people I can confide in. I've created "Katrina Burgoyne United" where I will re-visit reaching out via email. By signing up you will receive a FREE SONG and exclusive content just for you sent to you inbox once a month.</p>Katrina Burgoynetag:katrinaburgoyne.com,2005:Post/52634442018-05-29T12:03:11-05:002018-05-29T12:03:11-05:00A Tortured Soul<p>As I count down my last six weeks as an Australian resident, I am packing bags, sorting out what is important to take and what isn't. I am so excited and blessed to go on this new journey moving to Nashville, TN. </p>
<p>I have found a place to live; have my furniture in a shopping cart online ready to buy and be delivered when its closer to the date. I've never actually bought furniture in Australia besides from a chest of draws. I couldn't commit to it, strange how things work out. </p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/02fb8c554395765a24b29b57cd647e6761222dac/original/screen-shot-2018-05-29-at-12-02-38-pm.png/!!/b:W10=.png" class="size_l justify_center border_" />Most things are set into place, apart from me packing absolutely everything I own into boxes, as my mother moves houses in just a few months. I've decided I'm going to create a youtube series in video blog form about living in Nashville. I'm starting to collect emails for my mailing list if you would like to jump on board and get an email notification of new music and events coming to your area, email sign up in at the bottom of this post. </p>
<p>Also this month my blog reaches one year! Thank you so much for those of you who have followed my journey and been apart of this exciting year with me. I LOVE YOU SO MUCH. </p>
<p>As I love to write, here is a little page of thoughts I weaved together for this month's blog. As I have no exciting adventures to share with you apart from my philosophies and beliefs until I jet off, here is my little cluster of words for this month. </p>
<p><strong>A Tortured Soul </strong></p>
<p>Sitting in a crowded bar scattered with men dressed in orange high visibility shirts scoffing down their $12 schnitzel and chips on a cheap eats Wednesday in my local town of Gunnedah. An old school friend bounces through the patchwork of fluorescent and plain dressed patrons like a beam of light. Her smile was illuminating her face, her body language open, honest and welcoming. Watching the way she moved lit a little spark in me, her energy was almost magnetic. I wrapped her up in a big hug, and we shared stories about our life since we last crossed paths, and her story stayed with me. </p>
<p>She has been walking down a dark corridor guided by only her fingertips reading the crevices in the plasterboard like a map, lost still not knowing where she belongs. Stopping to a halt, she traces her way around a freshly painted frame. It's a door, an opportunity, a way forward and she turns the knob. As soft as a kiss on the lips, the hinges glide open, to the promise of a divine adventure. But like the sun flickering through threatening clouds, that whisper of hope fades in the wind. As the door slams closed, she continues fumbling in the dark once more, a perfect opportunity for self doubt creeps in. She could listen to the voices in her mind saying "just give up" but instead she continues on, having faith that her inner compass will lead her to where she is meant to be. </p>
<p>When all paths forward disappear and I'm feeling trapped, lost and I'm batteling with demons, I truely believe it is my soul awakening, saying "Hey you, listen here". I think the negative self-talk and mental challenges in this process is just our bodies way of reacting. Just like a baby starts to kick in one's tummy. My tortured soul does the same "I'm ready to be unleashed now". </p>
<p>I believe throughout our lifetime we are given divine hints about our life's purpose. It may be a special talent that we are drawn to as a young child, an interest in learning something. It's that strong pull like our spirit is dragging us in like a current. However, I believe if the talent is unneutered it may move on to someone else, and then we feel lost once again. </p>
<p>This is when I come to the part where I say, a way forward is by going within. I spend this time re-discovering my strengths and celebrate them, discover my weaknesses and work on them. I believe that we truely have the power to achieve and be a model of the person we desire to be. It comes down to mental self-discipline. </p>
<p>Being at a stand still in life is nothing to be afraid of. Over the last few years, it's been the times when I've been sitting and waiting for a new path to open that I learnt the most about myself. I've discovered new talents like photography and drawing. I had an affair with myself; I would make time to be alone and learn more about the person I am. </p>
<p>But it's also important to listen when a door cracks open and waits for you to notice. Something as simple as an email from Nashville in August 2014, was what guided me on my journey to move across the planet. </p>
<p>I believe the greatest gift one could ever ask for is a tortured soul; this means our subconsciousness is crying out for a change and to evolve. How lucky are we to be prompted to do so.</p>Katrina Burgoynetag:katrinaburgoyne.com,2005:Post/52634432018-05-29T12:01:58-05:002020-09-08T03:25:32-05:00Evolution<p>I woke up from somewhere between a dream and a nightmare last week. My skin with clammy with sweat, my heart accelerating as if I was running from the memories flickering in my head. "I don't want to move to the USA," my dream leaving one last whisper in my mind as I come to the realisation that I was laying in my bed. </p>
<p>Between organising international health insurance, researching banks, cars, rental properties. Budgeting for moving countries and diving into "income unknown" in less than ten short weeks. I find myself overwhelmed and before I can catch a tear escaping from the corner of my almond shape eye's, I start sobbing. "I don't want to move to the USA." </p>
<p>I LOVE Australia, apart of me wishes I wasn't self-aware enough to hear my calling and feel my spirit pushing and pulling in its unsettled slumber, begging me, forcing me to make this change in my life. </p>
<p>I believe our purpose here on earth is to live on and evolve. We are in such fear of feeling uncomfortable. We're taught that security is safety, so we rarely feel bold enough to venture far from home, challenging the way we have been "conditioned" from religion to education and social structure, giving us little room to evolve mentally and spiritually beyond our last generation. </p>
<p>Growing up in Gunnedah our primary industry is agriculture and coal mining. The energy that washes across the small town is one of masculinity. A "cultured" evening out tasting Gunnedah's finest food and beverages would mean sitting down to a large mouth watering steak with pepper sauce, chips and a garden salad overflowing your plate and washing it down with a schooner of beer. </p>
<p>The females from Gunnedah are strong, independent "do it them self" kind of girls. I often get reminded of our masculine qualities when I spend time with my city girlfriends. I think growing up driven by the femininity of self-expression and creativity; I always felt an out of place sense of discomfort in Gunnedah, but still it is my safety net. </p>
<p>We stand back in awe as we "champion" the people who were willing enough to step out from their comforts and evolve beyond their conditions. </p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/21583037b6d7e4970a03aa33222f33dc5ee2e390/original/screen-shot-2018-05-29-at-12-01-33-pm.png/!!/b:W10=.png" class="size_l justify_center border_" />Oprah Winfrey, was only an African-American girl, from the south. Born daughter to a teen mum with little money, tossed from house to house. She was sexually abused by family members, fell pregnant at 14 to her abuser, her child died in infancy and lost her sister to cocaine. We know Oprah today as one of the most influential people of western culture and is currently North America's first and only multi-billionaire black person. </p>
<p>We never seem to defend or believe in ourselves enough that we have the power and ability to be one of those people. The discomfort of going against the grain, "shaking off" eye rolls and people telling us we can't... well guess what... I believe we can! </p>
<p>Evolution takes time; it's a marathon, a discipline dedication and a life long mantra, it has become a part of my spirituality and faith. </p>
<p>Fame, money and stuff has never been a motivator for me. I would love to own a house one day and have the things that I need without the worry of money. I believe I will achieve that in my own time and way. If it's in Nashville, Gunnedah or where ever I end up. I hope that I continue to make evolution and growth my no.1 investment. </p>
<p>My lifetime goal is nothing more than to gaze down at my old wrinkled hands passing on the knowledge I have gained in this lifetime to the ones I love and encourage them never to be afraid of growing. Fly, soar, and best of all evolve. </p>
<p>There is a great paragraph I love from the book "Think And Grow Rich" by Napoleon Hill discussing a long list of excuses why we never push harder to achieve our goals or grow. "If only I had the money", "If only I started when I was younger", "If only I was good enough". Ultimately he sums it up with this one last excuse, I hope this one resonates with you as much as it did with me. </p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em>“IF - and this is the greatest of them all - I had the courage to see myself as I really am, I would find out what is wrong with me, and correct it, then I might have a chance to profit by my mistakes and learn something from the experience of others, for I know that there is something WRONG with me, or I would now be where I WOULD HAVE BEEN IF I had spent more time analyzing my weaknesses, and less time building alibis to cover them.” <br>― Napoleon Hill, Think and Grow Rich</em></p>Katrina Burgoynetag:katrinaburgoyne.com,2005:Post/52633882018-05-29T12:00:40-05:002018-05-29T12:00:40-05:00The Head And The Heart<p style="text-align: center;"><em>The Head is stately, calm and wise, <br>And bears a princely part, <br>While down below in secret lies <br>The warm, impulsive heart. <br>- John Godfrey Saxe</em> </p>
<p>This blog today is for the free spirits. The ones that no matter how hard we try to go about our day to day, week to week, month to month we still feel that vortex pulling at us, niggling at our hearts. That inner child craving to discover a new world of adventure saying "let's go now." The logic of security and structure almost feels like iron prison bars clanging as they close around us, leaving nothing but a ghost of an echo in our minds. </p>
<p>Growing up in this structured society I have always felt gravitated to the "out of the box" thinkers. The wild and free that believe in the unknown, the ones that are not afraid to dream and follow their heart despite all logic and sense. </p>
<p>For me, I have lived and breathed an "all or nothing" approach to life, and at times I have been left with nothing. Stacking up my chips and betting on the wrong horse. But that's life, isn't it? Despite all setbacks we all still have to wake up in the morning and put one foot in front of the other to talk a step forward. </p>
<p>There is nothing more challenging for me then the feeling of being chained down. Sometimes it's been a negative person in my inner circle that steals my energy rather than tops me up. In the past, it has been a lack of finance restraining me, mental health shackling my feet to the ground so I can't fly. </p>
<p>After learning the importance of self-discipline, I have come to discover that it is us who holds the key to unlocking those chains. We are never helpless; it's only our mind telling us we are. </p>
<p>This month the black dog paid a little visit. It has been a while since I felt its presence sniffing at my ankles, subconsciously feeding it before I even become aware. My chest tight with anxiety, like a balloon almost about to burst. To relax and be "yin" has been near impossible. </p>
<p>Caught up in the processing on US immigrations my arms have been reaching out to grasp a hold of my USA VISA. My fingertips could almost feel it in my hands but still waiting touch it. It has been like holding my breath for 2 minutes and then being told you have to wait a little longer before you can breathe (ok, maybe not that dramatic). But to me, my life had become eerily still, but my mind wouldn't settle. </p>
<p>One evening my mother was cooking dinner, and I was walking in circles in the dining room. She asked, "what are you looking for?". </p>
<p>I paused, confused, I said: "What?" </p>
<p>She said, "You're walking round and round in circles, what are you looking for?". </p>
<p>I looked up at her and said "I'm sorry, I didn't even realise I was doing that. I just feel lost". </p>
<p>Topped with tears, anger, frustration and a short fuse I saw parts of my younger undisciplined spirit rise and make herself known. </p>
<p>I'm not sure if I felt the energy of someone sifting through my life judging me if I was eligible to work in the USA. But the day after my darker side had peeked I finally got take that breath, my USA VISA was approved and last Wednesday I travelled to Sydney where I was finally granted my 01 working visa in the USA. </p>
<p>To be jumping on a plan this week to make a move to Nashville would give me so much joy and fulfilment. It would ignite my heart into a million flames fueled by passion, lust, desire and my deep love of music. It's been a 5-year process of personal battles, financial setbacks and a hell of a lot of bravery. </p>
<p>My plan was to fly home for Christmas and get my last fix of a big family gathering before I leave for at least 12 months. I know that when I jump on that plane, I can't turn back around. My life in Australia will never be the same again. My soul has already been touched by a place that understands me, ignites me and fills me to the brim. I can't imagine trading that in without feeling like a part of me is missing. </p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/a026cec727a97c441551c5c05614c1e23860337c/original/screen-shot-2018-05-29-at-11-59-31-am.png/!!/b:W1sic2l6ZSIsIm1lZGl1bSJdXQ==.jpg" class="size_m justify_center border_" />In knowing that, I have decided to stay in Australia until after Christmas and to make my move early January. To spend this time no longer working towards my visa but spent making more lasting memories with the ones that I love. Spending more time with my Grandfather will be a highlight, I've made a new best friend who has given me the first taste of sweetness in many years and silly moments with my cousins will always be my childhood favourite. </p>
<p>But, like a double-edged sword whatever path I take moving forward my heart will feel sliced with a sharpened blade. I understand now why I needed to go through depression and why I had to learn how strong and determined my mind can be. I know in my heart, and in my head, this is the journey I need to take. </p>
<p>Despite the ones I love who I leave behind my mind keeps whispering "Keep going, you can do this".</p>Katrina Burgoynetag:katrinaburgoyne.com,2005:Post/52633872018-05-29T11:58:53-05:002021-02-01T17:55:18-06:00Making Time To Breathe<p>To splash on this blank page incredible stories of the last few months, it would look something like a minimalist piece of art. Between life on the road, living out of a suitcase and four months worth of sinus infections last week I finally come to a pause. I broke down, helpless, burnt out and exhausted, I cried. </p>
<p>Coming to the end of two extremely hard working years to make moving to the USA a reality I've spent the last few months focusing on deadlines to ensure I have no loose ends left before I fly out. I feel like I have run a marathon for months, and I've almost crossed the finish line. As burnt out as I feel I have to keep going. </p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/14fc58996b03de85f4f53a0ea6ed0212764b484e/original/screen-shot-2018-05-29-at-11-58-24-am.png/!!/b:W1sic2l6ZSIsIm1lZGl1bSJdXQ==.jpg" class="size_m justify_left border_" />Thankfully life has a funny way of giving you exactly what you need, and in my case, it is a forced holiday. </p>
<p>My dream was to see myself fly out this week, ticket in my hand, my big, ambitious heart beating in my chest full of love and enthusiasm for my brand new home, Nashville. However, I am still waiting for my visa to finish processing and in all honesty, I am grateful. </p>
<p>In these last months, I've forgotten to make time to breathe. Now completing gigs, I won't be on the road so that I can nurture my body with some great nutritional foods and be mentally and physically healthy ready for the move, which would be a fabulous contrast from the last few months. </p>
<p>My life has become so yang and for this soulful creative, I feel a buzz in my body. It's like a tingle from head to toe that tells me I need to stop, breath and "yin out" for a little bit. My spare time I read business books or something educational, so I can fill my mind with knowledge to apply it to my life. My hyper focussed personality proves to be hard to relax and just enjoy the moment, but I'm trying. </p>
<p>Today my Nashville Album is due to be delivered, and I can't wait to see a real life copy. I'm excited to send out over 150 copies to the beautiful people who have joined me on this journey. This week I'll be licking postage stamps, signing and writing little love notes. This is one of the most joyful parts of the whole process. </p>
<p>I have 80 copies left, so don't miss out on this one-off print and exclusive album. Head on over to my shop. </p>
<p>Keeping it short and sweet this month I just want to say a big thank you to the ones who have been reading and following my journey. I can't wait to share this new adventure with you. I love you lots and lots. </p>
<p>Kat x</p>Katrina Burgoynetag:katrinaburgoyne.com,2005:Post/52633852018-05-29T11:57:28-05:002018-05-29T11:57:28-05:00I Believe<p>I often get pulled up by a lot by my friends for being condescending and a little arrogant. My self-righteous belief that we can achieve whatever we want is often the mortar in the concrete that holds the bricks to a very secure a sturdy foundation of my belief system. </p>
<p>I lack sympathy when people tell me the reasons why they can't achieve what they want to. After explaining a list of options or ideas on how to form a way forward and hearing a reason why those options are not possible. I often end up throwing my arms in the air and walk away with an opinion of "they just don't want it bad enough". This is usually the point when my arrogance gets me into trouble. </p>
<p>I believe that our greatest roadblock is our mind. After my mind had paralysed me for so damn long with excuses of why I should "just give up", (I didn't have the finance, the network, someone to believe in me and I was afraid). To see ones that I love with the same challenges makes me want to shake them until their insecurities and fears drop to the ground like pennies until their pockets are empty, and they no longer have that extra weight holding them down. </p>
<p>I believe that we all have a profound purpose. A core value of what an achievement will mean to us. I write songs and chase this dream because I have discovered that I simply "can not". My life is miserable without me asserting my type A personality, living for music, continuing to find my voice, connecting with people. As scared, hard and hurtful as this journey can be for me, life is easier doing it then to not. </p>
<p>Motivation to get work done is sometimes incredibly hard, but I know that every day is a step closer to towards another significant achievement. I set goals on a daily basis and I work and walk towards them. </p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/1e071a0453086bc762b9abd1974c2b4a7722cd6e/original/screen-shot-2018-05-29-at-11-56-54-am.png/!!/b:W1sic2l6ZSIsIm1lZGl1bSJdXQ==.jpg" class="size_m justify_left border_" />My other goals are to become a better cook, learn the importance of nutrition, eat better, run daily and do yoga a couple of times a week. All of which I can give you a long list of excuses as to why I quickly fall off the bandwagon. It's too cold to run, I'm exhausted, I'm living on the road 3 days a week its hard to have good food . The truth is, these values and goals are not ingrained into my core (yet). They are not yet a part of my purpose. They are still "wants" rather than "needs". However being prone to the fortnightly flu these values are actively becoming more significant. </p>
<p>I believe that self-awareness is our greatest guide. The universe, God, fate will push us to exactly where we are meant to be. This is when my unforgiving reasoning needs a check in, from time to time. We are all on our own path, and we need to be gentle with one another and ourselves. Life continues to change, and our priorities change too. </p>
<p>Whether you have a child, financial strain, and other roadblocks that challenge you from reaching your goals. I do believe it is important to reconnect once again with our core purpose. Is your dream a "want" or a "need"? How important is achieving this goal to you? How will this make you feel? </p>
<p>If it's saving to buy a house, becoming a sports star, an inspiring kindergarten teacher, whatever your dream is. Here is a little kind reminder that it just takes time. Small achievements turn into big kick ass results. </p>
<p>Creating a habit is easy if you can find joy in celebrating the little things like, "I just sent an important email, GO ME!". It doesn't feel like work to me, it feels like the beginning of a great adventure every day. </p>
<p>As I conclude, I apologise for my unforgiving beliefs. I don't think there is such thing as "I can't". I believe that within all of us we have the potential to be greater. I believe that our purpose is to evolve, to push ourselves and to grow. I think that we have the capabilities of creating a life that we want when we are willing to make sacrifices, create strategies and put a plan into place. I believe knowledge is key and that we can do anything we desire if we are hungry enough to seek the tools we need in order to grow. </p>
<p>Big love, Kat x</p>Katrina Burgoynetag:katrinaburgoyne.com,2005:Post/52633842018-05-29T11:56:24-05:002018-05-29T11:56:24-05:00Making Peace With Peace<p>I’m currently writing from a chilled train carriage. Dressed in my blacked knitted poncho with my thick fluffy, woolen, winter coat over my lap. My headphones nestled in my ear playing calm meditation music, drowning the chatter and screams of joy from the children in the seat ahead of me and the rustles of chip packets reminding me I’m hungry. </p>
<p>The last month has been a big one. Traveling to Newcastle from Gunnedah every weekend sleeping at friends houses, recording an album and doing extra photo shoot work. </p>
<p>This time of year is always a downer for me; winter chills me to my core. Having a history of mental illness, I use to call winter my down season. My time when depression would hit, and I would get stuck in a rut of self-pity. </p>
<p>2014 I was fresh home from my Bachelor adventure and a spark had caught a light to my creative spirit again. 2015 I was about to embark on an adventure of a lifetime to Nashville, Tennessee. Reflecting on my time since I’ve been 100% healthy, winter 2016 marks two years medication free without ghosts in my head whispering sweet nothings of helplessness. </p>
<p>Despite this incredible feet, my day’s are simple. Nothing extraordinary has dazzled my life or painted my dull grey winter skies into a vibrant sparkling masterpiece that fill my heart with awe. </p>
<p>As I continue through a never-ending “to do” list before I set out on another expedition. I have noticed a silence in my life. Almost like something feels missing. </p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/78398fb9841abe614808bb84f93153246dec5b44/original/screen-shot-2018-05-29-at-11-55-39-am.png/!!/b:W1sic2l6ZSIsIm1lZGl1bSJdXQ==.jpg" class="size_m justify_left border_" /> I cease to thrive when I get caught in the mundane day to day. I live for adventure; I crave change, and I passionately continue my quest to evolve. </p>
<p>But yet, here I am on a train. Somewhere between Sydney and Newcastle watching the tree tops blur into the sunset as the carriage flys by with haste and speed just as I wish to be doing. </p>
<p>But I am still. Observing this strange sense of peace that I seek to find within me, questioning my sense of gratitude and asking myself if I’m taking the opportunity to breathe in this moment? </p>
<p>I hate these moments! Stuck in time, the immobility of it all almost haunts me. Anxiety has a chance to rise within me, as impatience dances to the surface. The guilt of not making progress in my journey slowly eats at me and then when panic is just about to take over, outside turns black. </p>
<p>The train glides smoothly, with a sense of stillness, peacefully through a blackened tunnel. The blurred flash of movement disappeared into the darkness. </p>
<p>Right then, I felt a sense of peace. I remember my depression grasping onto me and reflecting back despite it weighing me down like chains unable to walk towards my goals. Now, I feel like it was all apart of the journey. It’s the ebb and flow of life. That darkness and stillness made me grow more than what any amount of mobility had done before that time. </p>
<p>As the yin and yang of my life had finally become clear. It felt like the calm before the storm. Like something magic is about to happen. The train gave a massive jolt as we swiftly depart the tunnel, and I realised how far we had come despite being able to see the physical progress. </p>
<p>Then I realised, I had made peace with peace and relaxed into my seat and enjoyed now cherished moment of “mundane.”</p>Katrina Burgoynetag:katrinaburgoyne.com,2005:Post/52633832018-05-29T11:55:03-05:002018-05-29T11:55:03-05:00Finding North<p>Let's make one thing clear. I'm no girls scout leader. If I found myself lost in the woods, I would probably struggle to survive. </p>
<p>My map reading skills, no longer developed since my brothers 11th birthday where my Mother set up a scavenger hunt for all his friends across our local mountain top. I'm now at the mercy of Google maps and <br>GPS navigation and the need to find North has become obsolete in my life. </p>
<p>I wanted to write this article today because I know what it feels like to be directionless, empty and lost. I wanted to bring awareness and a little encouragement into the lives of people who are still stumbling along a path without the knowledge of their inner compass or purpose. </p>
<p>2012-2014 I had come to a point in my life where I had accepted that my music wasn't going to go anywhere, so I started studying graphic design. Trying to find a way to get an education and find a "regular job" so I could continue living the temporary "normal life" I happened to be living at the time. I started to live for the weekend, drinking once a week with my girlfriends and catching up for lunches to talk about boys and gossip. </p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/ea79d44620e93fd455fbb00c5909a7108b3ff8a9/original/screen-shot-2018-05-29-at-11-54-11-am.png/!!/b:W10=.png" class="size_l justify_center border_" />I splashed in my shallows, dancing upon my surface, unknowingly unaware of the true purpose of my existence. I felt hollow and directionless. My inner compass spinning out of control. I was lost, living the same day on repeat. I would wake up and like the pin on a record player; I would play the same song. It made me happy, my body would groove to the beat, it was light, easy, I knew all the words off by heart. But just like every favourite song, it becomes dull, overdone and I desired to skip to a new sound. </p>
<p>In April 2014, I met a rare like-minded spirit which set my soul on fire and reminded what it was like to dream again. I didn't realise I was lost until I had found myself. I didn't realise I was hungry to express myself through music until I started to create again. I didn't realise that I was off my path until I come back to walk upon that long forgotten yellow painted cobblestone leading me to my Oz. </p>
<p>I believe that in our life we are given little hints, guiding us to be the person we have the potential to be. I believe that each and every one of us is given hidden talents. I believe it is a part of our awakening to find and become our full potential, empower ourselves, let our light shine bright and bless the world with a little more magic. </p>
<p>For me, I find it very easy to forget "my North," when a man comes into my life who's compass reads differently to mine. I'm such a passionate being, and my dreamy romanticism lingers like smoke in my eyes and only until I lose myself, and he realises I'm only desirable when I follow <br>"my North." As our hands become further from reach, and he continues his journey on a different road, leading to another place, I run behind with my dreams falling out of my duffel bag and laying like shrapnel, assuring him "I don't need them." I then kick myself, gather my things, humbled, and disappointed with no choice but to be off in my true direction once again. I'm slowly getting better at seeing and accepting this before I make that last desperate plea in the name of love. </p>
<p>I am so blessed to have found my true passion in music at such a young age. I know I was tip-toeing around something very special, music is my gravity. However over the last few years, I'm still discovering a deeper meaning to my life. I'm following the whispers of desire, learning to draw, photography and writing these blogs. The little whispers of "I'd love to write a song one day" when I was six, was guiding me to where I am today. Writing these blogs have been inspiring as I've watched my writing develop and now desire to one day write a book on spirituality and self-awareness. If I ever do that is another story, however, I have heard the whisper directing me, encouraging me to continue finding my voice. </p>
<p>I believe that no matter where we are, how bad things are or how lost we feel, always have comfort that we are always exactly where we are meant to be. I believe it's important to take the time to invest in our spirit and feed our soul what it is hungry for. Today is the day to listen, start that book or blog, start that project, begin that gym program. We are all being called and a year from now we would have wished we have started today. The only way is North. We can’t miss it when we listen to our heart.</p>Katrina Burgoynetag:katrinaburgoyne.com,2005:Post/52633822018-05-29T11:53:41-05:002018-05-29T11:53:41-05:0028 Years & A Few Lessons Later<p>This week I celebrated my 28th Birthday. I don't have the colour to splash or the gems to be-dazzle an ordinary day. </p>
<p>The air was fresh. The leaves were falling from the dry brittle trees. The sun beamed an autumn ray, as an icy wind whisked through the holes of my green knitted jumper. </p>
<p>My one and only was taking me for a brunch date, something we never take the time to do as we were both in reasonably high spirits. My one and only, of course, is my Mother Julie aka"J-Bags". (In a family board game night, "J-Bags" became Mum's new nickname and it stuck). </p>
<p>The rest of the day I spent alone, pottering about the house and catching up on some work. I told you no colour. </p>
<p>Reflecting on my last five challenging years in particular I wanted to share with you a few little lessons that I have learnt. At age 23, a folk presented in the road on my journey. I could chose a life of existence or a life of living. Living meant awakening. This is what I believe. </p>
<p>One of the greatest lessons I have learnt in my 27th year was that I am always exactly where I am meant to be. There was a sense of surrender. I wasn't fighting to make things happen. I just walked through doors whenever they presented. I trusted in myself and knew the universe would provide. </p>
<p>After years of fighting to be heard with my music and fighting to make relationships work. This rang true in Nashville last year. I surrendered, I was so at peace not expecting anything all I knew was I was exactly where I was meant to be and the opportunity presented. </p>
<p>I've learned that what we don't like in others is just a reflection of what we don't like in ourselves. I'm not talking about acquaintances that spend their life trying to get Instagram likes (that pisses me off) or those moody people that you don't know if they like you or hate you every other day (I can't be bothered wasting my energy with these people). </p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/e3fd8759f9a6d97f206517b23a5b680ecd024d4b/original/screen-shot-2018-05-29-at-11-52-57-am.png/!!/b:W1sic2l6ZSIsIm1lZGl1bSJdXQ==.jpg" class="size_m justify_center border_" /></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em>2 8 T O D A Y // May we continue to evolve and become our best selves! This last year I've learnt that "my best" is good enough, failure is a ticket to a new adventure and that taking risks shouldn't be feared but embraced! I've spread my wings, found my truest self and have continued to take positive steps towards my purpose here on earth! Thank you to the ones who have opened your hearts to me, electrified my mind, touched my soul and shared a little place in our existence — in Gunnedah, New South Wales. </em></p>
<p>I'm talking about those people who have connected with you deeply. They disappointed you, challenge you or hurt you in some way. Our resentment towards that person makes us notice so many things we dislike about them. Observe them, try to be kind. If you can remove yourself enough, you will see your own insecurity, flaws, and imperfections. You will also find that person to be a wonderful teacher, as they leave your life be sure to bless them for everything you have learnt. </p>
<p>The people on my list have taught me so much, despite the challenge, and heartache. I choose now to look at them with love rather than hate. Seeing my flaws in them was incredibly confronting and I continue to make myself a better person because of their lessons. </p>
<p>I've learnt that doing my best IS good enough. I no longer beat myself up over mistakes. It's just the universe saying "It's ok, it wasn't meant to work out that way." Knowing this, my best changes due to conditions. My best on a sick day is still my best. My best on a day when the big bad wolf is whispering darkness in my mind, eating my self-esteem is still my best. We may not always be 100%, but we should always be our best. </p>
<p>Failure doesn't even exist. It's a myth. You have the ability to do anything you desire. Failure is just a roadblock, telling you to change lanes. Something better is coming, trust yourself. The moment we let failure dictate our worth is when everything falls to pieces. </p>
<p>I struggle to hold myself together in these times. I typically lay in bed for two weeks, with high levels of anxiety unable to eat without being sick. I'm fierce. Determined not to show my weakness I cut people out of my life, pretend I'm not disappointed. But in truth, I'm sensitive, and my hurt is soul deep. Thankfully my ability to snap out of it is becoming easier for me. </p>
<p>Knowing that failure isn't real this has given me the faith to take risks. What is there to be afraid of? Two weeks in bed feeling sorry for myself? Small price to pay, for taking a big leap of faith. Most times you will find that if you leap the net will appear. </p>
<p>My last and most important lesson is something that I'm never too shy to write about, learning to love ourselves. We are all beautifully imperfect creatures. We make mistakes; we get lost, but if we continue to give self-love, we will always find our path. </p>
<p>Self-love is the greatest gift I have ever received. My world changed the moment I started to accept the person that I am. </p>
<p>Thank you for sharing this weeks thoughts with me. I feel so blessed to have such an opportunity to touch souls for just a moment.</p>Katrina Burgoynetag:katrinaburgoyne.com,2005:Post/52633812018-05-29T11:51:50-05:002018-05-29T11:51:50-05:00La, La, La Not Listening<p>Throughout the seasons of your life, I'm sure you have all had many times when you have come across people who feel they know you enough to share their suggestions on how you could be a better person by stating what's wrong with you. They are everywhere, trolling on Facebook, Instagram, every which way we turn there is always someone making judgment. </p>
<p>This is how I deal with it. </p>
<p>Coming from a small town of Gunnedah our community can lift each other up and support your every victory. However, it also is full of people with "tall poppy syndrome" who feel responsible for making sure they "keep you humble." </p>
<p>Last spring I arrived back home from the most incredible adventure of living in the states for three months. Pursuing my career as a songwriter, following my dreams and chasing my heart's desire. A journey that took four years to buy a ticket. It was my first time out for dinner in my local community. I was so full of pride after undertaking such a big trip on my own after years of contemplation. </p>
<p>A stranger approached me then proceeded to insult me about a not so flattering moment when I was on "The Bachelor Australia". He told me I was "hard" and come across as a "bit of a bitch." Stopped in my track, I was taken back a little. </p>
<p>Who does that? Who goes and tells a stranger that they think they come across as a "bit of a bitch"? What grounds does he have to assume that of me? A produced TV series? 15 seconds of cut and pasted maximum drama after edit? He has no perception of who I am to call judgment and his opinion was unjustified. </p>
<p>I won't lie; it did affect me as I analysed his words for a moment. But I feel it was more of a representation of him rather than myself. By the time I finished processing, I sadly believed that if he were full of self-love, he would have only projected kindness. Instead, I metaphorically put my fingers in my ears and sang "La la la not listening" before his bitter venom could poison my veins. </p>
<p>This isn't the first time I've been publicly insulted by a stranger, and I'm sure it won't be the last. I have got to the point when confronted by these people with "tall poppy syndrome" to stop justifying myself and cut them out of my life. </p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/e184d7ecdc840963e13e85c3340cdb0656842098/original/screen-shot-2018-05-29-at-11-51-15-am.png/!!/b:W1sic2l6ZSIsIm1lZGl1bSJdXQ==.jpg" class="size_m justify_left border_" />A hometown acquaintance suggested "I wasn't true to myself" in two of the biggest and most truest moments of my life. When I released my debut video clip and then again when I was in Nashville chasing my dreams. His voice of concern wasn't heard when I was dating a guy totally wrong for me. When I gave up on music, because I thought I wasn't good enough to pursue a career and also when I was on national TV a little lost but somehow finding my way. </p>
<p>If someone doesn't walk beside you and support you, love you for all your imperfections without making demands on your character to be better, than I don't believe they deserve a place in your life. </p>
<p>We hold so much responsibility on ourselves, trying to make everyone happy. But essentially we forget to ask the question, "Does this person make me happy? Does this person add value to my life?". </p>
<p>If the answers are no, free yourself from their negativity. You will never measure up. You will never be good enough, and you will only be left questioning yourself. </p>
<p>I believe we should all go to sleep at night and feel gratitude in knowing that we reflected the best version of ourselves that day. Self-love has no place for other people's opinions and judgment. After all, we are our own biggest critic. We are hard enough on ourselves without others confirming the flaws that we try so hard to love. </p>
<p>Put your fingers in your ears "La la la not listening" and guilt free, pride yourself on walking away, pressing the "block" button and cutting their poison out of your life forever. </p>
<p>My best friend Chad always says "Those that know you, love you. Those that don't, assume".</p>Katrina Burgoynetag:katrinaburgoyne.com,2005:Post/52633802018-05-29T11:50:38-05:002018-05-29T11:50:38-05:00Worthy<p>I have always been a high achiever because I feel the need to prove my worth to people. </p>
<p>There I said it. Let's be real, cut the crap and just be honest. </p>
<p>I was never a pretty girl; I was awkwardly skinny with frizzy hair and bottle top glasses. The boys ran a little faster if I was on their tail in a game of "catch and kiss". I was in the bottom classes at school and even sent to the "special reading class", (still today my reading speed is equivalent to an 11-year-old). I was called "dumb" because my brain wasn't programmed like the other kids and I always felt like an outsider. </p>
<p>As I write this, I know a million other girls will most likely have a similar perspective reflecting on themselves. </p>
<p>I was 9 when the teacher conducting our school choir chose me to sing a solo because I had the loudest voice. At the same time, I was teaching the other clarinet players in the school band how to read music. By highschool I sat in the school yard singing to people at lunch time, and I appeared in the local paper a few times a month. My ego was ready to show off "what I can do" and my spirit was screaming out, "VALIDATE ME". </p>
<p>In my adult life, I found a natural ability to pick up most creative outlets and make good. Although now from a humble place and possibly a habit of my desire to seek and learn. Music, drawing, photography and spirituality come to mind. But my continual strive to aim higher and be better is because I want to prove that I'm worthy to myself and to those I love, (told you I'll be honest). </p>
<p>How many times have you questioned if a guy is "out of your league"? Compared yourself to your friends? Questioned if your partner or friend will still want you around if they knew you completely? </p>
<p>How beautifully vulnerable is it to ask yourself these questions? But how utterly terrifying to share these insecurities with someone else. So we bury them down (hopefully) never to reveal our inner self, longing to be accepted. We pray and hope that, that someone will prove our fears are ghosts that will disappear in the night with their validation. </p>
<p>We are all human, with a longing to be appreciated. </p>
<p>This is what I've learnt. If you exist, you are worthy. The end, full stop! </p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/85ac6858309179ccb12755c5ecfffc0cd3679830/original/screen-shot-2018-05-29-at-11-50-11-am.png/!!/b:W1sic2l6ZSIsIm1lZGl1bSJdXQ==.jpg" class="size_m justify_left border_" />Growing up, my love for my father was put on trial and tested until I crumbled into pieces a crying mess needing comfort from him. It was only this week that I realised he did this because he didn't believe he was worthy without that validation. The behaviour of trialing and testing is something I have taken into my relationships, and learning this I wanted to address the fact of my doubt of being worthy. </p>
<p>We all play the leading lady in our story, most of us are too busy focusing on getting our part exquisitely perfect. If you have evolved enough to walk your life without making mental notes of the chorus's imperfections or show jealousy, you possibly look at other people with admiration holding them above yourself. Why don't we see ourselves in the same light? You are worth seeing yourself with the same admiration. </p>
<p>To conclude this week I wanted to note its totally ok to question yourself from time to time. But ultimately there is an unconditional loving force greater than all of us. We were born worthy, so let's start believing it. </p>
<p>Thank you so much for all the support this week with my Nashville campaign. This was another moment I questioned if I was worthy. However your support has been so incredible. I feel so blown away and grateful. Thank you. </p>
<p>To support the campaign please head to http://www.gofundme.com/katrinaburgoyne I have a brand new exclusive album coming soon. The only way to get your hands on a copy is through this campaign, I'm really excited about these songs. </p>
<p>Thank you for sharing another precious moment with me. </p>
<p>Kat x</p>Katrina Burgoynetag:katrinaburgoyne.com,2005:Post/52633792018-05-29T11:49:30-05:002018-05-29T11:49:30-05:00CMC Awards 2016<p>Given the electrifying buzz of coffee and excitement in the production room, you would never know it was a dreary, raining, abnormal Queensland day. </p>
<p>It was a Wednesday, and CMC had just arrived in the sunshine state to host the biggest fan-voted music awards in the southern hemisphere, the CMC Awards. </p>
<p>Over the next 36 hours, my Bachelor Australia co-star Mary O'Neill from Honey On The Railroad and I were to take over CMC's social media. Reporting on all the behind the scenes action as a direct connection to over 200,000 Country Music Channel fans, concluding our last hour hosting Facebook Live as we interviewed the stars from the Red Carpet. </p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/8bb6f645af0412a36964552d2a3788d09ee8f7d4/original/screen-shot-2018-05-29-at-11-48-51-am.png/!!/b:W1sic2l6ZSIsIm1lZGl1bSJdXQ==.jpg" class="size_m justify_left border_" />What an experience! Even through my damp windblown hair from the Brisbane sidewalk, I radiated a beaming smile, courageously ready to take on the challenge. </p>
<p>Mary and I had the incredible opportunity to interview Adam Harvey, Shane Nicholson, Beccy Cole, Kelsea Ballerini, Jason Aldean, Kip Moore, Amber Lawrence, Jasmine Rae and Drake White. </p>
<p>We spent the Wednesday and Thursday in our own private performance at sound check and dress rehearsals in awe of some of the world's biggest country music stars absorbing their inspiration. </p>
<p>One of my highlights was meeting Kelsea Ballerini and admiring her playful spirit shining brightly as she welcomed Australia with open arms. Her team was so friendly, enthusiastic and they were simply beautiful people. After our interview, we spent some time and talked for a while. You can't really describe a checklist for the "X-Factor", you just know it when you see it and Kelsea definitely has that kind of star quality. </p>
<p>I was nominated at the very first CMC music awards. Over the past six years, I feel incredibly proud to have watched the growth of these awards. Coming from a humble "industry only" function in the Hunter Valley this year's awards were hosted by QLD's QPAC, seating an intimate 1500 people. </p>
<p>The reason why the CMC Awards are so special is because it is decided by the fans for the fans. CMC has the ability to give Australian Country Music supporters a voice and has become one of the leading music awards our industry has to offer. </p>
<p>Being involved in the industry for over 10 years I got to catch up with many of my friends on the red carpet. I've seen new talent come through and continue to push the boundaries, I've watched star's like Amber Lawrence, Jasmine Rae, The Wolfe Brothers and Catherine Britt emerge from humble beginnings and blossom into the incredible, admired artists they are today. </p>
<p>Mary and I have never hosted before, so you could imagine the nerves that were running through our veins. What would we talk about for an hour? But all in all we surprised ourselves and are incredibly proud of our efforts having over 11,000 viewers join us on Facebook Live on the red carpet. </p>
<p>Mary's love for country music is a passion that is deep to her core, her enthusiasm and work ethic is one driven by pure love for our genre. Early this year Mary created an online platform to promote country music artists through interviews and country lifestyle check out Honey On The Railroad. Only new to the industry, I couldn't help feel excited as I watched her eyes fill with wonder as she continued to meet some of her favourite artists. I feel really special to have seen her inner child beaming so brightly with excitement and watch as her dream become a reality. </p>
<p>'Being a part of this years CMC Music Awards has filled me with so much gratitude and love for the Country Music community. It was a dream come true having the opportunity to represent CMC as a blogger and interview artists who I respect so much. Being brought together with so many amazing people, the fans, crew and artists, all for our mutual love of the same thing is truly a beautiful thing and I will cherish this memory forever' Mary O'Neill - Honey on the Railroad </p>
<p>Someone who impressed me was Caitlyn Shadbolt. Discovered on X-factor in 2014 she recently signed to ABC and took out the new Oz Artist Of The Year. I found her to be a dream to interview with such maturity beyond her years. Her music and film clips are fresh and captivating, and I'm very excited to see what the future holds for her. </p>
<p>The Wolfe Brothers are one of the hardest working bands I've seen in years. 2014-2015 saw them tour endlessly with Lee Kernaghan. Last summer they farewelled Australian BBQ's and double pluggers as they packed their bags to write and record a brand new album in the midst of a cold Nashville winter. I was so proud to cheer them on as they collected their win for CMC Group or Duo of the Year. Surrounded by such strong competition alongside The Adam Eckersley Band and Adam Brand and The Outlaws I'm sure the boys would have been stoked to be called Australia's favourite. </p>
<p>"The CMC awards are all about the most important people in the industry, the fans! They vote for the winners, they listen to the songs and they are the reason we get to do this. It is such an honour to win an award and be in the industry!" The Wolfe Brothers </p>
<p>For the second year in a row Amber Lawrence was crowned CMC Female Oz Artist of the Year bringing a proud tear to my eyes, she was dressed in stunning red. One of the things I admire so much about Amber is her ability to connect with her fans. I am such a believer in her and always love to rejoice in her achievements. Last Thursday night was no exception. </p>
<p>"It was a wonderful event mixing with the best of Australia's and USA's talent. Country music fans were loving it just as much as the artists" Amber </p>
<p>Winning awards for CMC Oz Male Artist of the Year, CMC Oz Video and the ARIA Highest Selling Australian Album, Australian icon Lee Kernaghan didn't have enough hands to hold them all. </p>
<p>Australia's favourite ratbag Adam Brand become CMC Oz Artist Of The Year. </p>
<p>"For me th CMC awards are the mos special of all, because they are decided not by critics, experts or industry insiders. They are decidd by the people that matter the most. The power to dish out these awards are in the hands of mums, dad, sons, daughters and grandparents. And it'struly humbeling to recieve one of these awards". Adam </p>
<p>As I wrap up this week's blog I would like to firstly send a huge shoutout to everyone at CMC. I feel so blessed to have been given such an experience and also to the fans, thank you for reaching out and letting me be your voice. </p>
<p>A side note, this week my GO FUND ME CAMPAIGN has skyrocketed to almost $3,000. I would love if you could please continue to share. I am creating a brand new mini album to raise funds for me to move to Nashville and continue my dream of becoming a songwriter. However it won't be commercially released, so the only way to get a copy is to secure one through this campaign. </p>
<p>A huge thank you to everyone for supporting me, you have the ability to give me the biggest opportunity and completely change my life forever. Please keep sharing and show your friends my music. I need all the help I can get. x </p>
<p>Head to Country Music Channel on facebook to view interviews and Mary and I live from the red carpet! xx</p>Katrina Burgoynetag:katrinaburgoyne.com,2005:Post/52633782018-05-29T11:47:42-05:002018-05-29T11:47:42-05:00New Music To Raise Funds For Nashville<p>I sit here in the dark under the flicker of a candle light. My MacBook illuminating the outlines of my shaky hands. I gulp down the stale air that has left my mouth dry and dehydrated. </p>
<p>I've spoken about ego, in my past blogs. I'm an Aries. I'm proud by nature, I'm very proud! Too proud to let a gentleman buy me a drink, as "I can pay for my own, thank you very much". My independence has been my greatest asset and also my biggest undoing. My pride will never ask for help, despite secretly wishing someone would just ask if I needed it. "Yes, I do need it" the whispers in my mind drifted into the abyss as my spoken word brings me to reality with a firm "I'm all right, I can do this on my own". I keep on pushing on, secretly kicking myself for never accepting the invitation and never learning my lesson. </p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/ea91d7f8801fe97c0c6aa0b4403f800a775f8707/original/screen-shot-2018-05-29-at-11-47-13-am.png/!!/b:W1sic2l6ZSIsIm1lZGl1bSJdXQ==.jpg" class="size_m justify_left border_" />The reality is, I do need help. My greatest anchor has always been financing; it's held me back from creating more albums, film clips and traveling to Nashville sooner. So much opportunity awaits me there, given the chance I would take it with both hands and work my butt off. I am driven and passionate. <br>I want to breathe in the cinnamon air and listen to the sound of honky tonks as they breeze past me in the wind. I want to feel the inspiration that floats out from the cracks in the concrete pavement on Music Row. My only problem is, I am not an American citizen and to move to the USA I need a VISA, minor hurdle. </p>
<p>I want to breathe in the cinnamon air and listen to the sound of honky tonks as they breeze past me in the wind. I want to feel the inspiration that floats out from the cracks in the concrete pavement on Music Row. My only problem is, I am not an American citizen and to move to the USA I need a VISA, minor hurdle. </p>
<p>To raise money, I'm bringing you brand new music. "Nashville" is a mini-album produced by Michael Muchow. It will be a jam-packed acoustic mix-tape with eight songs written in Nashville. The catch, "Nashville" will never be commercially released. To secure your copy, please head to www.gofundme.com/katrinaburgoyne you can check out all the fun packages available. It will only be available for a limited time so, please get in and secure yours TODAY. </p>
<p>Given the opportunity to live in the USA, my goal would be to focus my aim on securing Publishing within 12 months. I believe with all my heart, I am meant to be there. After this journey of self-discovery and building my inner strength I no longer doubt my ability and know that I can do this. </p>
<p>To make moving to Nashville a reality I need your help, please buy my album. Spread the word by sharing and telling all your friends. I've never needed your support as much as I do right now. </p>
<p>I will be given out 5 thank you gift packs full of CD's, Buttons, Stickers, T-Shirt and Poster to my top 5 online champions who share, post and encourage their friends to jump on board and support "Nashville". </p>
<p>Lastly, I can't express how grateful I am to everyone who has followed my journey, opened up your life and heart to me. I only have a small amount of supporters but your praise, and your voice has always echoed enough for me to hear it. I feel blessed to be able to connect and share this journey with you. </p>
<p>I FREAKING LOVE YOU xxx</p>Katrina Burgoynetag:katrinaburgoyne.com,2005:Post/52633772018-05-29T11:46:16-05:002018-05-29T11:46:16-05:00Vulnerable<p style="text-align: center;"><em>“To share your weakness is to make yourself vulnerable; to make yourself vulnerable is to show your strength.” <br>― Criss Jami</em></p>
<p>Raised in a creative family, we are all somewhat misfits. The odd ones in a crowd with bottle top glasses, wild thick curly hair, bushy eyebrows and this unknown rhythm in our body that we can't help but shake it when the beat drops. My Brother, Cousins, Aunties and Uncles, were never "footy players" or budding sports stars oozing with masculinity. In fact, our depth perception (or lack of) makes us rather impressive on a tennis court holding the record for the most balls not hit. We are creators, computer gamers, intellects and communicators. </p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/d6be51eb09efaad0de34a7fb03161b317047f8f2/original/screen-shot-2018-05-29-at-11-45-25-am.png/!!/b:W1sic2l6ZSIsIm1lZGl1bSJdXQ==.jpg" class="size_m justify_left border_" />A recent family reunion had all of my relatives perform a "talent" show on a home built stage in my Great Uncles backyard. It wasn't about quality, obviously, for all the dogs in the neighborhood were howling. It was about expression, connecting, supporting and having fun. We are odd, outgoing, outcasts that somehow fit into society by being brave enough to hold out our big hearts knowing how sensitive we are. How deeply we hurt when we are broken but trusting others to appreciate our gift of love. </p>
<p>When I started blogging, it was an experiment. My passion for songwriting has been my longest love affair, and I thought how magical it would be not to have the restrictions of "rhyme or metre". With a great passion for self-help, spirituality and motivational books, combined with my own experiences, I have often said: "I would love to write a book one day". I don't believe I qualify to "teach" or "help" others along their path like the books that I enjoy reading so much. My ambition behind blogging has never been to inspire or empower my readers, although that response has been a sweet surprise. My intention was simply to connect with my readers, share pieces of myself and sprinkle a little joy. </p>
<p>Over the last few weeks, I have had strangers pull me up on the street, personal messages and supporters at my shows who expressed how much they have enjoyed my blogs and the strength I have encouraged in their lives. I never posted a blog that I haven't genuinely felt or shed a tear, and I have never known the power of vulnerability until after sharing my story with you. Thank you for your loving kindness and being so gentle with my heart. </p>
<p>I believe our need to build walls to protect ourselves in this consumerist society has become second nature. Authenticity is void, our spirit in its rawest form is disclosed and hidden. </p>
<p>In 2014, I heartbreakingly had to make the choice to sever ties with my father. I never knew what it felt like to have my heart ripped right out of my chest. A new sense of emptiness appeared that I had to learn to fill with my own self-love. Sharp daggers punctured into where my heart use to be, twisting slightly to teach me the most painful lesson of deep rejection. But guess what? I made it through the pain, I stumbled through the shrapnel of our venomous words, our spiteful actions and the pieces left of our broken relationship. When I had reached the point of not needing to cry anymore and when the pain no longer hurt, I woke. I was alive. I was still breathing and I was ok. </p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/289719a69c1372e35ccfdf8502dae8fc4c886384/original/screen-shot-2018-05-29-at-11-45-30-am.png/!!/b:W1sic2l6ZSIsIm1lZGl1bSJdXQ==.jpg" class="size_m justify_right border_" /> Right then, I could have simply wrapped up my bleeding heart. To scared to show it to anyone else in fear of feeling rejection once again, but I didn't do that. I looked around at the mess my vulnerability had made, one by one I picked up each broken piece and started to glue back together my worth, my strength, my hope and belief in others to be kind. Like repaired shattered porcelain, I'm not perfect. I have cracks. I have missing parts. But I'm stronger, wiser and a better person because of it. </p>
<p>My love for my father has not been sacrificed. If anything, I love him the best way I have ever loved him. After all, he has been my greatest teacher. How blessed am I to know that I will never feel rejection like that again? I AM FREE! FREE TO BE VULNERABLE! I can do anything, and I feel safe in the universe knowing that I've already felt the worst. It makes's it a little easier when I put into perspective that I plan to take over the world by sharing my music and a ton of love. </p>
<p>"Those that know you love you. Those that don't, assume". My best friend Chad </p>
<p>I believe that we are on this earth to evolve spiritually, emotionally and physically. We either act out of love or out of fear and by sitting in the confines of our safest hideaway in fear, we don't challenge our spirit to grow. </p>
<p>Life is hard! But I believe it's so much more rewarding when you open your heart to the world and in all your fear you become fearless despite it all. I dare you, I dare you to be vulnerable! </p>
<p>I can't thank my readers enough for sharing your time with me; I've been so moved by your response and loving support. I have some exciting news to share with you this next week, so stay tuned. </p>
<p>CMC has also announced that I'll be a guest blogger for the CMC Music Awards; I'll spend time with the artists in rehearsals and posting to social networks with my Bachelor Australia co-star Mary O'Neill, who blogs for Honey On The Railroad. If you would love to ask any of your favourite artist questions, I will do my best to get the job done. Please tag #CMCAWARDS in your statuses. </p>
<p>Thank you once again. I am blessed. </p>
<p>Love Kat x</p>Katrina Burgoynetag:katrinaburgoyne.com,2005:Post/52633762018-05-29T11:44:21-05:002018-05-29T11:44:21-05:00Three Months Songwriting In Nashville, Part 3<p>My infinite passion for discovering creativity goes deeper than the bone. It's bigger than me! It's greater than all of us! I believe that spirituality and creativity go hand in hand. If you don't believe me, I encourage you </p>
<p>to listen to that wave of inspiration. Write that book, paint that picture, draw that portrait, arrange a beautiful bouquet of flowers, photograph your children. If you can master the ability not to analyze your work critically I guarantee you, you will feel something magical. Glimmering in front of you will be a reflection of your authenticity, vulnerably staring you boldly in the eyes and as your observe, you'll witness your spirit dancing across the canvas of your choice. </p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/3409a117cf34009262a1b85623df800afd630aa3/original/screen-shot-2018-05-29-at-11-43-00-am.png/!!/b:W1sic2l6ZSIsIm1lZGl1bSJdXQ==.jpg" class="size_m justify_left border_" />Despite believing that everyone should be encouraged to live creatively, I also hope that my future children don't feel the same calling that I do. Creativity as a profession is a whirlwind of wildest dreams coming true, excitement and one of the most thrilling rides I've ever jumped aboard. It's a spiraling into a shattering pain of heartache and rejection than as you get launched into the great unknown you find yourself back at the beginning willing to go through it all again. </p>
<p>I admire my mother for all her strength as she picked me up from broken pieces time after time with a sense of helplessness. She could have encouraged me to give up, and wrapped my fragile soul in bubble wrap protecting me from my next crash and burn. Instead, she encouraged me to learn how to fly. </p>
<p>I tried to give up; the pain was crippling. In 2012, I moved back to my hometown "Gunnedah". I taught singing lessons, played pub gigs on weekends. I found a lovely small town boy who I hoped to settle down with, spent my money on holidays our next goal was to buy our first house together. My creative outlets become photography, and I was studying graphic design. In 2 years I wrote five songs. Suppressing my need to write, sing and pursue this dream contributed to my depression. I lost my magic, and my spark was gone. I had nothing to contribute to the world, and I felt like I'd failed. </p>
<p>Under the layers of passion, ambition and my vulnerable at times self-doubt, deep down is hidden "a knowing". I remember as a little girl I knew I was going to do something extraordinary with my music. After fighting, pushing and feeding my ego for success "giving up" was when I truly began. Today I stand bare, humbled, and I believe beyond belief that I have the ability to pursue and succeed at whatever I desire to do. </p>
<p>As painful as this path is at times, it's more painful to stumble along lost untrue to myself, paralysed by fear and regret. So in learning that lesson, I found myself three years later in Nashville, Tennessee. Investing every penny I had into a dream that I have not choice but to chase. </p>
<p>It was October 12, 2015. Five days before I flew back to Australia. I walked into my publishing meeting Marty Morgan had arranged for me. I admired this publishing house as it saw 12 charting singles already for the year to date. I sat down on the leather studded couch and pulled out my broken guitar that I fell on the day before. I sang "When I'm Broken". When I finished the last chord I patiently waited for a response, I could hear myself gulp down my heart hoping that he would be kind. </p>
<p>His response "You know I have had over 100 people play me songs on that couch this year, and you're the first one that has blown me away". </p>
<p>Tears welled in my eyes. It's hard to describe why I felt so humbled while someone flattered my ego. But after 11 weeks on the other side of the world and years of little self-worth, my watery eyes twinkled as I masked welled emotions with a proud smile before an "ugly cry" had a chance to emerge. </p>
<p>After explaining that "When I'm Broken" is a duet he says "My friend is recording a duo album with his wife, would you mind if I pass this song along for him to have a listen?". </p>
<p>I politely agreed and curiously asked "Who was your friend?" </p>
<p>"Mr Grath Brookes" he responded. </p>
<p>In all honesty, Brookes may never hear my song. But if there was ever confirmation that I was exactly where I needed to be that was it. I believe my Nanna Peggy was looking down from above the entire trip, positioning me in the right place like a puzzle piece fitting perfectly together. I proceeded to play more songs, "That's a 2 million dollar song right there," he said with a matter of fact tone. Song after song his enthusiasm never deterred, we realised that we shared mutual friends in Australia and by the end of the meeting I had made a brand new friend in Nashville. </p>
<p>The Wednesday evening I played my first show at the Bluebird Cafe. One of the world's most prestigious songwriting venues. People line up and wait for hours in hopes to get a seat and musicians go through months of auditions to get a spot on the stage. Call it fate and a blessing that I happened to be invited to join a round. Marty Morgan's belief in me had him enthusiastically forging new opportunities for our songs to be sang and he was going to make damn sure I was the one singing them, knowing his kind soul, I can see why my Nanna chose him to guide me. After years of playing pubs fighting to be heard, you could listen to a pin drop throughout every song that evening. </p>
<p>One of the most rewarding parts of the night was when a women came up and hugged me at the end of the show. Through my songs, I connected with her and sang her story. I have never had an awful amount of opportunity where I could discover the power of my songs but that night I felt it. That was one of those magical moments I spoke about. </p>
<p>The Friday I experienced my first professional full band demo session recording "When I'm Broken" and by Saturday 7:30 am, my Nashville family had arrived to pick me up and drop me at the airport. </p>
<p>My trip was over; I was homeless, more broke than I've ever been in my life and bound for Australian shores. I learnt never to question fate, listened to where I am being guided and that within us we have a limitless amount of strength. I believe this because, in spite of my fear I became fearless. </p>
<p>Although I am now living at my mothers, my Nashville adventure isn't over. With the ambition of calling Nashville my home, I believe that this journey is just the beginning of a treasure trove of stories I'll collect as I continue chasing this untameable wild desire to dream and begin this thrilling ride all over again.</p>Katrina Burgoynetag:katrinaburgoyne.com,2005:Post/52633752018-05-29T11:41:55-05:002018-05-29T11:41:55-05:00Three Months Songwriting In Nashville, Part 2<p>Sifting back through my memories and glorious adventures, I can recall many "almost" victories. </p>
<p>I was 15 years old and credited in the top 4 vying for the Nashville Song Search. A 1 in 4 chance of an all expense trip to Nashville, I didn't win. </p>
<p>Toyota Star Maker in 2006, I was fresh out of school and believed that once I won Star Maker I was going to be launched as the "next big thing" into the Country Music Industry. In my mind, I had already won it. I remember crumbling to the bathroom tiles hid away from sorry and sympathetic eyes sobbing until I fell asleep on the cold, ceramic floor and my partner come to scoop me up and tuck me into bed. </p>
<p>I've had Management, Record Labels and Publishers dance around me singing my praise "Katrina's let's put a Question mark over a deal between us and see what comes". Much like my dating life their enthusiasm disappeared and we became distant strangers. </p>
<p>After ten years, I can honestly say it's all happened the way it was meant to. I needed to be humbled, I needed to be broken, I needed to stop fiercely fighting to be heard, and just listen. I needed to learn the lesson of trusting that I am always in the right place at the right time. An absolute example of this to be true is Nashville. </p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/3753ce523518cd015c5250eb4015d71d4862070e/original/screen-shot-2018-05-29-at-11-41-25-am.png/!!/b:W1sic2l6ZSIsIm1lZGl1bSJdXQ==.jpg" class="size_m justify_left border_" />By week six an Australian buddy introduced me to a welcoming flaming red haired women in midtown who hosted the Wednesday night Freakshow. Songwriters would get up and play three originals. My first performance I was last on the show, and there was only a handful of people left in the room but after that night, I made four new songwriting connections. I continued to go down midtown to watch the show. I found the people that went there so warm and friendly. They all possessed a quirky "out of place" quality like most misunderstood creative beings do, to me I felt like I was finally home. I met so many beautiful people at the Freakshow, Miranda Lambert would drop in now and then playing a little private show to no more than 50 of us beside Waylon Payne, who played Jerry Lee Lewis in Walk The Line. </p>
<p>I was songwriting my butt off. Always searching for new ideas, catch, phrases or anything that would strike a chord with me. I remember driving my housemates car home, and I got a "message". "I need to write a duet." I sat down in so many co-writing sessions trying to push the song in the direction of a duet, nothing worked, and it all turned out a mess. Duets are hard to cut in Nashville; I have no idea why but I know I needed to write one. </p>
<p>I made my way to a Publishing House to meet with a stranger recommended to by a friend. A middle age Jack Gyllenhaal look-alike waited to greet me in the dimly lit office. Goran is a dentist with an unexplainable ability to make a melody dance as he plays chords he doesn't the name of. He brought along his friend, who wore a clean white visor hat with wisps of salt and pepper hair springing out the sides like wings. I come to learn that Joe has had success as a writer in Nashville for two decades. With a Kenny Rogers cut like a cherry on top. </p>
<p>We started working on a song, throwing ideas around the room; it felt like any ordinary writing session. We were working on a song titled "Too Young For Dying". Inspired by a childhood friend who was tragically killed in a car accident only hours after a phone call to his Mother telling her he'd been posted to Iraq. They spoke about the danger and Travis's cheeky and reassuring spirit said: "I'm too young to die". Travis was only 19. </p>
<p>I don't even know why this line come out, but as we were working, I said: "I Only Drink When I'm Broken" (A line that I had in my ideas stash reflecting back on my time drinking red wine in the dark to numb my state of depression). Time stopped. We knew we needed to write that song. </p>
<p>As we put "Too Young For Dying" aside, Joe was snowballing ideas, "let's make a one-sided conversation, you know when a guy comes up to you at a bar?". We were on spit rapid fire, the three of us wrote the first verse in maybe 10 minutes. </p>
<p>"No this seats not taken. <br>It's Vodka straight on ice. <br>Sure I'll have another, I'll be here a while. <br>Yeah, I'm from around here, but I grew up in Atlanta. <br>If you really want to know what brought me here tonight, I'll tell ya". </p>
<p>By the time, we completed a killer Chorus I was already thinking "This is a hit". Goran hesitated and fidgeted about in his seat "I don't normally do this, but should we" he paused looking worried, scratching his head, in fear of humiliation and searching for the words "should we write this as a duet?" It was like watching the magic happen; I knew this was the song I was asked to write. </p>
<p>That evening I got home and played the work tape on repeat. I sent it to one of my closest musical girlfriends Molly McClymont, and she called me right away... "Kat, this is a hit". </p>
<p>"When I'm Broken" become a song I performed everywhere. I remember after the first chorus at the Freakshow one night a songwriter that I admired but was too afraid to ask if he would work with me gasped and said "wow" as I was playing. He then suggested the soonest time we could arrange a co-write. </p>
<p>My network had grown, so much to the point that I could walk into Losers Bar in Midtown all by myself and know everyone there. I wasn't needy or seeking ways to "advance my career", to be honest strangely I never talked about music or my ambitions with any of my friends (except for my Nashville bestie Emily, who is equally ambitious working her way up in Publishing). Most of the time I was just hanging out, had fun drinking my water and made genuine to the bone friendships. I started meeting industry folk from other circles and soon felt like I had real friends. I had become a part of the Nashville community. </p>
<p>I remember one evening an Agent was holding a showcase. My girlfriends Emily and Taylor messaged me they were going. I had already received an invite. By the time I arrived the girls were sitting on bar stools so intimidated to walk up to the VIP area because they didn't know anyone. I scanned the room and instantly saw half a dozen people I knew well and led the way. That evening was one of my best nights in Nashville. </p>
<p>It was three weeks before I had to leave the States. I remember I was laying on my bed trying to settle my analytical mind from going through lyric ideas so I could enjoy a day off from writing and re-energize. My phone lit up like a Christmas tree; Marty Morgans bright southern voice sparkled with enthusiasm. "Kat, you'll never guess, is your diary available?". "I hope you don't mind, but I've organised some publishing meetings for you, when are you free?" </p>
<p>Looking at my full schedule, I wasn't free. I was booked to the brim, making every last second count before I left Nashville, but I somehow managed to fit in the handful of meetings he kindly organized. </p>
<p>Then he says "Oh yeah, 14th of October could you please make sometime around 6:30 pm, we have our own headline show at the Bluebird Cafe". </p>
<p>"The Bluebird Cafe?" I said in my faint voice of disbelief and just like that; I was booked to play one of the most prestigious songwriting venues in the world. </p>
<p>To be continued...</p>Katrina Burgoynetag:katrinaburgoyne.com,2005:Post/52633742018-05-29T11:39:30-05:002018-05-29T11:39:30-05:00Three Months Songwriting In Nashville, Part 1<p>The icy July wind blew through the open air platform as I waited for the next Sydney-bound train. Two suitcases with the zippers almost busting, a backpack, a songwriting book, a guitar, and my arm wrapped around one of my best mates knowing that the quick squeeze goodbye was going to be my bid farewell of a last familiar comfort. I was off to the USA. 90 days to find out if I belonged in a city that I felt my spirit was calling me too. </p>
<p>14 hours of confining myself to the luxury of cattle class as I crossed the Pacific Ocean. 6 hours stuck in of a dull, conventional boarding gate at LAX while the sunny California sky tormented me with the promise of a more exciting world outside. Then after further 6 hours with a numb bottom, in air wifi and a free packet of salted nuts, I landed in Nashville, Tennessee. </p>
<p>All I had was half an A5 page with scribbles of names of everyone that I knew listed. I had two weeks worth of co-writing appointments booked through friends, two publisher's contacts and for the first two weeks, I would be sleeping on a two seater couch and walking 6 miles to a co-write. </p>
<p>The romanticism of it all was so lustful, not the fact that it was so hot the glue melted my shoes regularly, or my daily budget wouldn't allow me to catch a cab. But I was in the songwriting capital of the world, and I was living my dream. </p>
<p>The first weekend I was in town I attended the NSAI summer camp. It was my first attempt at meeting locals and making friends. One of our tutors; hit writer Lance Carpenter (Love Me Like You Mean It- Kelsea Ballerini) took me under his wing and kindly had a few other ambitious writers and I back to his house for a BBQ every evening. Invited to his very first No.1 party, I attended with a big proud smile and a few tears. Sometimes Lance and I would catch up over Mexican and cheese dip and sit in his car and listen to his latest demos. I quickly learnt that Lance has one of the most beautiful, humble souls I have ever met, and his welcoming spirit made it a little easier to be so far from home. </p>
<p>I remember sitting in class beside a sweet, 14 year old girl frantically writing her opinioned constructive notes on someone else's song lyrics. Taken back by her bold, confidence my first thought was "Who does this little kid think she is?". As she stood up to voice her opinion of "what could be better about our classmates song" she said everything I was thinking. Instantly I became a believer in Sara Davis; she was a prolific writer with the drive that reminded me of my younger self. </p>
<p>The first few weeks were pretty lonely. I hadn't made many friends. I would write two times a day Monday-Friday. But on Saturdays, The Davis Family would invite me down to Franklin. I would spend time with Sara, writing a song or simply connect with her passion for music. I got to know and fall in love with her incredible family, so much that I now call them my Nashville family. </p>
<p>It's one thing to show up in town with a suitcase full of aspirations and ambition, but it's another to be heard. Not many writers like to work with un-known writers, it was hard to get in the door. My books were full, but from the few writers that wanted to work with me again after our blind date co-writes. I was pleased that these writers were singing my praise to their publisher, and we were writing great tunes. </p>
<p>August 18, My blind date co-write Marty Morgan was a tall silver fox; he cussed as he painfully adjusted the coffee table to rest closer to him. He looked into the abyss without recognition or response as I threw some title suggestions at him. I kept talking to fill his silent stares, trying to lighten up the lines of deep thought on his face. </p>
<p>"Waiting For Shakespeare, you come up with that title?" he questioned. </p>
<p>I rambled on about the idea. His invalidating look deepened. I thought he hated me. Then suddenly painted across his face, bright as the summer sun a smile illuminated his every expression. "I FREAKING LOVE IT". </p>
<p>We sat in the room for 6 hours; I'd never met someone so open and vulnerable. We shared so much with each other, it's something most writers do in a session, but this was different. I was connecting, I was making a true friend. </p>
<p>Marty became my regular co-writer and buddy. He called me his "Wonder from down-under." Marty began to invite me to play writers rounds with him, work with him on jingles, record vocal sessions for him. He would take me fishing, bike riding, and we would share stories about our lives. </p>
<p>I come to learn of his pedigree and his family's contribution to the history of Country Music. His father George Morgan was an Opry Hall Of Fame member, best known for his song "Candy Kisses". His sister Lorrie Morgan, has charted over 25 times on the Billboard Country Singles Chart and had three no.1 hits. One evening Marty kindly invited me backstage at the Grand Ole Opry. The animation on his face as he shared stories about being a child and running around in the dressing rooms was so delightfully beautiful. We even found an old set list signed by his late father on display that he didn't even know existed, it was a special, unforgettable moment. </p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/52d1e0a6c8c646d6a51ad39bb58bbb8a9928dc62/original/screen-shot-2018-05-29-at-11-38-56-am.png/!!/b:W1sic2l6ZSIsIm1lZGl1bSJdXQ==.jpg" class="size_m justify_left border_" />It's hard to pat yourself on the back and just be proud and happy for the little victories you achieve. By week 6 I was a mess, I honestly believed that being in a city full of like minded people I was going to find so many friends and maybe love. Instead, I found a lot of loneliness. </p>
<p>I matched on Tinder with a gentleman who was friends with some of my Australian musician friends. I was invited on a bus trip to Santa Clause, Indiana to ride rollercoasters with a bunch of songwriters at Holiday World & Splashing Safari. I jumped on a tour bus with 16 strangers I had never met, hoping that I would be delivered home alive. I had a blast, and to know some faces around town made going out alone less confronting. </p>
<p>There is nothing more intimidating then surrounding yourself with established professionals and being asked what you do. The reply "I'm a songwriter, hoping to move to Nashville one day" is an all too familiar story written by a lot of ambitious songwriters who don't make the cut. Unfortunately without a reference, guitar or any notability in the US, I felt like I was put in that category many times. </p>
<p>I focused on having fun and making genuine connections. I thought if I can make a friend who likes me because of who I am, I won't feel "unworthy" of being in this town with my seemingly unrealistic dreams and a talent that may not be "good enough". </p>
<p>I won't lie, I called my Mum a lot questioning my ability. Shed tears, asked what am I doing here. But the truth was, I knew I wasn't good enough; I knew I needed to step up or go home. </p>
<p>To be continued...</p>Katrina Burgoynetag:katrinaburgoyne.com,2005:Post/52633732018-05-29T11:38:01-05:002018-05-29T11:38:01-05:00You Lead, I'll Follow<p>After my time on The Bachelor, I found it difficult to adjust to the real world. My life had changed forever; I had become so in tune with spirituality and myself. I knew what my every heart beat was whispering; I could feel my feet walking a new path as I inquisitively followed. I understood every feeling in my body, and what it was telling me, I had become self-aware. Around large groups of people, I felt engagement was fake and impersonal, I become a loner. </p>
<p>After an evening having social drinks with friends on Darby St in Newcastle, I had a few girls come and ask "Were you on The Bachelor?". This lead to a line of people queuing up to take a photo with me, even people who didn't watch the show. I was used to this from music events, but this was different. I hadn't validated myself as worthy of being in someone's photo, all I did was seek attention on national TV. I felt like I couldn't give them anything, a song, inspiration or even a simple, genuine connection. It was a hollow victory for 15 seconds of fame. I eventually use to shrug it off and say, "No I was on Bondi Rescue". I giggleed and they would walk away confused. A few weeks after I got kicked off people would just look at me as a familiar face they have met somewhere before, I much preferred the strange stares. </p>
<p>Dating for me has always been something I don't understand. I never actually dated in my adult life. From single at 17 with cute little dates to being 26 and guys simply after a "booty call". WHAT THE HECK IS A "BOOTY CALL"? I knew what I needed. I needed to be alone. Like actually alone! No dating, no messaging boys, no snap chats just me alone with my demons, sifting through the silence in my life and songs in my head. <img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/b4b11975da17bb2af0eea869f0978b9d2873f237/original/screen-shot-2018-05-29-at-11-37-19-am.png/!!/b:W10=.png" class="size_l justify_center border_" /></p>
<p>Another significant turning point for me was a book called "The Artist's Way". I believe that spirituality and creativity go hand in hand, I discovered this first hand in my time on the Bachelor, after writing journal entries I continued to write after the experience. I was guided by something bigger than myself, and my past experiences leave me with no scepticism that there is something bigger out there. My debut single was called "Ghost". About the darker side of spirituality, I discovered when I was 19 with enough evidence to make your skin crawl. But I'm not here to talk about my beliefs and how wakey I sound. </p>
<p>"The Artists Way" was educating me to live a creative life every day, even when I wasn't song-writing. I was contributing to creativity through drawing, photography and writing. I believe it allows me to connect to a higher vibration so when that killer song and inspiration wants to come through I'll be there ready to hear it loud and clear. </p>
<p>As I finished my last hurdle of overcoming a lifetime of unloving thoughts towards myself and disbelief in my abilities, I trusted that a path was going to open for me. I waited and waited. Shed layers, upon layers and continued to be patiently still until a way forward cleared. </p>
<p>October 2011, I threw out to the universe that I wanted to spend three months in Nashville writing songs. But I was to scared, I didn't know how to save for a trip that big. It had been so long since I had been to Nashville I knew no one. What if I failed? What if I come home broke with nothing to show for it? It became a dream packed in its suitcase labeled with the terrifying fears that haunted me about the possibility of failing my expectations. </p>
<p>August 2014 I received an email from a co-writer in Nashville, from a trip I had made back in 2009. </p>
<p>Hi, Katrina <br>You probably don't remember me; my name's Doc Holladay. We wrote a song together back in 2009. I just wanted to reach out and let you know that after all these years our song has just been cut. <br>Kindest regards, <br>Doc </p>
<p>Frantically picking up the phone, I called my Mum. It felt like something to perfectly divine to be dumb luck. Still to this day I believe my incredible Nanna Peggy was up above shoving my one and only demoed song lost in Nashville achieves of old hard drives, collecting dust in publishers faces, only to be contacted with the great news years down the track when I'm asking for guidance. I got a message and I called my mum right away. </p>
<p>"Mum I have a feeling I'm going to move to Nashville in two years, I don't know how or why but I just get a feeling". </p>
<p>And then I did nothing, I waited for my next cue. I wrote, I gigged, I continued to sit in silence focusing on my mental health and finding my strength. </p>
<p>I can't tell you the moment or paint a beautifully vivid picture. But in February 2015, I walked past Travel World on my way to yoga and my intention wasn't to even look in the window. But I felt such a strong urge I couldn't ignore it. It was like a magnetic force that dragged me into the store and asked the travel agent ticket prices to LA. "$1100 if you fly in July" her voice sparkled like magic. </p>
<p>That was all the money I had; that day I took the biggest leap of faith and booked my ticket.</p>Katrina Burgoynetag:katrinaburgoyne.com,2005:Post/52633722018-05-29T11:36:08-05:002019-06-29T13:25:50-05:00That Time I Was On "The Bachelor Australia"- Part 2<p>Dressed in shiny silver beads, I blessed my brand new Victoria Secret extra push up bra that kept my weighted strapless gown from toppling to the ground and leaving me in nothing but my underwear. The pain I went through in hopes of looking beautiful and admired come at the cost of layers of skin ripped from my bust area from Hollywood tape and the sharp cutting beads from the gown, shredding my skin. </p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/493d7e59958d8bc1865e71e36874ebf4dc9b5976/original/screen-shot-2018-05-29-at-11-35-04-am.png/!!/b:W1sic2l6ZSIsIm1lZGl1bSJdXQ==.jpg" class="size_m justify_left border_" />A week before meeting "The Bachelor" the producers called to asked if I would sing an original song on the red carpet upon meeting Australia's next Romeo. If I'm honest with myself, I was pretty stupid and naive to the situation. I honestly thought I could potentially meet the man of my dreams and fall in love. I told them that I was there to find love, not to promote my music. If I happen to write a song, I'll sing it, but I'm not going to put in much effort. I believe that inspiration will come if it's meant to. </p>
<p>24 hours before meeting Blake inspiration did sweep into my window with whispers of a song I ended up calling "Worth it". I had no one to play it to who could genuinely tell me if it was any good, but I promised that if I wrote a song, I would sing it. </p>
<p>Strapped in tight my stilettos hit the pavement with my guitar hanging from my neck. My only glimpse of the bachelor had been from the tinted window of the limo. My contact lenses were irritating so I ended up not wearing them at all. </p>
<p>My first impression of Blake Garvey was, "Wow, I like his long blonde hair slicked back into a ponytail". As I made my way closer to Australia's Bachelor, I realised that the blonde hair I swore I'd seen was beaming light reflecting from his bare shaven head. I giggled at my weak eyes and sank a little as physically I didn't find him to be attractive. </p>
<p>None the less he was lovely and welcoming. I sang him my sweet little song and continued the enchanted walk towards the illuminated mansion, where I chinked campaign filled crystal glasses of cheer and enjoyed the evening with my new girlfriends. That was the last time I spoke to Blake that night! </p>
<p>Our first cocktail party lasted two nights, finally at the end of the second evening, I had a moment to talk with Blake. By that point I had heard a lot about him, trying to figure out how in the world I was going to attempt to connect with a bland real estate agent that reminded me of many other gentlemen who I never gave a chance because their interests sounded uninspiring. But lost in my romanticism, I wanted to give him my time and see for myself. </p>
<p>The first rose of the season 2014 </p>
<p>After a few cute serves of banter, he kindly asked me if I wouldn't mind waiting while he went to "get something". Blake glided down the stairs in his impressive, smooth stride holding a beautiful long stem rose. "Katrina, do you accept this rose?". </p>
<p>Gushing and lost for words "Of corse I do Blake". </p>
<p>(Vomit, lame, moving on). </p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/524d17fc9248cde2254924610a7ed03ba52ea5f2/original/screen-shot-2018-05-29-at-11-34-58-am.png/!!/b:W1sic2l6ZSIsIm1lZGl1bSJdXQ==.jpg" class="size_m justify_right border_" /> After that first encounter with the bachelor, I ended up going through 4 rose ceremonies without ever spending more than that initial 10 minutes with him. Invited on one group date, I got to compete for the affections of a man by sharing my horseman skills (or lack thereof) and mechanical bull riding abilities. They had a country band playing that night and Blake kindly asked me to play him another song, so again I did. </p>
<p>Held captive in the house for five weeks, I spent my days keeping to myself writing in my journal or writing songs. </p>
<p>I passed time meditating with Laurina, she would nurture me with fresh green smoothies and make me do ab workout session much to my distaste. </p>
<p>Sam and I took turns in cooking each other dinner. We are both lazy cooks and realised we would sometimes go days without a proper meal, so we became a team and tried our best at keeping each other fed. </p>
<p>I would join Lisa for yoga sessions; we sometimes would make up silly little dances like 12-year-old girls. Although I didn't get super close to Lisa, she has a vibrant inner child that would call on my own to "come and play". I adore that about her. </p>
<p>Sam, Lisa and I also wrote an awesome song for Shana's birthday, we were so disappointed that our performance never aired. </p>
<p>One of my favourite things that I still miss to this day was my morning de-brief tea date with Chantal. We would analyse and get deep talking about our journey. I was overcoming depression at the time and had spent the last 12 months diving into my own quest finding my soul purpose and evolving spiritually. I was so proud of all the progress I had made. I wasn't as reactive to the world and it's challenges. </p>
<p>However, old habits die hard and my reaction shot me straight into the firing line for an express ticket home. </p>
<p>Within the first week, I was in the courtyard writing in my journal when I introduced myself to Zoe and felt cut down by a remark "I'm not here to make friends". I like to think I'm a good judge of character. After a further 18 months of growing, I've learnt a lot about Zoe's personality that makes me go, "Ahh, I understand her now. I get it". But at the time, I didn't. The weeks before I exploded I tried to connect and understand her. But it was like she didn't "get me" either. Every time I would say a joke she would openly say "Whoa, I don't appreciate that". Mind you, my terrible sense of humour always leads to tasteless jokes. However, she would roll in fits of laughter at other girls terrible disgusting (MAGNIFICENT) sense of humours. It was like she had an individual standard for everyone, and I didn't make the cut. If I'm honest, I felt her dismissiveness was rude, belittling and like I was not good enough to be her friend. CUE VIOLINS. </p>
<p>The evening I lost it </p>
<p>It was a Monday, a full moon. My period pain was almost paralysing, but it was cocktail night and we had a makeup call at 11 am. My hair was bad, my outfit was bad and my mood was bad. By that point 4 weeks in a mansion I was fine, I was proud of my behaviour. But this day, my fuse was short. If I'm honest with myself, Zoe could have done a tap dance to singing in the rain and I would have still been unimpressed. There was a moment that day when in mid-sentence talking to Zoe she turned her back on me and walked away, that's all it took. I had reached boiling point. </p>
<p>During the cocktail party, I lost it. I told her she was naturally rude. In a smooth firm delivery knowing mentally, it would have cut her up more than me kicking and screaming and throwing a tantrum while calling her nasty names. In my favour, I wasn't a critical player on the show so by the time the camera crew ran to the disagreement, Zoe had walked away deeply hurt by my carelessness. </p>
<p>The production tried to get as much as they could about the argument but neither of us gave them much to work with. I was questioning if I should leave that evening. I wasn't into Blake; I hadn't talked to time since night one. I was angry, I was embarrassed and felt like I had just singled myself out as being a nasty bitch amongst the girls only because one girl didn't validate me. That evening when Blake called my name, in my vendetta of tasteless honesty I said: "Do you think you could show a little more interest next week?". I was trying to sound playful but in my frame of mind, it come off like a car crash. Of corse I had given the producers what they were looking for and it was edited so perfectly dramatic and awkward. Memes were posted incorrectly "Do you think you could give me more attention next week". </p>
<p>In the grand scheme of things it was all pretty amusing, I stopped reading what social media was writing and didn't take it too personally. I was just coming off anti-depressants and despite my challenging frame of mind, I believed I did a good job on the show and knew I was a good person. Heck if that's me at my worst, I am winning at life. </p>
<p>The next week I made an effort to track down Blake and add another five minutes of time together. It was like I was talking to a cardboard cutout, he was disengaging but the poor bloke obviously wasn't interested. I wrote him a letter in hopes of saving my arse cause I knew I was next on the chopping block; I threw in a picture that I started drawing in lockdown. I was laughing cause it looked like it could have been a portrait of Blake when he was old (not weird at all). But I was proud of the drawing and wanted to share it. I somehow made it through another rose ceremony by the skin of my teeth. </p>
<p>Zoe and I become pretty vocal about our distaste for one another and tension in the house was horrible. I hate conflict and even after talks with Zoe trying to reconcile the problem we both still found our self at a loss in attempting to connect with and understand one another. One night Zoe and I broke out in an argument in front of the producers and after both not talking on camera they wanted a story to air. </p>
<p>Destiny was delivered in a small envelope enclosed with a limerick about how two would become one as The Bachelor dished out a double date at the Chinese Gardens, Sydney Darling Harbour between Zoe and I. </p>
<p>"There is only room for one curly haired blonde in the house" we all use to laugh about it and sometimes Zoe and I openly joke about our inability to understand one another in a strange lovingly way, reflecting back. When our names were called, there were straight jabs from Zoe saying "We wouldn't be here if you didn't start this". But somehow that night we became a team and supported each other. </p>
<p>I was the third wheel. But looking back now Zoe and I both say Blake was the third wheel. Yes, it was awkward. Blake and I couldn't connect at all in the slightest, and he was very much on Zoe's page. Despite date crashing, I couldn't believe how much fun I was having with Zoe, giggling at our attempts at eating chickens feet and ducks tongue. We were breaking down the walls of our indifferences and for the first time were real with one another. I think being in that situation we finally found a common ground. We were both feeling exactly the same, even though we come from completely different worlds. We bonded, and I found her to be beautiful. It was a bittersweet moment for the both of us. I do believe we challenged each other and taught one another a lot. </p>
<p>After my last one on one time with Blake, I felt like I was ready to go home. I knew I had achieved everything I needed to from the experience and was finally at peace. </p>
<p>I was dumped on national television at 3 am on a rainy autumn morning. Escorted to the Star Casino, I received my phone and connected to the outside world for the first time in 5.5 weeks. My mother and I had one of the longest chat of our lifetimes, speaking till the sun came up. </p>
<p>A lot of my friends have gone on to become socialites; I love watching them blossom proudly. I believe my time in the house was very much a personal one for me. I didn't travel across the world, sail on a super yacht or eat a "dirty street pie". It hasn't gained me Instagram followers, album sales or any significant opportunities. To the Bachelor viewers, I drifted off into the abyss. I soon become a ghost of a memory and that is totally okay. I grew so much from the experience and that's worth so much more. I am blessed.</p>Katrina Burgoynetag:katrinaburgoyne.com,2005:Post/52633692018-05-29T11:34:01-05:002018-05-29T11:34:01-05:00That Time I Was On "The Bachelor Australia"- Part 1<p>At 16 years old at the Tamworth Country Music Festival, I found myself at the Psychic Expo my palms read; I will be on National Television on a show I will never expect. When I was 22 and engaged to be married; I became engrossed in the American series of "The Bachelor". I said to myself "If I were still single that's something I would have done." </p>
<p>To be frank, I have always been unlucky in love. So far to date, my dating experience involves two failed long term relationships, many uninspiring coffee dates, swiping right on Tinder, players who weren't genuinely interested, really incredible nice guys that come on so strong I freaked out and even one gentleman that decided after dating me he didn't like girls. </p>
<p>It was January 2014; I had just gotten home from being pawed on the dancefloor by hopeful "sleazy" guys while having a few Sunday drinks with the girls. Yes, I was heavily intoxicated. I had recently gone out on a few dates with an emotionally unavailable guy that I didn't particularly romantically like all that much. But for the life of me, I couldn't understand why he wouldn't reply to any of my 5 million snap chats I had sent him that day (or week for that matter). If I'm honest, I was needy and desperate (there I said it). In my hazy drunken state "Do you want to be on the next Bachelor?" popped up on my facebook feed and I thought "why not?". Concluding my evening with a social media post "Things to do when your drunk: Apply for The Bachelor... Check". </p>
<p>The next day I woke around midday with a splitting headache and mouth tasting like last night's vodka. Sifting through drunken regrets; From the shots to the snap chats, to strobe lights flickering. Then I remembered, I applied for The Bachelor, and I sank further into my bedsheets consumed by drinkers remorse. </p>
<p>Within the week, I received an email "You have been invited to live audition for The Bachelor." </p>
<p>I was running late. The other 29 girls in my group audition had already signed in as they nervously waited for the call. I can't describe the feeling I felt when I walked in the door. Suddenly all eyes pierced into me; the room went silent. I felt their daggered stares upon me and heard little whispers about me as I signed in. I could cut the tension in the room with a knife. I possessed a strange confident calmness a part of me knew I was going to get the role. Speaking from a lifetime of talent quests and auditions I had only ever felt like this one other time in my life, that was when I won the Gympie Muster Maton Talent Search. As I turned around, smiled at the girls and said, "Hi Everyone, I'm Kat. How are you all feeling?". Finally, the energy lightened. </p>
<p>A highlight from my audition was a rose being thrown into the circle of ladies with the talent scout saying "Who wants it the most?". It was like a scene from a movie when the bride throws her bouquet into a pool of desperate single women. Nails clawing girls faces off, dresses ripped to shreds and toes fiercely trod on by diamonte stilettos. I was too busy observing to make any committed attempt, so I gave up after a brutal shove from the girl beside me. The rose was retrieved by a sweet brunette dressed in blue, that in my opinion was the prettiest girl there. </p>
<p>The talent scout asked, "Why do you think you deserve this rose?". </p>
<p>The lady in blue broke our hearts with a horrible "done me wrong" story with enough evidence of how "all males are arseholes" to turn any straight female off men forever. </p>
<p>The scout said, "If anyone thinks they deserve it more than her, feel free to take it." Without even a second thought I walked across the circle and laid claim to my rose. "Why do you think you deserve it more?" </p>
<p>I simply said, "I am the best version I have ever been of myself, and I'm too awesome to be this single." </p>
<p>So, I assume you know the rest of the story? I got the part. </p>
<p>May 2, 2014, I arrived at the Sydney Star Casino to greet 24 incredibly stunning girls as we were put into lockdown for four days to organise master interviews, photo shoots and our gowns and makeup for the first episode. </p>
<p>After our welcome meeting and introduction to the producers, I travelled down the escalator with a beautiful brunette as I inquisitively listened to the stunning women analyse the situation in vibrant colour. Her vocabulary made my heart flutter a little; my small town ears had never had the opportunity to hear someone speak with such grace and poetry. We shared a little about each other; she was passionate about art; I asked her "Whats your star sign?" she said "Leo." It was an instant trust and bond, right then I knew Chantal was going to be my first lifelong friend I'd make on this adventure. </p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/1e2d59d9a5ef346ffc89dfbdfd2a0d473a774636/original/screen-shot-2018-05-29-at-11-33-11-am.png/!!/b:W10=.png" class="size_l justify_center border_" />That evening we all gathered in the foyer. Sitting beside me was a girl who seemed different from the rest. She was casual, in her converse as she slumped back in the chair with her feet on the coffee table. Dressed in a k-mart khaki jacket with her wild blonde hair she was quiet and withdrawn. I introduced myself "Hey I'm Kat.", Her red eyes that looked to have been crying lifted to meet mine. She said something along the lines of "I think this is the most stupid thing I've ever done. It's the first time I've been away from my brothers and I'm struggling already", as she embarrassingly giggled at herself. We talked about her family and what she was feeling. I love connecting with people who aren't afraid to let you into their hearts. I can't recall an exact moment or time but it was like we always were friends. I felt an instant nurture wanting to protect this openly, vulnerable spirit and to this day, our relationship hasn't changed. Her name is Sam Frost. </p>
<p>Makeup call started at 10:30 am the day we were meant to meet the bachelor. 24 women was a lot to get through. I remember sitting in a hall being told we weren't aloud to talk to the other girls so it looks natural for TV when we meet. But we had been locked in our rooms for days with no communication, by the end of the day the assistant producers gave up. </p>
<p>My outfit got changed last minute, I adored the beautiful lace outfit I originally had but I was about to embark on an adventure of a lifetime I wasn't going to complain. </p>
<p>Four girls toppled into limos at a time; I can't explain the nervousness we all felt. We pulled up to this beautiful mansion boldly lit by fairy lights, beaming with television magic and a camera crew in every bush. When the producer called my name to step out of the limo I prayed that I wouldn't fall over as I took my last deep breath.</p>Katrina Burgoynetag:katrinaburgoyne.com,2005:Post/52633672018-05-29T11:32:38-05:002018-05-29T11:32:38-05:00How I Kicked Depressions Butt<p>1 Million Australian's suffer from depression, suicide being the biggest killer amongst young Australians. My hometown of Gunnedah has bid farewell to 3 males under 26 in the last 18 months; one was my first "boyfriend" who lived across the street from me. The guilt of knowing he was sick and I never reached out makes my tummy turn. In honour of Paul, I have made it a part of my purpose to reach out to people who are ill and encourage them to keep fighting and believing that they can get better. </p>
<p>This is my story on how I kicked depression's butt! I hope this helps someone today. </p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/5fc149b46803466ebe82841a9d80e98f81f7e5fa/original/screen-shot-2018-05-29-at-11-31-00-am.png/!!/b:W1sic2l6ZSIsIm1lZGl1bSJdXQ==.jpg" class="size_m justify_center border_" /></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em>May 2013 (Looking at this picture I can hardly see a spark in my eyes) </em></p>
<p>In July 2011, I was diagnosed with anxiety and depression. Finally, a name to that heavy weight in my chest that I had carried with me for as long as I can remember, an explanation as to why I felt so numb and was always reaching for my next big achievement so I can "finally feel happy." Little did I know that in the years to follow, my life would turn from an unhappy numbness to heartbreakingly devastating. </p>
<p>My first signs of depression come when I was 7. Having not yet discovered my need for self- expression I was an emotional creative; shaken up like a bottle of soda with the top still on. I told my Mum I didn't want to be alive. </p>
<p>Something must happen when you tell the universe that you want to be happy. For me, it was like a 3-year rehab of all my demons, imperfections and insecurities rising to the surface. In 2012, everything I touched turned to ash, I was fragile and helpless. I simply had run out of strength to keep dusting myself off. I could line up a million and one dominoes each engraved with a major event that led to my undoing as they all came toppling down. I pointed my finger at the ones who had "done me wrong", but the core of my problem was my own neglect.. I DIDN'T LOVE MYSELF. I would find myself sitting in the dark, in silence, nestling on a bean bag every Wednesday after seeing my Psychologist escaping with a bottle of red wine with my phone turned off. My numbness turned into bitterness, spitefulness, anger, hopelessness, drama and anyone who was left in my life was hanging on by a thread and I was holding the scissors. I wanted people to feel what I was feeling because I couldn't handle feeling it alone anymore. </p>
<p>I thought my depression was under control. I didn't know how to get better. I thought a few pills, counseling sessions and helplessly melting into my partners arms a crying mess at the end of the day was all apart of the healing process, but I had become a victim. </p>
<p>In October 2013, I hit rock bottom. It was like my worst nightmare had become a reality. I had my arms reaching out desperately to the people I loved but the distance between us kept growing further and further. Grasping for a savour my world closed in as the last person who believed in me closed the door and turned out the lights; my Mum was all I had left. I lay lost in my darkness feeling sorry for myself and trying to comprehend how I ended up here. Curled up in my bed sheets for weeks, some days I couldn't even get out. I lost 7.5kg in 2 weeks. I wanted to give up, and I thought about it a lot. </p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em>You have to come undone before you put yourself together. <br>You have to live a lot of storms before you learn what you can weather <br>You may have to take a chance and dance on</em><em>unfamiliar</em><em> ground <br>You may be broken, but you're too strong to break down. </em></p>
<p>I believe that grace finds you when you are ready to accept it. I was begging, pleading, praying (something that I had rarely done before). The day that I started reading "You Can Heal Your Life" by Louise L Hay was the beginning of a new journey for me. It was like a new chapter had begun in my life. I started obsessively reading books on empowerment, self-awareness, personal growth and spirituality. I started educating myself about my illness, learning my triggers and symptoms. Understanding how easy it is to reprogram my old negative behaviours and brain patterns. </p>
<p>Everything started to shift. Yoga had become a regular part of my life and for an hour of my day, I could escape my reality and just "be". My daily mantra was "I love myself" and it would be on repeat in my mind all day, every day. I was so lonely I started writing a journal just to express my feelings, unknowingly becoming more aware of what my body was telling me. Writing daily and analyzing what I was going through was like having a conversation with my soul. Lost for so long, I didn't realise how quickly I was re-connecting with this spirit of my own. I started to listen to where I was being guided and suddenly a path began to appear. It was like exciting opportunities and adventures would "just happen". </p>
<p>May 2014, only six months after "my darkest hours", I had the opportunity to be a part of a reality TV show. Looking back I think "what stupidity" I was mentally ill and putting myself in the spotlight on National Television to be judged and criticised by Australia. I was in a hotel room in lockdown for two days completely alone before filming began. As I wrote page after page in my journal I received a message, I knew this was going to be my last test in overcoming depression. If I could get through the experience, I was going to come off my medication after filming. </p>
<p>That promise of commitment and encouragement had become unwavering by July 2014. I knew I was ready, so bravely I saw my GP and decided to cease my medication. </p>
<p>It wasn't easy. Sometimes at night, I would feel so much pain surfacing. Learning to trust, I was well aware that my emotions needed to come to the surface. I needed to feel it and cry it and release it. I started calling this process "Shedding Layers". I had been single for almost a year and reflecting on it now; I don't think I could have done this process with a partner. I learnt how to take responsibility for my emotions, not relying on someone else to console me. I taught myself that I was going to be okay, every morning after shedding layers I awoke feeling freer. My body was self-cleansing anything that no longer served me until I had nothing left to let go. </p>
<p>My inner child started to come out and play as I began hearing music in my ears for the first time in years. My songwriting book was alive as the pages were being turned and filled up with all my happiness. </p>
<p>By November 2014 after the bravest year of my life, I rolled into the driveway in my white Toyota, turned the ignition off and watched the sun set in my rear-vision mirror. It had been a long time since I had dated or was told that I was special, and all my belongings I owned fit into my 3 x 3 metre bedroom. I had nothing and no one to appreciate the gift of life with. But at that moment, I realised that I was right where God had always intended me to be. I had been stripped down of my ego, humbled to the bone and somehow after coming through the pain of it all I had never felt more gratitude in my lifetime. </p>
<p>I had finally found happiness. </p>
<p>My Favourite Book Suggestions <br>You Can Heal Your Life- Louise L Hay <br>Buddist Bootcamp- Timber Hawkeye <br>The Four Agreements- Don Miguel Ruiz <br>The Way Of A Peaceful Warrior- Dan Millman</p>Katrina Burgoynetag:katrinaburgoyne.com,2005:Post/52633612018-05-29T11:29:53-05:002018-05-29T11:29:53-05:00I Met A Boy<p>I was 17, fresh out of school currently attending the College of Country Music in Tamworth and I met a boy. </p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/60ae2fafab8e6b8f79d21bb948e7059d10561e69/original/screen-shot-2018-05-29-at-11-26-44-am.png/!!/b:W1sic2l6ZSIsIm1lZGl1bSJdXQ==.jpg" class="size_m justify_left border_" /></p>
<p>By 17, I was managed by The Pub Group, who had such a strong belief in my potential. Warned many times, "you don't want to fall in love, you will settle down and give up music" but my adventurous spirit wanted to discover what love is. </p>
<p>He was a long curly blonde haired guitarist that captured my attention with his incredible guitar tone at the annual pickers night at "The Pub" in 2006. I knew Michael Muchow since I was 14 and my innocent and fragile heart felt safe in the hands of his kind soul. </p>
<p>We quickly became an incredible team, motivating each other to strive harder and reach higher. Muchow began playing some of the best gigs in Country Music, touring full time with The McClymonts and Kasey Chambers across Australia and in the US, along with playing shows and recording sessions with his peers, mentors and influential musicians and artists in the industry. I spent a lot of time working on my own craft with a proud smile watching him blossom to his full potential. Every song I would write I would share it with him and he would critique it encouragingly. </p>
<p>Muchow became an incredible influence. We were best mates; our relationship was comfortable and effortless. We shared many adventures together and grew together musically. In 2009 after almost four years together and seeing him nurture my songs. I built up the courage to ask him if he would do the honour of producing my debut album. </p>
<p>Creating White Flag was one of the most phenomenal experiences working with Muchow. We knew each other so well that he could express exactly who I was at the time through my music. His empathetic musicality and expression spoke my exact emotion for every song and with his help, we created an ARIA Charting album. Securing 2 Golden Guitar Nominations at the 2012 CMAA Country Music Awards. I was so proud of what we achieved together and grateful to have shared that moment with my best mate. </p>
<p>In July 2010, we excitingly got engaged. We always imagined each other in our lives so it felt like that was the path we were being guided. I remember in November 2011 he walked into my office and behind his eyes I could see that I had sucked the spirit out of him. I had drained him dry and I had no fire left in me. It was like we both "just knew" we had learnt everything we were meant to learn from one another. It was like the only way to grow together from that point was to be apart. </p>
<p>Muchow has continued to play a big role in my life as a "brother". I would like to share the rest of this story with you below (This story is pretty special to me, I feel so honoured to have had the opportunity to perform this song in the most prestigious songwriting venue in the world "The Blue Bird Cafe in Nashville" on October 14, 2015).</p>
<p> </p>
<p><iframe allow="autoplay; encrypted-media" allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="315" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/52oiOwEu0M8" width="560"></iframe></p>Katrina Burgoynetag:katrinaburgoyne.com,2005:Post/52633592018-05-29T11:26:03-05:002018-05-29T11:26:03-05:00If You Dream It You Can Do It, Part 2<p>Firstly I want to take a moment to wish that you have had a wonderful Christmas. I am currently writing from my home town Gunnedah, but will be traveling across NSW throughout the week! BIGGEST OF CHRISTMAS LOVE xxx </p>
<p>If you can dream it you can do it... Part 2 </p>
<p>My father who also has a musical pedigree (that somehow skipped his generation) grew up with a mother who sang and played the piano and a father who played The Violin, Saxophone and Clarinet just to name a few. My grandfather loved Jazz, and I spent my holidays in Sydney in awe of whatever musical instrument my Grandfather would bring for me to play with. My poor Grandfather would be made to sit and watch me perform shows for hours, then encourage my imagination by making suggestions for my next show. I believe my "ear" is a credit to my Grandfather Burgoyne. At two years old I could pick up a piano and work out nursery rhymes like twinkle little star. I adored him. </p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/840583db1fd79f25e8318616611a1060f93e0541/original/screen-shot-2018-05-29-at-11-24-31-am.png/!!/b:W1sic2l6ZSIsIm1lZGl1bSJdXQ==.jpg" class="size_m justify_left border_" /></p>
<p>Despite Dad not being "superstar" potential, every night before bed, he would have us in fits of laughter as he serenaded us with his repertoire of comedy songs. He was a left-handed man who will probably tell you his guitar playing career ended the moment he started learning guitar right handed, but his passion for music still continues today. I think he would have given Kevin Bloody Wilson a run for his money if he ever decided to venture into a music comedy career. </p>
<p>I wonder if my Dad ever knew that he was just about to bless his daughter with the very thing that would put food on her table and take her around the world? Christmas in the year 2000, I got my first guitar. </p>
<p>By Mid January 2001, I was enthusiastically entering Country Music Talent Quests at the Tamworth Country Music Festival. I remember it had been a hot summer, and I had trouble sleeping in the old sleep-out where my bedroom was so I pulled a mattress into the hallway and slept in the air conditioning. The alarm set for 5:30 am, as the Manilla talent quest kicked off at 8:30 am and we had an hour to drive. My clothes laid out ready to go, an innocent pink skirt and white top that I had got for Christmas that year. </p>
<p>8:30 am rolled around, and talent quest entrants started pouring out of the bathroom in sparkles and sequence. My Mother and I looked at each other in shock, and I sank into my chair feeling sick with nerves as I continued writing hand written lyrics with chords above the words so the band could play my songs. </p>
<p>When Mum and I look back, we laugh about this moment as I was just the innocent, clueless country girl. </p>
<p>As I stepped up to the band and gave them my chords above lyrics, they said, "We don't know this song". Most kids were playing Dixie Chicks or Shania Twain. I didn't know that you could perform covers. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>I said, "It's one I made up". I stepped up to the microphone and fumbled about for five minutes as I didn't have a pickup in my guitar and had to position another microphone for my guitar. I introduced myself, "G'day how are ya all going today? Are ya having a good time? This is a song I wrote called.." Not only was my banter terrible but my accent was incredibly Austrailian Bush country. The incredible band fumbled through my terrible chord charts every section of the talent quest. </p>
<p>I stood out like a sore thumb. I was that naive girl that everyone felt sorry for as I had no idea I was meant to have an outfit for each section and there is a "known list" of cover songs appropriate for talent quests, I needed a guitar with a pickup and maybe learn how to do my hair and makeup. I was awarded the encouragement award; I came to learn that this award was generally given to the worst person on the day. </p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/c32e8b1e9c46d32ade4c6c27d9395a9dec6b5bbb/original/screen-shot-2018-05-29-at-11-24-37-am.png/!!/b:W1sic2l6ZSIsIm1lZGl1bSJdXQ==.jpg" class="size_m justify_left border_" />Mum and I talked about what we learned as we traveled home. We both giggled about how foolish we looked but there was such a beauty to our innocence. Knowing that I had already outgrown my brand new guitar, within the week, my Dad played "fairy godmother" traded it in and arrived at my first ever Tamworth Country Music Festival with my new Little Black Guitar and some brand new sparkly stage clothes. </p>
<p>It would take me five years and a lot of disappointment before I would win my first country music talent quest. </p>
<p>It was the same time when I met Steve McCauley, a local legend in North West, NSW. Steve was my first guitar teacher, I would take my songs into him and he would teach me a "fancy" way to play them. After a few performances jumping up with Steves band by the age of 14 I was playing regularly, singing a few songs a set and learning how to lug on guitar. I started my apprenticeship playing till 1 am every Thursday at The Tamworth City Tavern known as The Tutor Hotel now. </p>
<p>Namoi Valley Indipendent Newspaer August, 2005 </p>
<p>By 16 I really started to blossom School Spectacular, Talent Development Project, Talent Quests, Songwriting Competitions, Pubs and Clubs, any performance opportunity I could find I would take it. My afternoons would consist of me running from the bus to my bedroom to play for at least 3 hours before having a nap and waking for dinner to then play through the night. </p>
<p>Although my music was going so well my Mum was concerned that I wasn't being a teenager. I would turn down opportunities to see my friends or go to birthday parties so I could sit in my bedroom and play. </p>
<p>A few major highlights in the younger years for me was winning the Gympie Muster Talent Search in 2005, Graduating the Talent Development Project, Performing on Mornings with Kerry-Anne, Attending CMAA College of Country Music and awarded an APRA Professional Development Award in 2009.</p>Katrina Burgoynetag:katrinaburgoyne.com,2005:Post/52633582018-05-29T11:23:46-05:002018-05-29T11:23:46-05:00If You Dream It You Can Do It<p>1992, Kyogle NSW <br>My mother packed up everything that would fit into her tiny little Mazda. My big brother Bradley sat in the front seat with the job of looking after our dog sitting in between his feet and my "job" was to look after the box of $1 tins of home brand canned food that sat beside my booster seat. We were on the road to start our new life in Gunnedah. </p>
<p>Looking back through my naive three-year-old eyes, my Mother was invincible. No older than what I am today, with long bold, fierce curly red hair. After three years of little work and raising two children alone, she had finally got full-time work at the Gunnedah Hospital as a nurse. Up until then she would make children's clothes to sell at the markets while she was studying her nursing. We didn't have a lot of money. Some weeks Mum would eat our left-overs but despite the little income and the old crumbling walls in our humble rental property my mother's spirit could not be broken. </p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/d101f539b8adf5e090c77c78be8ec474a8778c5d/original/screen-shot-2018-05-29-at-11-20-13-am.png/!!/b:W1sic2l6ZSIsIm1lZGl1bSJdXQ==.jpg" class="size_m justify_left border_" /></p>
<p>Not only did the prospect of a better life lay ahead of us but also an opportunity to bond with my "first music teacher". My grandfather was a police officer in Gunnedah, his love for Country Music began when he was 12 when he scrambled up the pieces of his brothers broken guitar with the promise of putting it back together so he could have an instrument to learn on. He was a 49-year-old silver fox with a far to early in life diagnosis for Parkinson's disease (but secretly every grandchild will tell you that Poppy's Parkinson's was what made him give the best cuddles). Between baking imaginary biscuits, and real ones with my Nanna. My Pops lap would be where you could find me while he would play his guitar and sing me country songs. It was there where I started my education on the Country Music Genre, Hank Williams, Slim Dusty, Kris Kristophison and more. My grandfather's repertoire books full of lyrics and chords from when he had played shows for years. He was even offered a record deal when he was 19, in his time he was a true showman. </p>
<p>My musical ear was being "tuned", as I learned my Pops songs I would sing along, I LOVED to sing. At this point my Uncle, who was only a few years older had started learning guitar, I became that nagging little brat with green cordial stains around my mouth, following him around the house requesting to serenade to me my favorite song, "You Are My Sunshine." By the time, I was 14, my Uncle and I would play shows together. We even recorded my famously terrible song "Goodbye, Goodbye, Goodbye" on a compilation album called "Heat Wave" for Rock Bands in North West NSW produced by Norma O'Hara Murphy. </p>
<p>I would also like to take a moment and mention how my guitar playing career could have potentially never begun when my Uncle broke my arm and ran off to leave me for dead so he had enough time to hide before Nanna and Pop could hear my screams of pain. </p>
<p>By the year 2001, I was performing regularly in Tamworth at "The Pub" for Open Mic nights and Songwriters nights (Tamworth just so happens to be 45 minutes from Gunnedah). It seems fated how a Penrith-born girl who had a passion for writing and singing country music ended up living less than an hour away from Australia's Capital of Country Music. </p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/d92b73984a6531c9015c3f23a56ad5b79dc9c1aa/original/screen-shot-2018-05-29-at-11-20-20-am.png/!!/b:W1sic2l6ZSIsIm1lZGl1bSJdXQ==.jpg" class="size_m justify_right border_" /> I was never a standout child. My pedigree was a disappointment measured to my lack of natural ability. I was never a pleasant singer to listen to, but I had more passion than all the other dreaming kids combined. I always had a great sense of rhythm and being the only kid at 11 writing song I was always encouraged; "You could be a songwriter in Nashville". </p>
<p>Being raised by a single Mum, she was 200% of a parent. After eight years of being single, she met my incredible step Dad, who also played a big roll in my story developing my gift. When we weren't making small trips to Tamworth for singing lessons or performance opportunities, my music adventures would have my Mum driving to any corner of Australia on weekends, while my Step Dad stayed home to man the family business. </p>
<p>In 1999, my parents started what would become a successful landscape supply yard and nursery in Gunnedah called "Gunnedah Lawns & Gardens". My brother would scrub and clean the birdbaths for $15 a week and I would sit in the office printing out lyrics and chords to songs. </p>
<p>By the time I could drive, if I had been up writing songs all night, my Mum would be ok if I didn't go to school until 10 am. Somedays I just would sit at home and write songs; my guitar was the only thing in the world that understood me. Seeing my Mum's fierceness and ability to create a life that she wanted from having nothing taught me the greatest lesson. "If you dream it, you can do it". I found it a struggle to go to school and have teachers tell me that I need realistic goals. To see the pitiful eye roll that I get from most non-musical people or the kids picking on me for being in the local paper again began to eat at my own self belief. </p>
<p>"Sing us a country song, come on. Big noter, you think you're better than everyone else". Come from a tiny little pip squeak red-headed girl with freckles who had a reputation for beating up girls who talked back to her. </p>
<p>I had a handful of genuine friends, among a group that I felt like an outcast. I was such a late bloomer that boys never even noticed me. I was somehow caught in two worlds, reality where I hadn't yet found myself and music where I felt at home. </p>
<p>To be continued...</p>Katrina Burgoynetag:katrinaburgoyne.com,2005:Post/52633572018-05-29T11:15:59-05:002018-05-29T11:19:11-05:00Welcome<p><strong>ORIGINALLY PUBLISHED DEC 13, 2015</strong></p>
<p>It was January, the year 2001. </p>
<p>My brothers old barely in tune nylon string guitar sat in the corner against the lemon coloured wallpaper meeting the high plastered ceilings of our old “haunted” federation style home. It had been my closest companion for almost 12 months and despite the terrible tone and the fact that every cat and dog in the neighbourhood would run and hide under the bed when I would play I had somehow found my bliss. </p>
<p>Welcome to my weekly Monday blog. </p>
<p>Blogging is brand new for me, so I’m going to ask you to help me along the way. I’m also an Aries, so my tendency to start something and never finish it is quite astounding and true to my nature, but here goes. </p>
<p>For those of you who don’t know me, my name is Katrina Burgoyne. I have spent more than half of my life obsessing and chasing opportunities with my greatest love and passion music.</p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/302989/5bcf186c3f0212c8ab115a188ab8965085588d1c/original/screen-shot-2018-05-29-at-11-12-55-am.png/!!/b:W1sic2l6ZSIsIm1lZGl1bSJdXQ==.jpg" class="size_m justify_left border_" /></p>
<p>Over the years my believers, friends and champions have shared some pretty exciting moments on this journey with me. Video blogging on youtube use to be my primary tool. Bringing all of my supporters to Nashville with me in 2009. You had a front row seat in recording my debut album. Together we walked the red carpet at the golden guitar awards. We shared the making of my debut video clip, tour with Kasey Chambers and Shane Nicholson, on the road antics and my favourite a Christmas on Hamilton Island. </p>
<p>We celebrated my album making the top 10 on the ARIA charts, 3 top ten singles, 2 Golden Guitar nominations, Winning an APRA Professional Development Award, Independent Artist Of The Year and more. </p>
<p>Then in 2012, I quietly ducked out the back door, stopped reaching out, took some time out to play in the ever so humbling dirt and figure out who I am and what my purpose is in life? </p>
<p>As I read through my list of accomplishments; all I see and feel is the ego of my 22-year-old self! Over the past few years, I have stripped back my layers, dived into the ever so confronting path of self-awareness and found my soul's purpose! </p>
<p>I have always felt a calling to be heard! In the simplest form, I want to change people's lives through music. I want to leave my fingerprint on your heart, I want to lead you out of darkness, want to challenge your perspectives, show you your beauty and encourage you to be the best version of yourself, and I want to evolve together! </p>
<p>Growth, overcoming rejection, passion, faith, love, self-belief and following your dreams will all be major themes for this blog. My purpose is to connect and empower people who are struggling to find their strength, voice and purpose. </p>
<p>My greatest passions are photography, drawing, spirituality, personal growth, psychology and of corse music. They will all be incorporated into this blog along with my own story, which I am really excited to share with you. </p>
<p>Thank you so much for joining me on this journey! </p>
<p>Let's enlighten one another! </p>
<p>Follow the link to receive monthly emails with all my local gigs and news. <br>http://eepurl.com/bJdSrP </p>
<p>THE STORY OF A FRIZZY HAIRED DREAMER <br>The Tomato Festival </p>
<p>Me at 14 years of age. Photo was taken by my step Dad "Gary" </p>
<p>With a book already full of original works and my brand new upgraded steel string guitar nestling on my lap, I was practicing for my first “Tomato Festival” talent quest. “Goodbye, goodbye oh mum don’t cry” I bellowed over my heavy rhythm hand that was loud enough to drown out the wailing of an untrained and untamed voice. </p>
<p>I bundled up my guitar and headed to the lounge room where my Mum and step Dad would unsuspectedly be sent to “practice performance jail”. </p>
<p>“Mum, could you please take me down to register for the Tomato Festival Talent quest today?” Said the pushy confident ram that I was </p>
<p>Piped up from behind the recliner chair, the TV went to mute and my step Dad sat up tall and asked “What are you doing in the Talent Quest?” <br>Knowing full well that my step Dad was concerned I had outgrown my tights and was too old now to look “cute” dancing to Shania Twain dressed in leopard print (Yes that happened). I replied, “I’m going to sing a song I wrote”. </p>
<p>My sarcastic (and very supportive) Step Dad said, “Well I think you better play us this song before you perform it” with a smug look on his face “I know people in this town, I won't have you embarrass me.” <br>After a personal rendition on “Goodbye” (where the title repeated 24 times). Finally, I got the approval to enter into the talent quest with an “I didn’t know you could play guitar and sing”. </p>
<p>My brand new guitar had a shoelace tied around the nut to hold the strap on correctly as I stepped up to the microphone. The whole town of Gunnedah had come out for the annual festival. Children played on the grass and adults enjoyed a beer and the summer sun as they talked amongst themselves, but I felt like all eyes were on me. I had never sung in public before, my teeth chattered. Nerves always affected me. “Goodbye, Goodbye, Goodbye, Goodbye, …………..” my legs finally no longer shaking just in time to play the last chord. </p>
<p>And the winner is….. KATRINA BURGOYNE </p>
<p>The whole afternoon my step Dad carried the trophy around with him, shouting to all his friends “Look what “we” won”.</p>Katrina Burgoyne